I jumped up and down.
I was getting a job! Well, I had to have the interview first.
It may have been a small thing, but to me it meant much more than I could explain.
*~*~*
I was so nervous that night that I was oblivious to anything that was going on. I’d put Eli to bed and was now sitting in the kitchen. He kept my mind occupied from the time I had picked him up from preschool. But now that he was in bed, my mind ran rampant. I’d been so focused on whether I should phone the number that I had forgot I’d have to have an interview.
Max wasn’t home yet, normally I would be focused on what I had to have ready for when he walked in the door but today my mind was elsewhere.
What would I wear? I owned the bare minimum of clothes, I wasn’t sure I had anything that would be suitable.
Maybe I wouldn’t go.
If I went then I would be around people that I didn’t even know. I just couldn’t decide whether that was a good thing or a bad thing.
No. I needed to do this.
I jumped out of my skin when the apartment door slammed shut. I heard a thump on the wall and then he muttered something unintelligible.
“Where’s my woman?” he shouted.
“I’m in here, Max,” I said with a huff.
He pushed open the kitchen door and grinned at me. I knew that look, it almost always meant that he wanted to get laid. I’d have to lay there while he got off and I would disappear to my happy place. The upside was that he touched me in a gentle way, it was one of the few times that he would touch me like that.
But there were times he wasn’t gentle, it was those times I dreaded.
He stumbled forward, leaned against the kitchen counter and opened his arms.
“Aaah, come here, baby.” I stood and went to him, this was a delicate situation and I had to tread carefully. He reeked of beer and smoke.
His rough hands pulled me to him, grabbed the sides of my face and crushed his lips against mine. The taste was even worse, the stale beer mixed with mint that he used to mask the smell made me heave.
I tried to pull away, but each time he would ho
ld me tighter while he crushed me to his body. I needed to breathe clean air, the smell and taste was too much. His hands started to wonder down then landed on my butt. He pulled me even closer, I could feel his erection through his jeans as his fingers dug into the soft flesh, sure to leave bruises.
I gasped when he let me up for air, stepping back I moved out of his hold.
“Come ‘ere baby.” I moved further back, intent on warming up his dinner.
He tried to take a step forward, but just ended up slumped back against the counter. His face turned red, his fists clenched.
“Now!” he sneered.
“I’ll warm your dinner,” I said softly.
“I don’t want no fuckin’ dinner.” He adjusted himself. “I want you. Here.” He pointed to his erection.
I hesitated, just long enough for him to see. He narrowed his eyes at me, the air becoming thick with tension. I should have just gone to him.
Maybe he was right? I never did learn.
He shook his head, his green eyes darkening.
“You’ll never learn will you?” He didn’t slur this time. I furrowed my brow, he sounded a lot less drunk than he had only minutes ago.