She shifted in her seat again, uncomfortable from the hard boards digging into her behind. She felt a little giddy, her mind reeling the way it would when she stepped off a rollercoaster. Her blood felt warm, heated, as it flowed through her veins.
It felt almost wrong to feel this level of desire toward him. Not only because she was sitting in a backyard belonging to her ex-fiancé’s parents, though that was weird enough. But because she’d never felt a magnetic pull like this before.
All her life she’d believed relationships were about mental connections, about friendships that slowly grew into love – the way she’d fallen for Will. They were gentle, cerebral, and definitely not about animal attraction. And they certainly didn’t make your body feel as though it was being set on fire every time you connected with him.
Her desire for Lucas felt completely different, and she wasn’t sure what that meant.
She also wasn’t sure how much longer she could fight against it.
15
“Are you sure I can’t help you with anything else?” Ember asked. “I could bring in all the glasses while you wash them up. We could get everything cleared up a lot faster that way.”
Janice smiled at her. “Oh no, I wouldn’t dream of letting you help. You’re a guest, and guests don’t help clean up.” She glanced over her shoulder at her husband. “And anyway, Richard has everything under control, you know how much he loves doing the dishes.”
Ember raised her eyebrows. “Isn’t that the time he usually gets a call from one of his business associates?”
“Every time.” Janice laughed. “You know us too well.”
Ember wasn’t sure what to say to that. Another reminder that life had taken a ninety-degree swerve. She used to know them, she used to be one of them. And now? She wasn’t sure who she was becoming.
“I’m sorry, honey. I wasn’t thinking.” Janice touched her arm. “I hate this, I really do. Everything feels so awkward between us.” She sighed. “Did you see your engagement photo on the wall when you came in? I asked Richard to take it down weeks ago, but the damn fool forgot. I hope you weren’t too upset.”
“It’s okay. It really is.” Of course she’d noticed. It was the first thing she’d looked for when she walked through the hallway. She’d assumed it had been replaced, and her natural curiosity had made her check to see what photograph they’d hung in its stead.
And when she’d seen it? She’d felt as though she was looking at another person, another Ember Kennedy. She barely recognized herself. But shockingly, she hadn’t felt hurt or upset or any of the other things Janice clearly assumed she’d been feeling.
More than anything she’d felt nothing at all.
“When Will was growing up I read all these books about how to raise children and be the perfect parent, but none of them tell you how to deal with losing a daughter-in-law.” Janice lifted her hand to her chest, pressing her palm against her skin. “There are no etiquette books on what to do. I know, because I looked for one in Books By The Beach.”
Ember tried to bite down a laugh. Trying to find a book about this crazy subject was so very Janice-like. She took Janice’s free hand between her own and squeezed it gently. “You don’t have to know the right thing to do and say all the time. We’re fr
iends, aren’t we?” Strange how natural it felt to say it. Ember missed their relationship too much to let a guy ruin it.
“We are?” Janice visibly relaxed. “Oh, I would love to be your friend. That would be wonderful.” She leaned forward to give Ember a hug. “Thank you, honey.”
“Any time.” Ember hugged her back, breathing in her floral fragrance. “And I owe you an RSVP; I’ll be there at your party.”
“You will?” Janice’s face broke out into a smile. “Oh that’s great news. Thank you, honey. Now get out of here. It’s late and I’ve got lots of cleaning to do. I’ll see you at the fair on Saturday.”
* * *
The air outside was quiet as Ember slowly pulled the door closed behind her and walked down the steps to her car. The driveway was empty now. All the other committee members had left twenty minutes earlier, when Frank had finally called an end to the proceedings. The only vehicles left were her trusty old Toyota and the Martins’ much smarter, much bigger cars. Ember pulled her key from her pocket and unlocked the door, sliding her fingers under the handle to pull it up.
“Hey.”
She jumped at the shock of hearing a voice. The handle snapped back on her fingers, pinching her skin, and she pulled it out with a curse.
“You okay? Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.” Lucas stepped forward, reaching for her hand. He frowned at the white skin on the pad of her finger. “Does it hurt?”
She shook her head. “Just a pinch. It was my own stupid fault anyway.” She looked around, wondering if anybody else was here, too. He must have been waiting for a reason, right? “I thought you would have gone home by now,” she said when she saw nobody else there.
Lucas shrugged. “Frank caught me on the way out. He wants some help on Friday night. I said yes, but he then took fifteen minutes to persuade me anyway.” Lucas grinned.
“The man never says one word where five or six will do.”
“True story.”