“You’re not wrong about that.”
“And when you say it’s not an option, I’m assuming that isn’t in the literal sense. You’re a good-looking pilot. Options must be boundless.”
“No, I didn’t mean there weren’t any options. I meant I wouldn’t be taking any of the available options.”
“So it’s been what, a week now since you and Kendall spent the night together?”
“One week today.”
“And it’s been three days since you were here.”
“You want me to put this crap on a calendar for you?”
Dr. Lemmon smiled. “No, I think I got it now. Have you spoken to Kendall recently?”
“Just that one time I already told you about. When she called me.”
“What night was it when you spoke to her, again?”
What the hell was with this woman and her dates today? I thought back. I’d just landed in Florida from my Dubai flight when she called, so it must have been Tuesday. “Tuesday.”
“And you spoke for about an hour, if I recall correctly.”
“Give or take, yeah.”
“And how did you sleep that night?”
Let’s see. Kendall and I had spoken the entire drive home and then while I made a sandwich in my apartment. I’d woken up the next morning still in my uniform at almost ten. “That was my last good night of sleep. But I was tired from a long flight.”
“Did you fly yesterday?”
“I did.”
“For how many hours?”
“Nine.”
“And how many hours was the flight you were tired from when you spoke to Kendall that night you slept well?”
“About the same.”
Dr. Lemmon just stared at me.
“So you’re saying that I can’t sleep without talking to Kendall anymore?”
“I’m saying that the two are very likely connected. You’re feeling anxiety. Unsettled. Nervous. All of which is keeping you from sleeping. Is there any other reason for you to be feeling this way, other than how you left things after your encounter with Kendall?”
It annoyed the shit out of me that she was so right. “No.”
“Well there you go.”
“So what am I supposed to do? Call her every night so she can sing me a lullaby?”
“You already know what you need to do.”
“So what the hell am I paying you for if I already know all the answers?” I let out a frustrated sigh.
“You need to make a decision to either move forward with Kendall or cut ties. We talked about this the other day. I can help you sort out your thoughts and figure out your next steps, but only you can make the decision on whether to be with the woman you love or not. You have trust issues with Kendall. It’s understandable. She left you once, and you’re afraid she’ll do it again when things get tough.” Dr. Lemmon took off her glasses and rubbed her eyes. “Carter, Lucy had a disease.”