I requested that the lilies be arranged in different colors to spell out 'Marry me,' framed by blue and pink roses, her favorite. I wasn't sure if she would notice it when we first got in or once we were seated and having the picnic, but either way, when she saw it, I was ready. Her eyes haven't left the ceiling, and her hand hasn't left her mouth. I see the tear slide from her eye, and suddenly I want to hyperventilate. What if she says no? I mean fuck, I don't deserve her by any means, but I will fucking worship her until my last breath. No! Bullshit. She has let me spill inside of her morning, noon, and night. She belongs to me, and she fucking knows it.
My Angel is in suspended animation, not moving or acknowledging my existence at the moment. I use it to move closer to her and down on one knee. Pulling the blue Tiffany's box from my pocket, I clear my throat. Her watery eyes meet mine, and she stumbles once more. My hand shoots out and grips her ass, anchoring her to the spot, cursing those damn heels right now even though I want to fuck her in them and nothing else with my ring on her finger. "Angel. Look at me." I can't read her right now, and it is making me insane. I never once considered that she would turn me down. Well, not until this moment. Shit. Maybe the idea sucks. Is it not romantic enough? Has she been simply biding her time until she can leave? Leave. The word is like acid on my tongue, threatening to seep into my blood and poison all my hopes and dreams.
"Julio. Come back?" I hear my name spill from her perfect lips and feel her hand on my face. Blinking, I see she is looking at me, concerned, and I feel like shit. Way to ruin the mood. "Where did you go?" she asks, still rubbing my face.
"Wondering if this is what you want? If I am what you want forever? Me and everything that comes with me."
"Are you asking me something?" When I see the smirk on her face, twenty pounds of steel fall from my chest.
"Fuck, Angel. I don't want to ask you anything. Jesus. I want to demand you wear my ring and that swollen belly I am trying to give you proudly every fucking day. I want to mark you, bruise you so everyone can see I own every inch of you, even what is in here." I say, touching her chest over her heart. "I want to fucking beat my chest that this perfect, sweet, smart, and sexy Angel wants anything to do with my demented ass, but I want this to be perfect for you. So, Lily, my heart, my light, my redemption, my wife. I love you more than I thought myself capable of. I worship you, adore you, and live to make your every dream come true. I promise to protect you and our family with my dying breath. Please put your trust, faith, and heart in my hands. Will you marry me?"
"YES!" She falls to her knees in front of me and wraps her arms around my neck. "Yes, Julio. I love you so much. I want to be your wife." My mouth kisses her in what is supposed to be a chaste celebration of our future, but like anytime any part of my body touches her, an inferno erupts. Her tiny tongue slides into my mouth, and our dance is in tune. We moan, suck and bite each other's mouth, hands frantically trying to remove all barriers from between us.
"Shit, baby. Let me get this ring on you." We pull back, both gasping for breath and trying to control the primal need to mate. Her glassy eyes look down as I slide the five-carat princess cut pink diamond on her finger.
"Julio, it is beautiful."
"I couldn't find anything to do you justice, but this was close enough." What? It's true. Nothing is as beautiful as my woman. Nothing.
TWELVE
LILY
THE NEXT DAY
I have been trapped between disbelief and daydreams for the last 24 hours. I still can’t believe that I am engaged to a man who sees me as the sunshine on his dreary day. I never dreamed I would find a love like this…so consuming and raw and filled with contentment. I know the life he lives is dangerous, and it puts me in danger by association, but you know what, I have never felt safer, loved, or heard.
When we pulled up to the Botanical Gardens yesterday, I was simply excited to go and spend the afternoon there. When I finally looked up, I couldn’t believe my eyes. There, spelled out in lilies, were the words, ‘Marry Me.’ I know I should have jumped up and down and shouted ‘yes,’ but I was stunned. Literally speechless. I couldn’t believe that what I was seeing was real. My mind knew I wasn’t crazy, but my heart was too busy doing somersaults and backflips, pausing to check my pulse and for proof of life that this wasn’t a dream.