It was only as they stepped onto the elevator that Henry finally spoke. “About earlier. That kiss. I’m sorry. That was entirely inappropriate.”
Her stomach felt like it was dropping through the floor, and they hadn’t even started their ascent. He was sorry?
She couldn’t say anything, only stood there frozen. Nodding. Like she understood.
“I think we’d just had such a great day and there was this sudden rush of adrenaline as I saw you sitting there, your face flushed and bright. I couldn’t resist. It just felt like the most natural thing to reach down and kiss you. Only…” He paused and raked a hand through his hair, trying to find words as the elevator grunted and started to climb.
“Henry, you don’t have to explain anything. I get it. You’re used to planting that mouth on anything with breasts, and I was no exception.” Even though she’d said this through a forced smile, intending it to be a joke, she’d sounded more bitter than she’d intended, but it couldn’t be helped.
“No. It’s not like that. You’re not like anyone else. That’s why my kissing you was most definitely the wrong thing to do. In the past couple of weeks you and I have become friends. Really good friends, and I don’t think I could ever say that before about a woman. It’s been really, really nice and not something I want to risk losing. Not with my track record.”
Right. Why was she such an idiot? She knew this. He’d so much as told her so himself. Men either wanted to sleep with you or they didn’t. She’d been permanently friend zoned. And it hurt a hell of a lot more than she’d thought possible.
The elevator was just cresting seven. Three more flights. Time to get this conversation over with and run back to her place to lick her wounds.
For now, be positive. Don’t let him see how much his apology stung.
“Henry, don’t be ridiculous.” She delivered a megawatt smile, her face feeling like it would crack under the pressure. “It was a nice kiss—no. A great kiss. But you don’t have to worry about me. I know we’re friends. Luke is the whole reason I’ve been doing all of this, and thanks to your help, I’m finally getting what I want. Really. Don’t give it a second thought.”
His shoulders sagged in obvious relief. He faked a punch to her right arm. “You’re a great woman, Benny Sorensen. You’re going to make some lucky bastard the happiest man in the world.”
The doors were opening, and she rushed forward, needing to distance herself from him as fast as she could. “Well, thanks for the lesson today. But I’m pretty wiped out, and if I’m going to look human again tomorrow, I should probably get to bed.”
“Okay. I’ll catch you later.” He didn’t argue with her or try to coerce her into an episode of The Good Wife like he’d done in the past.
She made it to her place before any tears could fall, thank God.
It wouldn’t be fair for her to make Henry feel guilty over her misguided feelings. She should know by now that men like Henry were completely out of her league.
Unlike Luke and the other men who’ve shown her interest in the past couple of weeks thanks to the shiny new package they’d concocted, Henry wasn’t fooled by the makeup, the new clothes, or the haircut.
Henry knew the real Benny.
And as she’d feared, he knew she just wasn’t good enough.
Chapter Eighteen
Henry was in a foul mood. He knew it as he nodded and ignored the well wishes when he left the gym earlier that morning, when he snapped at the parking lot attendant as he’d pulled into the lot at work, when Marion, his assistant, mused about why he’d looked like something the cat dragged in.
Two cups of coffee later, his mood still hadn’t improved, and he knew why. Because he was furious. Annoyed. Frustrated. At one person.
Himself.
What had he been thinking getting so close to a woman like Benny when he should have realized how dangerous she was? Dangerous in how absolutely perfect she was, and it was inevitable that he’d start having feelings for her.
Because just as much as he wanted her, wanted the happiness that would come with being with her, wanted that kiss to go on forever, he’d known deep down that things would never work out.
People like Henry didn’t have a happily-ever-after. People like him were destined to be alone.
He felt like he’d spent his entire life alone. Not wanted and abandoned by his mother, abandoned in death by his heartbroken father.
So just for another moment, he’d pretended that what he and Benny had could be real. That it could be forever.
Only as soon it was over, the reality of the situation came crashing down. He could never have Benny Sorensen. Not the way she wanted. Not forever.
So although it had been a little late, he’d had to be honest with her last night in the elevator. Had to put the brakes on things before he was too far gone. Before he did something stupid like fall completely in love with her. Before he could be too invested only to have her realize things wouldn’t work out and leave him. Like everyone inevitably did.
He had to admit, however, that seeing how quick Benny had been to agree with him that their kiss had been a mistake had been a bit of a bruise to his ego. She could have at least had the courtesy to look a little disappointed.