“Judas Priest,” Verna said. “I never thought about lunch. I’m sorry, old man.” She paused at a stop sign and eased her way into traffic. “Soon’s we’re out of this blinking burg, we’ll stop, okay? Just let me get out of here, and we’ll stop the first place we see.”
“I’m hungry now.”
“Shh, Bernie,” Angel said. “She said she’d stop soon as she got out of town.”
Within a few minutes they were on the interstate, the pickup rattling in protest at the speed Verna was demanding from it. They whizzed past an exit that would have taken them into a big shopping area, past some farmland, and then mountains to the left and mountains to the right and trees everywhere. As soon as Bernie realized that there was nothing but trees on either side of the interstate, he started whining again. “I’m hungry. You said we’d stop.”
“Well, I will. There just ain’t any place to stop right now unless you fancy a maple leaf burger. Would you like that, huh?” Verna leaned across Angel and punched Bernie’s arm. “How ’bout a side of tasty French-fried bark, hey?”
“Don’t punch me,” Bernie ordered grumpily.
“My, my, ain’t you the bear. And I thought the bear was riding on the floor.”
“He’s just hungry,” Angel said. She was hungry, too, but Verna was more likely to pay attention to Bernie’s belly than to hers.
“Yeah, well, we’re all hungry,” said Verna. “Soon’s we get off the interstate, we can find us a place to eat. Promise.”
“You already promised,” Bernie said. “You promised soon as we got outta town.”
“You are a bear, ain’t ya? Well, let’s sing a song for a bear.” She began to sing:
“‘The bear went over the mountain,
The bear went over the mountain,
The bear went over the mountain,
To see what he could eat!’”
At “eat” she leaned across Angel and made as if to bite Bernie. He shrank back toward the window, but he was trying hard not to smile.
Verna grinned. “Okay,” she said, “all together now: ‘The bear went over the mountain...” Angel joined in, watching Bernie out of the corner of her eye. They sang the song over and over, always ending with the big bite toward Bernie, until his shadow of a smile broadened and he let out a giggle.
“That’s what I like to hear,” Verna said. “I like to hear my babies being happy.” She sighed. “Not enough laughing in this family. That’s for sure. Okay. Now. Let’s plan what we’re going to eat once we find a place. Me. I think I’ll have me a steak about as thick as a brick. How ’bout you, Angel?”
“I don’t know. Maybe a hamburger.”
“Just a burger? The sky’s the limit when you’re dreaming, girl. Better dream big.”
“Cheeseburger? With fries?”
“That’s better. What’s Bernie Bear ordering?”
“An elephant.”
“Wow. I don’t know if we’ll have time for an elephant. They take a while to cook.”
“A double bacon cheeseburger with giant fries and a milk shake—chocolate,” Bernie said.
“I shoulda settled for the elephant. Probably been cheaper.”
Bernie giggled again. “But you said—”
“Wow. I gotta be more careful. This mouth of mine is going to get me in trouble big-time!”
Bernie leaned around Angel and growled at Mama. “If you don’t watch out, the bear will eat you up.”
“Whoa,” Verna said. “I’m scared to death.”