23
Ispin around, my fist colliding with Gruff’s nose. It’s the only way to get him to release me and he’s not expecting it which is why it connects with as much power as I can muster. I cringe at the sound of my fist connecting with his flesh, the cartilage breaking under the pressure and then the outburst of blood that streams from his nostrils. I ignore the pain in my knuckles as I rip myself away from his body.
I can’t let them hurt her. She was only here because someone else put her up to it. That’s not fair. They didn’t give her a choice.
I can see clearly she’s unwell, malnourished, in need of a good bath and some food, probably medicine too. I thought the same when she bought me my coffee –my poisoned coffee– and I thought it strange then. All the staff Alexander has employed here look healthy, happy even and it begs the question if they really know what happens within these walls. She didn’t look like she fit but then what did I really know about any of this? So I didn’t question it. Not until Lex stormed towards us like a demon sent straight from hell, his weapon drawn and directed at the girl.
I rush towards Lex, I’ll beg and I’ll plead until he gives her mercy.
But all that changes when I lock eyes with the girl over Lex’s shoulder. She’s suddenly pulled her own gun and has aimed it for the back of Lex’s head. Her hand shakes, her eyes wide with both vengeance and fear and the next thing I know, I’m ripping the gun from Lex’s hand and pulling the trigger.
She goes down hard. Quick too, the bullet hole in her chest blooming red immediately. Her hands hold it, the blood seeping through her fingers as if to contain a leak. When her body finally hits the floor she’s staring wide eyed at the wall.
Oh God.
Oh god!
I killed someone. Shit. I killed her for him!
The gun slips from my hand and hits the floor. Lex stares at me, seemingly frozen as the gun rattles against the hardwood floor and then my knees give out. The pain, the guilt, the nausea of what I’ve just done crippling me. My knees crunch on the hard surface as a sob rips from my throat.
What have I done!?
“S-she,” I stammer, shaking my head, trying to form words whilst my tongue refuses to cooperate, “she was going to kill you.”
All I can see is the young girl in front of me, she can’t be much older than me, her hair is blonde, ashy but greasy and dirty. Her eyes are a deep blue color and whilst her skin is pale and sickly, she has an olive complexion, one that probably glows had she been healthy.
“Clean it up!” Lex growls but I can’t see him. I can’t see the others either, just the dead girl. The one I killed. For him. For Lex.
Why did I do that? That’s twice.Twice! Why the hell would I save a man who wanted me dead only a few days ago, save a man who is keeping me here against my will. He’s a monster and yet I don’t want him to leave. I need him.
I’ve never needed anyone but for some sick and twisted reasonI need him.
How do you need a man you’ve only known for a few weeks? How has he suddenly become so important to me that all his misdeeds don’t even account for anything?
His body steps in front of mine, blocking off the image in front of me. With her out of sight the world comes back to me. I see Ryker step around me, Ainsley too but they keep a wide berth, making sure not to touch me. There’s shuffling, the movement of something heavy being dragged across the floor but I can’t see. Tears stream from my eyes, wetting my cheeks. I didn’t think I had any left to give but I can’t seem to stop them. I sob and I cry until Lex leans down and gently lifts me from the floor.
My legs feel like jelly, weak, like the bones have turned to mush but it’s not painful. They just don’t work. My stomach rolls.
When walking doesn’t seem to work, Lex leans down and swoops my legs from underneath me, hoisting me into the cradle of his arms. My arms automatically loop around his neck.
“Don’t look,” he whispers, “Tuck your face to my chest. Don’t look.”
So much death. So much blood.
I cry into his chest, wetting his white shirt as he carries me through the house and towards his bedroom.
He gently places me on the bed where I immediately curl into a ball.
He must have gone into the bathroom at some point because now I hear running water but I didn’t realize he had left until he’s in front of me again.
“Come, little bird, sit up.”
I do.
He slides my dress from my body, throwing it behind him and then removes my underwear. It doesn’t feel sexual, but my body responds to his touch, nonetheless.
I’m sick.