Gray snorted, his shoulder moving beneath my hand with his amusement, but my anger toward Angeline turned inward.
Why the hell had I defended Mac?
That wasn’t my job anymore.
If it ever had been.
Not long later, I forced myself to be me again, and that meant forcing Eredine onto the dance floor with me, Lewis, Eilidh, and Jaz and Autry’s beautiful daughters, Jada and Asia. While Eredine held Jada’s and Asia’s hands, creating a circle where they all shimmied to Pharrell Williams’ “Happy,” I did the same with Eilidh and Lewis. It had taken some convincing to get Lew up because he was such a serious wee guy, so hearing his giggles as his kilt flew around him was the best sound in the world.
I laughed with my niece and nephew, finally feeling nothing but goodness since the day had begun.
“Can I join?” Regan bounced up to us, and I let go of Eilidh’s hand so Regan could enter our circle and then took her hand. I watched the way Eils and Lew turned their attention to Regan, their faces lighting up, adoration beaming out of them, and I unconsciously squeezed Regan’s hand. She’d brought so much love into their lives.
“You okay?” she mouthed.
“Just grateful for you!” I yelled over the music.
Regan grinned. “We’re family for real now!”
“We were before this,” I assured her.
She wrapped her arm around my shoulders and hugged me to her side.
Our circle soon merged with Eredine’s, and then Robyn was there in her beautiful dress, twirling Jada and Asia. Her interactions with the girls, the way they giggled “Auntie Robbie!” whenever she made a funny face or tickled them, reminded me she’d had a life in Boston. A life she’d partly sacrificed for my brother. That alone was enough to convince me she loved him.
Soon, we drew the attention of the men. First Lachlan, whom Eilidh pounced on. Her uncle hoisted her into his arms. She recently turned six, and I realized it wouldn’t be long before the days of being lifted easily into her uncle’s or father’s embrace would be over. It made me melancholy. I didn’t want the kids to grow up too fast.
Then Thane was there, making Lewis giggle harder as he shimmied ridiculously to the music. Brodan sidled up to Eredine to do the robot, and the kids immediately copied him.
Arran appeared and wrapped his arm around Lachlan’s shoulders, saying something to Eilidh I couldn’t hear over the music. She giggled, and Lachlan grinned at Arran. I missed this. I missed us all being together all the time.
All of us here, happy and safe, after a year of drama worthy of the big screen. We’d had stalking, murder, and kidnapping.
We deserved this moment.
But when Mac joined our circle next to me, holding on to my happiness was so incredibly difficult. His arm brushed mine, once, twice, three times … I tried to edge away, but he seemed closer than ever. To me, it seemed like he was using this moment to do just that. The music blurred into the background, my family’s joyful shouts of encouragement and amusement a buzz. All I could sense was him, all I could smell was his aftershave, and the memory of that night less than a month ago wrapped its hand around my throat.
I couldn’t breathe.
Breaking away from the circle, I slipped a little in my strappy sandals and had to right my balance. Pushing through the crowded dance floor, I burst into the corridor, trying to think, trying to orient myself.
Calm down, Arro.
Feeling trapped in my stupid heels, I leaned against the wall and practically ripped them off my feet, sighing in relief as my arches sank into the carpeted runner. I then hurried through the castle toward the library.
Unfortunately, a couple of guests occupied the library, so I moved on to Lachlan’s office. The door was closed but thankfully not locked. He didn’t use this as his actual office. We called it his “stage” office because it looked the part with its fireplace, twin, floor-to-ceiling windows, impressive library desk, and shelves filled with books. His real office resembled Mac’s.
Just thinking his name made me flinch, and I stumbled around the chesterfield sofa near the fireplace and slumped into it.
With no fire in the hearth, the room was cold, the hardwood freezing against my bare feet, but the chill cooled my heated skin.
The door clicked open, and I swiveled toward the sound. The room swayed a little as Mac slipped in and closed it behind him.
Nausea shot through me, and I never in my life thought I’d feel that way being alone with him. I pushed up to my feet. “What are you doing here?”
His eyes glittered with a million emotions. “Arro—”
“Get out.” I skirted the edges of the room. “Get out, Mac.”