Chapter 8
After the whole dramawith Roger and Carly Calder and I have settled into a nice routine. I’ve changed my schedule to match his, so we can spend as much time together as possible. I’ve been working on a novel in my spare time which isn’t often. Calder is occupying all of my free time these days but I’m not complaining. We are growing closer. If I’m not in his bed he’s in mine and more often than not the door separating our apartments stays open.
He’s asked me to meet his parents twice and I have declined. I know my worry over what I fled from is holding me back. I want to tell Calder the truth, but I’m scared. Even my name is a lie. What will happen when I tell him that I killed my ex-boyfriend in self-defense and ran from the scene of a crime because his drug dealing boss was coming to collect his money that I basically stole unknowingly. But once I did know I chose to keep it and I have been lying to him this whole time. I know what I need to do. I need to find out what happened with Chris. I have been pretending that it didn’t happen. Hiding away here in this perfect bubble with Calder but if I don’t tell him and he finds out on his own he will hate me more than he already will.
I’m going to tell him but not until I know if I really did kill my ex-boyfriend. I feel absolutely sick over what I have been doing but I am so deep in how do I now say oops I lied to you. My name is really June but everything about what we feel for each other is real.
I won’t be able to live with myself if I don’t come clean. I’m just scared to lose the best thing that has ever happened to me—him.
I only had to work a short shift today and told Calder I would meet him at home after I run some errands. He has the day off and is spending some time helping his mom do some stuff at the charity she operates. I’m at the library being a chicken shit. I’ve been sitting here for thirty minutes unable to type in the search terms for my hometown news channel. Afraid of what I will find.
I take a deep breath and lose my eyes as I type the words in. I take another deep breath and exhale out my nose. Okay. I can do this. I open my eyes and click on the top result. I search the archives, typing in my name and that’s when I see it. My name. There’s an article about me. I click on it and my picture pops up. It’s a missing person’s poster. All it says is that I went missing from my residence a few months ago and to contact the local police department with any information.
I’m about to type in a search on Chris but I am interrupted by Carly. She pops up on the other side of the computer and I quickly close the screen out hoping she hasn’t been spying on me. “Maggie, right?” She knows who I am, and I have no idea why she is trying to hold a conversation with me.
“That’s me. Is there something you need?”
“No, I thought I would give you a little piece of advice though.”
“There is nothing you have to say that I need to hear. I know you’re in love with Calder and that you want him back.”
“I will get him back. Calder was mine for years.” She sneers.
“Yeah until you fucked his best friend. He told me all about you and your pathetic attempts to weasel your way back into his life, but he doesn’t love you. He’s moved on and he’s happy. If you truly loved him, you’d let him go. Now if you’ll excuse me I need to get home. Calder is waiting for me. We’re having dinner tonight with his parents.” The part about dinner with his folks is a lie but he has been trying to make it happen and she needs to know that Calder has moved on from her.
She starts to say something, but I walk away. I have bigger things to worry about like who filed a missing person’s report on me. When I get outside the library Calder is waiting for me with flowers.
“What are you doing here?”
“I went by the diner to surprise you, but Luna said you were gone already, and I took a chance I’d find you here.” I accept the flowers and kiss him deeply, hoping that bitch walks out and sees us, but she doesn’t. “Don’t be mad but I was sent to fetch you. My mother wants to meet you and she said, and I quote either I bring you to the house for dinner tonight or she will bring dinner to us.”
“Tonight isn’t really good for me.”
His face falls. “What’s wrong?”
“I just ran into Carly in the library. She was trying to dissuade me from being with you.”
“Don’t let her get inside your head. That’s what she wants. To place doubt and come between us.”
I shake my head. “It’s not just that. There’s things about me that I haven’t told you, Calder and I...”
He pulls me into his embrace shushing me. “And I know that. You’ll tell me when you are ready but tonight I am asking for this one thing from you, babe. One dinner with my parents that is all I want.”
“You’re right,” I concede. What’s one more day of my lies? I’ll come clean with him tomorrow. “Can I change first?” I run a hand down my work attire.
“Absolutely but they will love you regardless of what you are wearing.”
Calder drives me home to take a quick shower but there is nothing quick about it and maybe I am trying to distract him and make us miss dinner because the door between our apartments is still open and I strip down with the bathroom door open knowing he’s watching.
I’m not in the shower two minutes before the curtain is drawn back and he’s joining me. Shivers course down my spine as Calder places his hands on my hips and kisses my shoulder. I lean back, pressing the back of my head into his chest. We’ve not had sex, but we’ve come close a few times. We both want it, but Calder insists that we take our time getting there. He says taking it slow is for my benefit, but I’m ready to make that leap which may be selfish of me considering I am lying to the man about my identity. I wanted to tell him, but he blew me off. Right now though all those thoughts fade away. I am only focused on this moment.
His erection is pressing against the small of my back due to our difference in height. He moves his hand to my front, fondling and teasing me. “Calder?” I whisper his name in a sultry purr.
“Yes, Maggie,” he says my name in a raspy tone that turns me on further.
“I want to be with you.”
“You are with me, you’re my girl.”