“Baby, I did not do what you think I did. I learned my lesson. I’m done with that shit, all of it. Been done with it for a long fucking time. I swear to you. I only want you.”
She said nothing.
“After all we’ve been through, you’re gonna sit there and tell me it’s the end?”
She seemed totally unmoved by his argument, and that scared the shit out of him. For the first time in his life he began to fear he might really lose her, for real this time.
He swallowed and ran a palm over his face, a cold sick feeling forming in the pit of his stomach. Without her, he was nothing. She gave his life meaning. Yeah, he had the club, and he loved his brothers. But Mary was his center; she’s what grounded him like nothing else in his life, not the club, not his brothers, not even Billy. Of course he loved his son, always would, but it was Mary who was the center of his world. Without her, he’d be a fucking mess. It’d all go to shit, all of it.
And he couldn’t let that happen. So he’d better fucking tell her what she meant to him, and he’d better do it quick. He was a man, a biker, and therefore not good at this shit, but he knew he’d better man-up, swallow his pride and find the words. If it took baring his soul out here on this rooftop, then that’s what he’d do.
He rose to his feet, grasped her hands and pulled her up. Then he took her face in his hands, and brought his down to within an inch of hers.
“I love you, Mary. You are my world, my life. You’re everything to me. I swore to you I was done with that shit, and I am. The problems we had, we worked through them all. I haven’t been with anyone else, and I promise you, promise you I never will. Do you understand me?”
She stared up at him, her eyes glazing. He knew she wanted to believe the words, but the hurt she felt ran deep.
“I swear to you, Mary, I did nothing with her. It’s you I love. What you and I have, right here,” he shook her. “It’s special. Ain’t found it with anyone else. Knew the day I laid eyes on you, you were the one for me. And I know I’ve screwed up in the past. I haven’t always been there when you needed me most. And I know I don’t fucking deserve you. But I’m asking you please, don’t walk out on me.”
“Dog—”
“Not lettin’ you go. Not now. Not ever. You walk out that door; I’ll find you and bring you home. No matter how far you run.”
She stared up at him, saying nothing. Jesus Christ, was she really done with him?
“Do you still love me?” he asked, studying her eyes, searching, hoping he’d still see that love buried there somewhere.
When she didn’t reply, he shook her. “Do you? You don’t, I might as well take a walk off the edge of this roof right fucking now and get it over with, because I’m dead inside without you.”
“Dog—”
“I’m not playin’, Mary. You walk out on me, it’ll break me. That what you want?”
She shook her head, tears rolling down her cheek. “I just want us to love each other.”
“We do, baby. We do.” He paused, his thumb brushing the tear away. “I know I’ve fucked up in the past. I know I put you through hell, but I’m done with all that. All the bad stuff that’s happened to us, that’s all in the past. I love you, Mary. You. I’d stop breathing if I didn’t have you anymore. And I don’t care if we never have another baby. I just can’t lose you.”
His mouth came down on hers. He tried to show her how he felt the only way he knew he was good at. The kiss was filled with all the feelings he didn’t know how to communicate with words. It was soft and tender, and achingly gentle.
Finally, he broke off.
“I’m sorry I put you through all this.” His eyes searched hers. “Forgive me?”
She stared back at him for the longest moment in his goddamn life before finally nodding and giving him the reprieve he’d been waiting for like some inmate on death row. And swear to God he felt his body deflate in relief. He pressed a kiss to her forehead, holding it for a moment as he thanked God for her. Then he took her into his arms and just held her close. Finally he pulled back to look into her eyes.
“Come on. Let’s go home. We’ve got some makeup sex to get to.”
Before she could say a word or disagree, he tossed her over his shoulder and headed for the door.
“Dog!” she shrieked. “Put me down.”
He smacked her ass. “Nope. I’m takin’ my woman home.”
He carried her down into the loft.
The guys broke out in applause when they saw Dog hauling his ol’ lady through the loft.
“Hey, Mary, did the boy sufficiently grovel enough?” Cole teased.