Chapter Twenty
Trey
By late afternoon, my head is spinning. I climb into my pickup and twist on the air-conditioned. The stale air of the cab swirls around and slowly takes on the scent of Black Ice from the fragrance tree swinging from my radio knob.
When I left Natalie at her sister’s house last night, I headed to the gym and worked out for a couple of hours. It was good to work off some steam. I shift in the seat and cringe. I should have taken the Harley out for a spin, and my legs wouldn’t ache right now.
Where do I go from here? I believe Natalie still cares about me, but maybe I’ve been fooling myself. Is it time to move on once and for all? I smack the steering wheel with the palm of my hand.
How is that even possible? I haven’t moved on in over a decade. Maybe I’m destined to be alone. To be the uncle and surrogate uncle to my family and friend’s children. It sucks, but if I’m not with Natalie, I don’t see creating a family with anyone else.
I pull down the gear shift, and my phone buzzes. I shift back into park.
Natalie: I planned to talk to you tonight, but someone called in, and they need me at the hospital. Can we make plans for tomorrow after you get off work?
All the air in my lungs disappears. I try to battle past the fear and nausea in my gut. Shit. It’s better to know than to wonder, right? At least, she’s not ignoring me.
I can’t wait until tomorrow. Shit. It’s got to be now. Waiting even a couple hours is too long.
Me: Will you have a break?
Natalie: In about twenty minutes.
Me: I’ll be there.
I toss my phone onto the passenger seat cushion and roll my neck. Don’t be a pussy. I can hear Leah smarting off to me as I back out of the parking space. “I’m not a damn pussy.”
Shit. But I am an idiot for talking to myself. I flip on the blinker and then poke on the radio. The sound of the Rolling Stones spills out of the speakers. I need some Jagger to get through the soreness in my legs and the fog of a couple beers too many. Those had come after the gym. At this point, I rarely drink, so after a few, I’ve reached my limit.
When I pull into the hospital parking lot, I drive past my sister, Nicole’s, vehicle. Thankfully, she doesn’t work in the ER at this hospital. I don’t want to have to explain myself to another sibling.
My boots thump on the pavement as I swerve past a nurse pushing an older gentleman in a wheelchair. The wheels of his ride bounce on the cracks of the sidewalk.
From behind me, I hear the man laugh and smack his leg. Happy old fart. What’s the over-under on whether I’m going to be happy after seeing Natalie? Shit. Probably not good after how things ended last night.
As I approach the window, she waves, and slides open the sliding glass. “Hey, Trey. Give me a second. One of the nurses said she’d fill in for me while I’m on break.”
“Okay.” I shove my hands in my pockets and pace back and forth without getting into anyone’s space. The ER waiting room is busier than the last time I’d been there.
She seems happy to see me. That’s good, right? Fuck. I’m a moron. Where in the hell did I leave my balls?
A little boy about four years old, glances up as I walk by. “Momma, he’s big.” His eyes are wide as if he’s seeing something that intimidates him.
“Sorry.” I nod my head at the boy’s mom and slow my pace. Stop coming on like a caged animal.
Finally, Natalie snaps the door open and joins me in the waiting room. “Let’s go back to the staff breakroom. It should be quiet, right now.”
“Good.” Thank God, I don’t want an audience while I blow chunks on the tips of my shoes.
She grabs my hand and laces her finger through mine. “Thank you for coming by. I didn’t think I’d see you until at least tomorrow.”
“I’m not going anywhere.”
She stops. “Good.”
My heart dives to my feet. Don’t get your hopes up. Or start blubbering in the hallway of the hospital. “Where to?”
“It’s right here.” She points to a door about four feet from where we stand.