I squeeze my eyes shut and rest my head against the cool tile of the shower, letting my orgasm roll through me. I release my dick and watch the last of my cum wash down the drain as my fantasy dissolves and the water washing over me turns to shame.
I can’t believe I went in her room last night, and I try to push away the thoughts of what I did to her. But they flood back, and my cock is hardening all over again, my first attempt at release useless.
I went in to check on her after Mom said she didn’t feel good. But when I got there, I stood beside her bed and watched her sleep. After a while, I went to the chair in the corner of her room and sat down, unable to leave her. I’d spent so much time trying to keep her at arm’s length, scared of what I might do if she got too close, so I wanted to soak in the moment. Simply watch her without having to worrying about anything, feeling calm at having her close.
My gaze traced every inch of her exposed skin, memorized every curve. The softness of her cheek and the way the light hit it. The creamy pale skin of her thigh that was sticking out from under the covers. The small birthmark shaped like a strawberry on the inside of her thigh that I’d see when she wore bathing suits. I sat there and remembered how I’d dream about what it tasted like, how it would feel to touch it, and if she grazed her fingers over it when she put her hands between her legs to touch herself.
I burned the image of her into my brain until she woke, feeling my eyes on her. I should have left right then, but I was weak. Looking at her for so long had broken down my resistance and I couldn’t walk away from her. So instead of doing what I should have done—and what she deserved—I turned off the light. I didn’t want to see the look on her face when I touched her. To face the rejection in the bright light. I knew what I was going to do from the moment I walked in the room, and I couldn’t bear to see the look on her face when I finally did it. I know my sister loves me, but she’s still my sister, and what I wanted to do to her was far from innocent.
“Stepsister,” I say through clenched teeth as I turn the shower off and reach for my towel.
I replay it all in my mind as I towel off and walk into my bedroom. I double-check that the door is locked and I lie back naked on my bed, reaching for the baby oil on the bedside table.
I put some in my hand and pray that one more orgasm will be enough to get me through the day. Once I’m alone tonight, I can do it again, but I need to somehow manage to keep my dick under control until then. Or I’ll be reaching for her again. I’d be lying if I said I haven’t thought of all the places in this house I could pull her into. Steal a few moments and no one would know.
Lubing up my cock, I close my eyes tightly and think about her little pussy rubbing on my cock. How needy she was for me, too—something I hadn’t seen coming. How she whimpered for it, and how my dick got my baby sister off. I should be ashamed of that thought, but it somehow gets me impossibly harder. My shaft grows with need as if I didn’t just jack off in the shower. I use my other hand to rub my balls as I think about the kiss and how fucking perfect it felt. Her bee-stung lips so soft against mine, how her tongue tasted like brown sugar.
She slept on top of me, but I never even closed my eyes. I petted her soft body like I would a kitten, and she purred on top of me. The feel of her soft skin so familiar, yet so new and undiscovered. My hard cock rested against my stomach, and her panty-covered pussy pressed on top of it as she slept. All I wanted to do was push them to the side and slip into her wetness. Take what I’ve always thought of as mine, even if I couldn’t have it. I knew I couldn’t take advantage of her like that, and fucking her sweet little cunt is something I don’t think we could come back from.
Maybe we could have this, our own little secret petting. Didn’t some siblings explore when they were kids? Is this so different? Only we aren’t little kids, and my feelings for her run far deeper. It’s not a brotherly feeling. But maybe we could have our moments in the dark and never tell a soul. It could be my one way of touching her but never letting it go too far.