Daisy’s mouth opened and then closed as she thought another moment. “The lifeguard?”
Benny nodded. “That summer, didn’t you think it was odd that I dragged myself to the community pool nearly every day with my pile of library books? Me, the girl who hated wearing a swimsuit and usually shunned the sun? I was there because I hoped that maybe, just maybe, Scottie would look at me and see me as someone he might…like.”
“Why didn’t you ever tell me? I would never have dated him had I known you liked him.”
“It didn’t matter. He didn’t want me.”
“That’s not fair. Benny, think about it. He and I were both eighteen. You were…what? Fourteen? I don’t think Scottie would have dismissed you because you weren’t his type, but because you were still a kid. You know, when we were dating, he always liked you. He thought you were funny and cute. Do you remember that time we took you with us to the Fourth of July fireworks show? We were all set to go and you were in lying on the couch reading a book. It was his idea to bring you along. And why? Because he liked you. Maybe not the way you wanted, but with time and age, that could have changed.”
Benny hadn’t known any of that. Especially about the Fourth. She’d been certain that Daisy had dragged her with them because she felt sorry for her. “He really thought I was cute? You’re not just saying that to try and make me feel better?”
“You were cute. You are cute. There is nothing to make up. Which is bringing me to my second question. Why did you think you had to change at all? I mean, come on, Benny. You’re the success here. Out of the two of us? You’ve always been so smart and independent, knowing what you wanted and then setting out to get it. You’re a doctor, for crying out loud, and everyone is so proud of you, me included. But what can anyone say about me? I’m the failure of the family. I didn’t get good grades in school and never really knew what I wanted to do when I grew up. Two months pregnant with Jenna, I dropped out of college before I even completed my degree to get married to Leo. Being pretty only goes so far. Now I’m divorced and, other than three of the most amazing kids on the planet, what do I have to show for myself? If anyone needs a makeover here, it’s me.”
Benny had never ever thought of her sister as a failure. But hearing Daisy say all of that, she could see her sister believed it. Daisy thought Benny was the success. It was like her world was being flipped upside down.
“Daisy, you are not a failure, and I’m so sorry that you could ever believe that. You are smart and warm and have the biggest heart of anyone I know. You also have your own talents. You started over with nothing, financially wiped out, and over the past year you have found a job you love, moved you and the kids out of our parents’ home and into a pl
ace you’re paying for on your very own, and your kids are bright and smart and happy. You are a success.”
They looked at each other for a moment before Daisy reached forward and pulled Benny into a hug. “You are, too. Don’t sell yourself short.”
This time, the tears that filled Benny’s eyes weren’t because of her own pain, her own self-pity, but in realizing that she wasn’t the only one who’d thought she wasn’t good enough.
Who would have thought that Daisy could ever have been jealous of her. It seemed insane.
Tears wiped away, Daisy studied her again. “So…is it Henry you want?”
That had come out of nowhere. “What?”
“Don’t play coy with me. I’ve seen you two together. We all have. It’s clear you guys are crazy for each other. What you’re doing with this Luke guy—perfect dream guy or not—is beyond me. Is that why you’re upset? Did something happen with Henry?”
“You could say that.” She dropped forward, covering her face with her hands. “There may have been a few more things we practiced together.”
Daisy sat openmouthed as Benny detailed the first kiss she and Henry had shared on her couch followed up with the totally unexpected but heart-stopping kiss out in the garden at their parents’ on Sunday. Not to mention last night’s horrible fight.
There was a moment of silence as Daisy continued to process.
“Are you going to say anything? Because I feel like a totally horrible person right now, having said those things to Henry. Half of them weren’t even really true. Then there’s the utter crap he said to me.”
More silence as her sister studied the ceiling.
“What? What are you not saying?”
“I think both of you embellished things a bit, but I also think there was some truth in each of your comments.”
Benny blinked. “Wait. Whose side are you on?”
“Yours. Always yours. It’s just that…Henry does have a point. If you’re not being yourself—not being the same outspoken, strong-minded person who I love and appreciate, then you aren’t being honest. How can you know if you’re right for each other if you can’t tell Luke something as simple as the fact that you hate sushi?”
“I will be honest with him. Just like with the golf, in time I will…” She trailed off. It was hard to hold on to a position that you were beginning to doubt yourself. “Okay, but the thing is, Henry told me to do all this—be this person who licks her lips, bats her eyes, pretends avid interest in anything her date says—and it’s a tad hypocritical now for him to chew me out for following his advice.”
“Yes…Henry. That leads me to the other question. Why was he so outraged by it all? If he is ‘just a friend’ and not interested in you, why does he feel so strongly about seeing you feed a churro to your date?”
“I haven’t the faintest idea.”
“Don’t you?” her sister asked, smiling. “Because I think that maybe Henry is feeling something stronger for you than friendship. But because of this distorted view you have of yourself and your own value, you’ve convinced yourself that Henry could never be interested in someone like you. The thing is, until you tell him the truth about how you truly feel, put it all out there, how will you really know?”
“Know how I feel?”