He reaches out and turns me back to look at him. “No, Ever, you don’t get it. I really like you and want to get to know you. I want to know everything about you. I want to be the man you run to when you are scared.” His words are all I’ve ever wanted to hear before, but I know the reality of my life.
I shake my head carefully in case it starts hurting again. I’m sure they gave me meds to help with the pain. That would explain why I’m strong enough to ask these questions and to touch him. I’d never do it without the medicated courage.
“You can’t save me, Rocco. I won’t allow you to get hurt because of me.”
He leans forward and kisses my forehead. “My beautiful Ever, I won’t get hurt.”
The door slams open and I jump up. My ribs ache and my head starts to throb again. My father is standing there with his attorney and another man I don’t recognize.
“Distonoli, out. Now,” the man orders, and I watch as Rocco stands slowly. He unfolds from the chair, his body tight and ready for battle. His hand comes to mine, and he takes it, holding tight but not trying to hurt me.
“I’m not leaving her,” he says, his voice gruff, his eyebrows dropped. “Every time I leave her something happens.”
“I’ll suspend you, Distonoli. You don’t want to go through that again.” I look at the man and realize how serious this situation is, but when I look to George, I see the glee in his eyes. This is what he wanted. Just like the teacher who wanted to help me and lost her job, Rocco will too. I can’t allow that to happen. I pull my hand from his.
“No, please leave, Detective Distonoli,” I say, and George looks at me with a smirk on his face. “Please leave, now.” I turn to focus on Rocco, who is glaring at me.
“I told you I’d help you,” he growls, but he doesn’t scare me.
“You can’t save me. I don’t need saving.” I look down to avoid his eyes, to avoid the anger and hate I’ll find there.
“You’re right, I can’t save you, because you don’t want to be saved.”
My heart breaks as he turns and walks away from me. Before he steps out the door, I look up at him and he turns to look back at me. The devastation and pain I feel is reflected in him by the slump of his shoulders, the way his lips tip down, and the way he slowly closes his eyes to avoid looking at me again.
“Detective Distonoli, here is a protective order filed against you. You can’t come within five hundred feet of any member of the Chambers family or you will be arrested.” Rocco yanks the paper away from my father’s attorney and storms out with the other man following behind him.
“Get dressed, we are leaving,” George orders, and I look down to see I’m in a hospital gown.
“Yes, sir.”
He steps out of the room, and I wait for the nurse to come in and remove the IV so I can get dressed and leave the hospital.
Not only did I learn about desire today, but I also learned about heartache.
* * *
Rocco
I move through the ER, away from her. I can’t save her if she doesn’t want me to. I thought she would want my protection, but instead she pushed me away. I slam through the exit out into the parking lot.
“Rocco,” my lieutenant barks my name. I stop, knowing he’s going to suspend me or slap me back down to patrol. Maybe it’s time for me to leave and go somewhere else. Do something else. I can’t outrun my past or my father’s transgressions. I’ll always live within those shadows, no matter what I do.
“Hey, man, I need to talk to you,” my lieutenant says, and I turn toward him. “You’re not going to get suspended. But I need you to step back from this. Something isn’t right in there and I want you to find out what it is. That’s an order from the Chief of Detectives himself. But we need to act like we are stepping back. This goes up the food chain. The commissioner wants to find out who is helping this man get away with this. It's obvious that poor girl didn’t fall down the stairs.” His words give me pause for only a moment.
“Find someone else. I can’t, you saw.” I nod toward the hospital.
“Yeah, I saw you getting close to the victim. I saw you getting involved. I need you to step back and do what I know you can do. Look at all aspects of this and find the key that will unlock this case. Take the night off, relax, and come in tomorrow.” His hand drops onto my shoulder. “Rocco, she’s so beaten down she’s scared of everything, but what I saw was a woman who thinks she is protecting you. Look for older reports that were closed. I bet someone else tried to help her and it backfired. She didn’t want to see you get hurt that way. Believe me, I know what I saw.”
I pause and think about everything that happened in that room again. He’s right though, as soon as he said he’d suspend me, she kowtowed down to George.
“If you hadn’t threatened my job, she would have been safe with us.” I glare at him.