Chapter Eight
Sofia
“And then we had to go because Russell got called in for a work emergency, so we never got to talk or clear anything up,” I finish.
I’m sitting on Josie’s couch, glass of wine in hand, regaling her on what had happened with the guys the night before.
I hadn’t given her every dirty detail, but suffice it to say, I made it clear that I’d had a good time. But more than anything now, I was just confused.
“So what are you guys going to do?” Josie asks, “Are you planning to meet them again to talk this through? Is this some kind of long-term hookup thing, or-”
“No! I mean…it isn’t…right? Ugh, I don’t know what to think! I really like both of them. Damn you and your stupid algorithm,” I mutter.
She chuckles. “What can I say? I’m good,” she says, her tone laced with apology.
“I think I’m falling in love with them, Jo,” I say softly, tears stinging my eyes.
I hastily try to blink them away before she notices, but the attempt is both feeble and futile. “Oh, honey…” Josie sets down her wine glass before taking the one from my hand and pulling me into an embrace.
“I don’t know what to do, Josie, I’m falling in love with them both at once, and I can’t stop it and I can’t choose,” The dam breaks and the words pour out of me in a flood with my tears, sobbing into her chest.
“Shh, shhh,” Josie croons, stroking my hair, “It’s okay, it’s gonna be okay. Look, sweetie, maybe it doesn’t have to be like this.”
“What do you mean?” I ask, lifting my head and wiping damp strands of hair from my cheeks.
She reaches behind her for a box of tissues, offering it to me, and I take one, blowing my nose. “I mean…maybe you don’t have to choose.”
I scoff. “Yeah, right, I just get to keep two boyfriends. And what, make them my…what would you even call it, ‘brother husbands’ or something?”
She snorts. “I’m not saying you make them your male sister wives, but I’ve actually been doing some research. Come here, I want you to look at something with me.”
She takes me by the hand and leads me down the hall to her office, seating me in her desk chair and leaning over the computer. She taps away at the keys until she’s pulled up an article. The title, bold and blaring, says: “What Is Polyamory? The Mystery Of Multiple Mates, Explained.”
I furrow my brow in confusion. “What is this?”
“Just read it. And I’ve got others you can read, too,” she tells me.
And so I do. I read through the article, which describes a relationship practice in which either or both parties has additional partners with the consent of everyone involved. It describes a multitude of different kinds of dynamics, from one party having a bunch of partners to two people sharing a third partner…it seems to be an umbrella term encompassing a pretty broad spectrum.
To be honest, it wasn’t something that had ever really crossed my mind. I’d grown up on the traditional, fairy tale notion that there’s someone out there for everyone, even if I’d chosen to reject it for myself for a long time. But I’d never stopped to think that maybe for some people, their “other half” is more than just a single individual.
The more I read, the more sense it makes. Love isn’t some finite resource, just ask any parent of multiple children. Loving more than one person at once doesn’t diminish the impact of any of those loves.
“I’ve been reading up on this since your date,” Josie explains, “And actually, it kind of inspired me to add a new feature to MysteryMatch. There aren’t really any dating apps that cater to polyamorous people, so I’m adding a new setting called ‘Mix n Match’ for non-monogamous singles and couples.”
I shake my head slowly. “This all sounds great, but just because I want to doesn’t mean they will,” I protest, “I mean, it’s nice to know I’m not alone and all, but I just don’t know how it could possibly work out in the long term.”
“You don’t,” Josie agrees, “There’s no way you can know. Unless you try.”