Chapter 19
Calland
I was torn between wanting to take her into my arms and tell her it was going to be okay, and throttling her for keeping this all a secret. Things would have been so much different if she just would have trusted me. I could have helped her and it all would have come to a head much sooner, rather than how it went down.
I was still pissed off, the mental image planted in my head of T.J. and Dani wrapped in each other’s arms lingering in my mind. Even though I know that it was nothing, that they’re family. Or maybe me being pissed off so bad stemmed from the fact that I was never the jealous guy. At all. And now the thought of another man touching Dani was enough to have me seeing red.
I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye, watching her twist her fingers together and wring her hands. I could see the anxiety on her face and it was killing me. Without another word, I reached out and dragged her into my lap, wrapping my arms around her and holding her tightly against my chest.
She melted into me, burying her face in my neck as a loud sob broke from her lips. She clung to me, her tears hot against my skin, soaking the neckline of my t-shirt, but I didn’t care. I knew instinctively that this break had been a long time coming, that she’d been holding back so much pain and uncertainty for so long.
That she accepted my comfort, allowed me to be the one to hold her while she cried? That just cemented the fact that I wasn’t ever letting her go.
When the sobs wracking her body had subsided into hiccupping little cries, I shifted, moving her away from my neck so I could see her eyes. I cupped her face in my palms, using my thumbs to gently wipe the tears from her cheeks.
“We’ll work it out, baby,” I said to her, softly.
She gave me a tremulous smile…not even really a smile at all, just barely the whisper of one, and nodded once.
“I know this is kind of a jackass thing to say, but is there anything else that might come back to bite us in the ass later? That I need to be aware of?”
She pushed away, getting up and pacing across the floor in front of me. I sat silently and watched, waiting for her to speak.
She finally stopped and looked me directly in the eye as she answered, “Probably. But I need you to trust me, because they’re not my secrets to tell. But they’ll probably affect me in the long run, you know, with the band thing and all. And…when I was talking to Alex on the phone?”
I nodded, encouraging her to go on, but a hole opened up in the pit of my stomach.
“He’s an ex…and he was part of the band, too. He’s been bugging me to get my brother and convince him to go back, to go on tour like we were supposed to. Everybody took a huge hit when the band split. We had to cover the costs of refunds for the concerts that were cancelled, and fees, and the money we’d been paid for the contract when we did the album…well. It was a mess. T.J. and I were the only ones that really could handle it, but only because we had a very sizeable inheritance left to us from our grandfather. We really didn’t broadcast that fact. I mean, hell, we both still worked. Not because we had to, but because we wanted to.”
She started pacing again. “Ever since then, though, Alex has had it in his head that we owe him something because of it. Blames the whole thing on T.J., but in reality, he’s most of the reason things went down the way they did. Now he acts like we’re all just going to pick up where we left off, in the music industry and personally.”
“Did you love him?” I found myself asking, though I dreaded the answer.
“I thought I did. At the time. But then he decided drugs were more important than anything else. I found him in bed with two women at a hotel we were staying at between shows. One was sucking his dick while the other sat on his face. He asked me to join, so I did what any self-respecting girlfriend would do. I smiled at him. Big, wide smile, lots of teeth. Sauntered over to them, got real close…and then dragged both of the skanks out by their hair, locking them into the hallway with no clothes.”
She grinned at me, then, and I laughed.
She shrugged her shoulders and finished with, “When he sat up and said it was cool, that he was okay with not sharing that night, I punched him in the face, kneed him in the balls, and left.”
I winced at that, my hands instinctively covering my own balls as I let out a low whistle. “Remind me again to never piss you off.”
The smile faded from her face. “There could be things that pop up. There WILL be things that come up. It’s only a matter of time, but I can’t tell you when, or why, or how. There’s a lot more to the story.”
I inhaled deeply, then blew it out before I said, “Dani. I don’t like secrets. BUT,” I said over her as she started to protest. “As long as I have your word that you’re mine, then we’ll take it as it comes.”
She just looked at me, her expression unreadable. “How can I give you my word when I still don’t know how long I’ll be here?”
“What the hell do you have to go back to?” I exploded, jumping up to pace the room myself. “Your brother made a life here, so why the fuck can’t you? You’re gonna just run off and leave Kaden here with T.J., and go back? To what?”
She scowled at me. “What’s here for me, Calland? Really? I left my house, my friends, everything back in L.A. to find my brother! Now I found him, and we’re gonna have to work things out, to try and get everything fixed so we know what the fuck is going on…so we don’t have to check the email every fucking day and try to put out the fires that might pop up and burn us!”
“I’m here!” I roared. “Your brother is here! Doesn’t that count for anything? How can you ask that?” I stopped in front of her, grabbing her shoulders and forcing her to look at me. “Tell me you haven’t been happy here. Tell me, Dani, and so help me God, you better make me believe it. If so, I’ll step back, let you pack up and high-tail your pretty little ass out of town without a backward glance. But if that happens, don’t think you can come strolling back into town later, thinking that everything’s gonna be just peachy. Because it won’t. Can you do that, Dani? Can you say that?”
A deep voice broke in from the front door area. “No. She can’t.”
We both whirled around to see T.J. standing just inside the door. “Sorry, the door was open and I could hear you.”
“Taylor,” Dani began, but he waved her off.
“He’s right, Dani. You said it yourself to me. You’re happy here, you can see why I’ve stayed. We have nothing back in L.A. The band is defunct, and I, for one, don’t want to resurrect it. There would be no point. Not without…you know.”
I looked over to see sadness sweep over Dani’s face as she nodded.
“But, I plan on staying here. You can see that I’ve got great friends. I’m happier working at Skin Deep, owning part of it with Brandon and Luke, being a part of something good for once, than I ever have been. And now, I’ll have my s-son here.”
He stumbled over the word son and Dani immediately crossed to him, placing her hand on his shoulder.
“Sorry,” he whispered to her. “It’s just so new…haven’t had time to get used to it.”