Mac definitely wasn’t in there, and honestly, his face was the only one I wanted to see.
It always was.
And it had been this way since Dad died.
Or maybe longer. I’d known Mac since I was fourteen, but I had spent little time with him back then since he and Lachlan were always off traveling the world for Lachlan’s job as an actor, what with Mac being part of my brother’s security team. But I distinctly remembered the Christmas Mac spent with us when I was eighteen years old. I’d just started my first semester at Aberdeen University and was happy to be home with my family. Over the two weeks of that holiday, Mac and Lachlan stayed at Ardnoch, too, and I’d developed a crush on the older man my brother considered his closest friend. Mac was thirty-one at the time, and definitely not interested in his brother’s teenage sister. That didn’t bother me back then. I just loved having crushes because I enjoyed the butterflies and hyperawareness, the mooning and fantasizing. It was fun!
Love, however, love was not fun.
Love hurt.
And somehow, almost eight years after that crush developed, after Lachlan and Mac had come home to rebuild the estate, I’d fallen in love with Mackennon Galbraith. I was pretty certain he still saw me as Lachlan’s wee sister.
Which was why I’d gone all out on my appearance tonight. For once, I’d used a little of the inheritance I’d gotten from Lachlan when he sold land we owned elsewhere, and I bought myself a stupidly expensive dress, but it made me feel sexy. My job as a forest engineer meant I was forever running around the Highlands in jeans or walking trousers and comfy jumpers or T-shirts. For once, I wanted to show off my figure.
I moved through the receiving rooms that Lachlan had transformed for his guests into spaces where they could socialize, smoothing my hands down my dress as I searched for Mac.
Lachlan looked a little annoyed when he saw me earlier, but thankfully, he’d kept his mouth shut. As much as he wanted to keep me a wee girl, I wasn’t. I was a woman. Twenty-five years old, almost twenty-six, and capable of making my own decisions. Including wearing a long dress that made me feel a little naked. It was silk, fitted, and a pale icy blue that matched my eyes. If it had been embellished with lace, it could’ve passed for a negligee.
I wore my hair down and asked my stylist to lighten the blond to platinum. The effect made my eyes bluer, and I decided I loved it so much I’d forego an updo and style it with some waves.
Two Hollywood actors had flirted with me within the first hour of the party.
I rarely needed that kind of attention to bolster my confidence, but Mac wasn’t like any man I’d ever wanted before. For a start, I’d never been in love until now.
While Mac wasn’t the type of man to settle into a serious relationship, I’d seen the women he casually dated. He was a man of varied taste, so there was absolutely a chance he could be attracted to me. I’d never lacked for confidence or had self-image issues, mostly because of my upbringing. Who cared what anyone else thought? About anything! I’d grown up in a village where everyone knew your business, and the only way to survive it was to not give a damn.
Tonight was a braless night for me, and I gave zero fucks. The dress had thin spaghetti straps, and the silk fabric was so fine, I couldn’t wear a bra with it.
Okay. So it was a deliberate choice. I wanted to see if Mac would notice. Sue me.
It was difficult for him to notice, however, if I couldn’t bloody find him.
Wondering suddenly if he’d locked himself in his office, I shifted direction, avoided eye contact with guests, and disappeared down the Staff Only corridor.
Mac’s office door was shut.
I took a deep breath, rapped my knuckles against it in warning, and pushed inside.
Peeking my head around the door, I found Mac sitting on the armchair in his small office. He looked mammoth in the room that he’d filled with bookshelves. He turned, and my heart melted at the melancholy in his gorgeous eyes.
Without a word, I stepped inside and shut the door behind me. “Mac?”
His gaze drifted down my body, lingering on my breasts, and my breath caught as my stomach flipped with excitement.
But he scowled and looked down at the floor. “What are you doing here? You should be out enjoying the party.”
“With a bunch of people I don’t know?” I tutted and sat down on the edge of his desk. “No, thanks.”
He stared sullenly at the floor, and my chest ached with longing.
Most of the time, Mac was so charming it was difficult not to flirt outrageously with him. He had a wicked smile and always seemed to know just the right thing to say.
However, as I’d gotten to know him well these last two years, I witnessed him go through periods of brooding. Lachlan wouldn’t tell me what put Mac in these strange moods, but I desperately wanted to know. So I could comfort him. Soothe whatever hurt him. Like he and Lachlan had soothed me after my father died in my arms.
Tears pricked in my eyes at the memory, and I looked away. “What is it about New Year’s Eve that’s so depressing?”
A gruff snort drew my gaze back to Mac. Our eyes met, and my pulse throbbed.