Chase glances at me. “Where were you when it happened?”
“I got tired waiting for the wind. I closed my eyes for just a second. At least it felt like just a second. Then I heard the splash and…” I shrug. “I got you right away.”
He nods. “But you definitely saw where he went in?”
“I saw the splash.” I steal a look at Chelsea. She’s pacing back and forth, biting her nails.
“It’s my fault. I should have stayed with you.” She points at me. “You never would have gone out on the boat. I never would have tried to swim to the boat and then panicked, and you never would have had to rescue me, and you might have rescued him.”
“It’s not your fault,” I say, a little sharper than I mean to.
“It is.” Chelsea sits, her knees bouncing rapidly.
“I was the one who brought out the sangria,” Mila says. “Igot him drunk. He wouldn’t have fallen without me. He would have been able to swim.”
“I’m sure he did swim,” I say.
“No.” Mila shakes her head. “I’m bad luck. I wanted to see the stars. I’m the whole reason we’re out here on the boat.” She finally turns and looks at us, and there’s an odd expression on her face. “I’m cursed. I’m a siren. People follow me to their doom.”
“No one is doomed.” I eye Chase carefully. “I really think Ryan is fine.”
He looks between me and the radio. “Well, you didn’t seem to think so a few minutes ago. We should call for help right now. We should have done that first.”
“I know.” I close my eyes. “Just wait. Let me think.”
“Where’s Emily?” Chelsea looks back at the house. “What are we going to say to her? What are we going to say to her parents?”
“Nothing. We’re not going to say anything. Ryan is fine.” I retrieve a stack of towels and hand them out. “We got into a fight, he did one of thoseYou’ll be sorrythings, and he dove in. The more I think about it, the more sure I am that he’s doing this to get back at me. At us. Chase, he was fighting with you all night. Chelsea. Don’t you think he might have some little passive-aggressive motive to Tom Sawyer you?”
“What do you mean?”
“Tom Sawyer fakes his own death and goes to his funeral to see how much everyone really cares about him. Also just to be an asshole,” Chase says. “I guess I could see that? But it’s fucked up.”
“This day has been fucked up, Chase. Right?” I look to Chelsea first and she nods.
“I can’t believe he would do that,” she says softly. “I just thought he was the one person who didn’t play mind games.”
“Everyone plays mind games,” Mila says. “We can’t help it. It’s in our wiring.” She looks a little comforted already. The power of a good lie is inestimable.
“We’re going to get back and find him waiting for us and laughing so hard,” I say. But that won’t work. Because they’ll know immediately that he’s still out here. If he is. Maybe he’s not. Maybe he was just messing with me. Maybe there’s no dripping man and my entire life has been one big delusion. Everything I’ve said makes perfect sense. People don’t sink. “You know, though… He was honestly upset. About us. Emily. Chelsea. Chase. Even you, Mila. His parents. The last thing he said was that he wanted to be as far away from us as possible.” I cringe as the words come out of my mouth.
Chase doesn’t buy it for a second either. He knows me too well. “Ryan wasn’t going to suddenly take off, no matter how pissed he was.”
“But we all heard him,” Mila says hesitantly. “When the wind died. Before Chase and I went below. He said he didn’t want to be hereorat home anymore. We all heard him say it.”
“Why does it sound like we’re standing here constructing an alibi?” Chelsea glares at us one by one.
“My cousin was in prison for six years,” Mila says quietly. “I would basically do anything to avoid going through that. Anything.”
Chelsea stares at me. “Kennedy. Don’t make me go along with this.”
I swallow, my throat tight. “No one is making anyone doanything. He said what he said. He’s probably back at the house.”
“And if he isn’t?” Her voice edges up in pitch.
“Then we can look for him, or wait it out, or call the police,” I say. “Unless you think some sort of supernatural being pulled him under. Does anyone believe that?”
Not for one second.
Chase looks at the radio again. “They’re going to ask why we didn’t call right away.”
I meet his gaze evenly. “Ifthat were to happen, which it won’t, we’d tell them the truth. He threatened to run away, told me I’d miss him, and swam off.” My mouth and throat burn every time I spit out another lie. I may not have taken the time to think it through in the moment, but I knew exactly what would happen when I pushed Ryan into the water. There’s no question. Whether Ryan miraculously made it back to the house or not, I’m going to hell for this. The only thing that remains to be seen is whether my life is ruined before that happens or not.
And I already know before we get back to the house, before we face Emily, patiently studying her cards in the attic. I know it in my bones.
No one is ever going to find him.