17
“Morning, Joe.” Superintendent Tom Young stands over my desk. His gaze drifts over the piles of paperwork I’m yet to get through before I start my patrol for the day.
“Sir.”
“Come to my office.” He walks away, leaving in his wake a tremor of uncertainty in my belly.
I close the door behind me as he sits into his well-worn, fake leather chair and brushes a hand over his tired face. He looks like a portrait gone wrong – one that the artist crumpled up and tossed away just to try and flatten out again. “Sit, please.”
I sit down and get a whiff of vanilla as I do. He looks at me for a long moment with a pensive expression, and whatever hope I’d had that this would be the moment I have been waiting for and that my privileges and rank would be reinstated, leak away with his hardening stare. “Let me cut to the chase.”
Fuck.
“What happened between you and Izzy, that was unfortunate, and I know you’ve been a good sport taking your demotion and working your ass off to make amends but” —he shifts in his chair and my heart sinks deeper— “the prosecution thinks it would be best if you were kept away from any of the Izzy files and case from now on—”
“But—”
“I know.” He cuts me off with his tone and a look that demands my silence. “I know no one knows this case better or deserves the accolades. Fuck knows we’re screwed and so far behind and that your help would be invaluable, but you created a fucking mess, and your name showing up on any document, any piece of evidence, anything at all, could be thrown out, so until further notice you’re back off the task force.”
“But, Tom—”
“There are no arguments here, Joe. It’s done.”
“And my rank?”
“Remains, for now.”
“For how long?”
“Fornow.” He doesn't elaborate and conveniently doesn’t give me a timeline.
“Annie is pregnant.”
“Congratulations.” His smile is genuine but means nothing as he offers nothing else.
“I need to know when.”
“I can’t tell you that, Joe.”
“I need something…”
“When I have something for you, you’ll be the first to know.” He stares at me with a blank expression, giving me nothing more.
“Tom.” There’s an edge to my voice we both hear, a dangerous anger that leaks into every part of me.
“We both have work to do. You’ll be assigned a new patrol area today. See yourself out.” He turns towards his computer screen, and I push myself from the chair then step towards the door. “And, Joe, pass on my congratulations to Annie.”
“Yes, sir.” I step out of his office, and it takes every ounce of self-control not to slam the door in my wake.
I charge down the corridor and towards the exit. Fuck this shit. Haven’t I paid enough? Hasn’t it been long enough? How long will I have to keep paying for a single moment of misjudgement? I barrel through the front door and into the cool air, I suck in lungful after lungful of long heavy breaths, trying to calm my hammering heart and cool the thick hot anger that coats my skin.
“Excuse me, Detective Sergeant?” I swirl at the voice and find Amy standing there watching me.
“What the fuck are you doing here? I told you, you can’t come here,” I whisper-hiss at her, my eyes flickering around the station.
“I know, I just...” She hangs her head for a second before looking up again. “Look, I’m sorry. I know I was out of line.”
“Yeah, you were.”