“Whatever I want?”
“Yes! Please, slow down!”
He does, finally, and I cover my face with my shaking hands. If a deer had come running out, or even a raccoon, that might’ve been it. We could both be dead.
A lit road comes into view when I lower my hands. He would’ve had to slow down once we hit traffic. I recognize the intersection as being close to the park in town. At least I don’t feel so disoriented now.
Rather than pull up at the red light, Hayes pulls to the side of the road. “Get out.”
“What?”
“Get out of the car. You wanted out? Go.”
Is he bluffing? It doesn’t look or sound that way. “But we’re a couple of miles from home.”
“My home. It’s not your home. It’ll never be your home.” Hayes opens the door this time. “Go. I don’t want you anywhere near me.”
What am I supposed to do? I get out and slam the door for good measure, then watch him race off in the opposite direction of the house. Where’s he going? Why do I still care?
It’s too late and too dark to walk home. I cross the road once the light turns green, then sit down on a bus stop bench to wait for an Uber while taking deep breaths to calm my shredded nerves.
I only thought Hayes hated me before.
Now? I’ll be lucky if I live through him.
23
Meet me at the pool at lunch. Alone. H.
He slid the note my way after history class. By the time I unfolded the paper and looked up at him in surprise, he was on his way out the door.
What is it this time? How is he going to torture me? This is the first contact we’ve had since that terrible night in the car, after Theo’s. He wants me to meet him at the pool? Why? To drown me? Or maybe he wants me to watch while he drowns himself. Either way, I’m not interested.
Or so I tell myself as I walk to English class. What’s he going to do if I don’t go? That’s a question I’m not sure I want the answer to. He’s going to get angry with me, frustrated, and that never ends well. Maybe it’ll be better to get it over with. He can’t do anything to me here at school, right?
“Don’t expect me at lunch time,” I tell Salem after class.
“Why, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing. I just have to go to the library.” Whether or not she believes me, I can’t tell. One thing about her is, she doesn’t push for answers when they aren’t offered. Probably because she doesn’t like being questioned herself.
By the time lunch rolls around, I doubt I could’ve eaten anything if I tried. My stomach is in knots from trying to figure out what Hayes has in mind. I open the heavy door leading to the pool, almost wincing at how loud the sound is when there’s nobody else here.
No, that’s not true. There’s one other person already here, and he offers a smug little grin when I walk in. “I didn’t know if you would come.”
“I figured it was the safer choice.” I look around rather than look at him, standing with his back against one of the ladders leading up to the diving boards. He’s so proud of himself. Getting exactly what he wanted once again. “So? Why did you want me to meet you here?”
“There’s something up there. I need you to see it.”
He points up and I tilt my head back, back, looking all the way up at the highest board. “Up there?”
“Yeah.”
“What could be up there that I need to see?”
“You’ll know when you see it.”
“Can’t you go up and get it and bring it down?”
“What, are you afraid?”
“Most people would be. How many feet up?”
“It’s seven-and-a-half meters, so around twenty-five?”
“Twenty-five feet? No, thank you.”
“Coward.”
I fold my arms. “Fine. I’m okay with that.”
“I promise you’ll be glad you went.” When I roll my eyes, Hayes mimics me by doing the same thing. “What, you think I would push you off the board in the middle of the school day?”
“It would not surprise me.”
“Just trust me. I only have good intentions this time.”
Maybe it’s the sincerity in his voice—either that, or I’m a complete glutton for punishment. No, it’s probably that I don’t want him to win. I want to show him I can be brave. I’m not the coward he thinks I am.
Whatever the reason, I leave my backpack on the bleachers before taking hold of the ladder. This is probably the dumbest thing I’ve ever done.
“I’m right here behind you. You’re not going to fall.”
“Great. I wasn’t worried about that until you just said it.” He laughs softly but doesn’t say anything else, allowing me to climb while suffering silently. Why am I doing this? Why do I let him push me into things like this?