She nodded slowly. My answer, thetruth, seemed to sink in.
“And as gross as it is to think of you going around and doing…thatwith random women, it’s not like that’s a crime. I mean, I was such a handful when you were raising me that you pretty much had to put your love life on hold through my teenage years.”
“You weren’tthatbad.”
She chuckled. “Come on, remember the time I stole the car and drove to Boulder because I was convinced I wanted to drop out of high school and be a full-time fire dancer?”
That got a laugh out of me. “Oh, yeah. I had to take two days off work and go on a full detective hunt. Whatever happened to your fire dancing? You were actually pretty good at it, as far as I remember.”
“Let’s just say someone on the streets of downtown Boulder I was performing for had to make do without eyebrows for a week or so.”
We both smiled.
“Anyway,” she went on. “The point is that I don’t want you to think that I’m one of those kids who wants you all to myself. In fact, nothing would make me happier than you meeting someone special and falling in love, being able to share your life with somebody.”
“Well, thanks. But love’s the last thing on my mind right now – hard to think about that stuff when you’ve got a pair of newborn twins at home.”
She bit her upper lip. “God, that makes this all so complicated. Like, I can’t forgive Sadie. How the hell could I do that? She lied to you and lied to me and even lied to her parents. Where’s the room for forgiveness there?”
I said nothing, sensing she had more on her mind.
“But, as weird as it is to say, she’s my…what is she, exactly? Stepmom? Whatever it is, she’s the mother of my brother and sister. And as much as I’ve been out of the picture over the last couple of months, I want to make sure you know that I’m planning on being a big part of their lives. And I want to make up for these last few weeks.”
“They’d love to have their big sister in the picture. And I would love that, too.”
I reached across the table and took her hand. It was a risk, I knew, but one I was willing to take. To my relief, she let my hand rest on hers.
“Buther,” she said, looking away and shaking her head as she brought her hand to her lap. “How the hell can I forgive her?”
“Don’t think about forgiveness right now,” I said. “I know you likely don’t care too much about what’s on her mind, but Sadie’s not expecting it at all.”
“Yeah? And what is she expecting?”
I shrugged. “Hard to say. I know the issue between you and her is rough, so I don’t poke at it. But I do know that all she’s said to me about it is that she’ll do anything to make way for you and the twins to have a good relationship, even if that means her leaving the house whenever you want to come over and visit.”
Camilla said nothing at first, and I could sense that my words weren’t what she’d been expecting to hear. Maybe she’d thought Sadie would be as mad at Camilla as Camilla was at her.
“Well, whatever. I’m not even close to taking her off my shitlist. But…I want to see the twins. Work’s been crazy, and I know things between us have been tense. That doesn’t matter, though, right? We can figure things out between you and me, and in the meantime, I can be the big sister I should’ve been all along.”
I gave her hand another squeeze. “I’d like that.”
The rest of the conversation went smoothly. We chatted about work, how crazy things had been at the DA’s office and how the higher-ups at Pitt Medical were already thinking about pulling me up to an executive position so I could oversee the opening of a few more OB/GYN clinics in Denver that would be geared toward serving the disadvantaged communities in the city.
When we parted, we had a concrete plan for her to swing by the house in a few days to spend some quality time with the twins. I had a big damn smile on my face all the while, beyond excited at the idea of my family, old and new, coming back together.
There was still the Sadie situation, but that didn’t need to be resolved in a day. More than that, most of it was out of my hands. As much as I’d always been the sort of person to want to solve everything, I knew I had to step back with this one. The matter was between Sadie and Camilla.
I arrived home feeling like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Stepping into the house, I was greeted with the sound of a baby babbling – one of my favorite noises in the world.
“Alright, alright – hold your horses.” Sadie’s voice came from the den. I began to make my way there through the kitchen, pouring myself a mug of coffee as I did.
She was in the den with the twins, and like I’d done so many times over the last two months, I found myself simply staring.
Sadie was dressed in her usual hanging around-the-house outfit of yoga pants and a loose-fitting, scoop-neck T-shirt. Even that was enough to serve as a magnet for my eyes.
Mug in hand, I leaned against the kitchen island and watched her. Andy was asleep, one of his tiny hands draped over his face in the way it often was. Emmy, on the other hand, was taking a bit of work. Sadie had the little girl in her arms, rocking her gently back and forth as she sang a quiet song.
I wanted to help but didn’t want to interrupt. So, I sipped my coffee and watched.