CHAPTER10
“Unrequited love does not die; it’s only beaten down to a secret place where it hides, curled and wounded.”
—Elle Newmark
Cassie
Unrequited love. I wanted to scream after thinking about the two words, but the saying that continued to repeat in my mind was very true. Maybe I’d been in love with all three of them since the very first time I’d laid eyes on them. They’d been larger than life even then, driven by fury and their passion for life. They’d thought they held the world in the palm of their hands, able to mold every nuance in whatever way they’d wanted. I’d been in awe not only by their beautiful villainous attitudes, all three holding a dangerous persona wrapped around them like a beacon of honor, but also by their determination that Garrison remain a part of their pact.
There hadn’t been many days since that fateful day I hadn’t thought about them.
I brushed my fingers across my lips, as if my actions would help me memorize their savage kisses.
Brutal.
All three men were brutal by nature, true savages, or so I’d told myself dozens of times. But as Alexander cupped my face, brushing four of his fingers across my skin, I was once again pulled into the same torrent of heartache and longing I’d felt the moment I’d been forced to sit across from him at a table. His aroma was strong, laced with a heavy dose of testosterone, the look on his face nothing short of a primal beast.
“So beautiful,” he whispered seconds before gripping my chin with his thumb and forefinger, lowering his head and capturing my mouth.
For the first time since I could remember, I felt beautiful. Would it be so bad to let go, to enjoy the moment shared between them? I wasn’t married, had yet to have a boyfriend for more than two dates. I’d kept to myself on purpose.
Because you were waiting for them.
No. Hell, no. That wasn’t true.
Was it?
I pried at my mind, trying to find whatever small snippets of rational brain cells were left. I couldn’t want this. That went against everything I’d worked for.
The kiss was primal and naughty, the taste of him tangy, the hint of a cigar. I found myself kissing him back, enjoying everything about the intimate act.
God, this was a nightmare.
Oh, no. This just couldn’t happen.
Alexander’s hold was possessive, his eyes never leaving mine.
I continued squirming on his lap, but instead of punching him to get away, I was kneading his chest, trying to rationalize what had just occurred. Everything about this was utter madness. I didn’t know any of the men, and fantasizing didn’t count.
The powerful mafia leader kept my rapt attention, brushing his fingers up and down my back. The kiss was an exquisite reminder that he was a dangerous man, but also one who enjoyed indulging in his darkest fantasies. But on this sunny afternoon in the middle of a mysterious location, he had allowed himself to become a different man.
While still dominating, he was sharing his needs with two men he’d spent almost every day with for years. I’d sensed their closeness the moment all three of them were in a room together. It was obvious to me they’d shared more than just criminal acts together. That both disgusted and enticed me.
I finally pushed my hands against him, breaking the strangely captivating connection, unable to stop shaking. I’d been dragged into the situation a lioness. I had no intention of going down without a fight. I had difficulty breathing as I concentrated on the way he was staring at me.
His grip on my chin tightened as he lowered his gaze, his nostrils flaring as he studied my breasts. I’d never felt so naked in my life.
Or so wanted.
A warm flush crept along my jawline as he rose from the chair, keeping my feet dangling in the air for a few seconds before putting me down.
“What are you going to do?” Duh. Wasn’t it obvious? Maybe I just needed to have them tell me. But what would that do, reaffirm they were horrible bastards? Maybe so.
“Now, we’re going to fuck you,” Daniel said, the sound of his voice no longer recognizable.
Alexander chuckled. “It would seem our innocent bird doesn’t believe us.”
“I’m not innocent, but that’s not going to happen,” I maintained, able to get out of his clutches but nearly tumbling over the coffee table. Brogan was there to catch me, swinging me around to face him, his hand immediately sliding down my spine. He used a single finger, rolling the tip down the crack of my ass before cupping my bottom.