“Blood pressure?” I interrupted, sitting down on the chair and rolling my sleeve up for her.
“You know the drill,” Dr. Ponts replied with a chuckle. “You’ll be glad when the baby is here and you don’t have to do this anymore.”
“I’ll be glad when the baby isn’t sitting on my bladder,” I told her, grinning. I may have been nervous about almost everything when it came to having a newborn baby, but I’d be happy when I could pee when I wanted and not every two seconds.
Dr. Ponts took my blood pressure, and with a nod, I knew that was okay too. She sat back behind her desk and clasped her hands on top of it, staring me right in the eyes. “It’s time.”
“Time?” I asked, frowning at her. “Time for what?”
“You’re just under six weeks from your due date, which means we need a solid birth plan in place.” She left
that hanging in the air, and I had no idea how to respond. I hadn’t thought I’d still be in Five Oaks to need a birth plan here. In the back of my mind, I imagined everything I’d seen that day was a joke, or maybe a cover-up, and Ford would come and find me. He knew about Curtis, which would mean he could have found me if he was still alive. But he hadn’t. He hadn’t found me, which meant he really was dead. Every day I was here, it drove the point home that things would never be the same, and I was afraid. Afraid to go home. It would be so different without him.
“I…” I bit down on my bottom lip and pulled in a deep breath, trying to center myself. “I don’t have a plan.”
Dr. Ponts nodded and smiled gently. I was sure she was trying to reassure me, but it was doing nothing. She reminded me so much of my own mom, which was probably why I was so comfortable around her. “That’s okay. We can work one out together.” She leaned forward. “All being well, you’ll have a natural birth.” I blinked at her, trying to take in every word she was saying. “When you think you’re in labor, you call me. I’ll give you my emergency line number.” She pulled a leaflet from her desk drawer and scribbled something on it. “Then I’ll come and examine you, and we’ll go from there.”
She handed me the leaflet, and I took it from her, not really taking in what it had on it. “What about pain relief? And…how will I know I’m in labor?” I gripped the leaflet harder, trying to not throw a thousand questions at her. The routine had been one I relied on, but she was changing it up with this conversation, and it was making my mind spin. “What will happen after you come to me?”
“You’ll know you’re in labor because you’ll be having contractions, or your water will break, or maybe both. If you’re not sure, I’d rather check you over and have it be nothing than to not check and have it be something.” She took a breath as a beep echoed in the office, signaling the front door opening. “In regard to pain relief, we can try to manage your pain until you get to the hospital, after that, they will explain your options in detail.”
She pushed her shoulder-length, dark-brown hair behind her ear and smiled, causing her eyes to crinkle at the corners. “And as for me, I’ll check you over, determine if you’re in labor or not. If you are, then we’ll call up the hospital and let them know you’re coming in.”
She stood, so I stood too. “If you have any more questions, you can call me anytime.” She moved around her desk to stand beside me. “In the meantime, you could take a look at some books in the library.”
So much information was going around and around in my head, and I wasn’t sure I was processing it. I’d read the baby magazines Leopold had delivered into the store, but that was about it, and I was starting to realize how unprepared I was. I’d stuck my head in the sand, and now was the time to research it to death.
“Call me if you need anything,” Dr. Ponts said and squeezed my shoulder. I nodded as I turned and walked toward the door, not able to say anything else because all I could think about was the actual birth. I’d briefly thought about what would happen when the baby was here, but I hadn’t factored in what I’d have to do before that.
I wasn’t really sure what else she said as I left because I was in a daze. A fog had descended, and for the first time since I’d come here, I had a purpose and a mission. My shift at the store was due to start in an hour, so I had time to go to the library, which was on the other end of Main Street.
I crossed the road and picked up my pace as I walked past the store and then the diner. I kept my head down because I knew if I made eye contact with only one person, I’d lose precious minutes. And as I walked inside the library and waved at Beryl, who was manning the main desk, I felt a weight lift off my chest. Knowledge was power, and I was ready to become the most powerful I’d ever been.
* * *
BELLE
My eyes opened, my body ready to be awake thanks to its new internal alarm clock. For the last ten nights, I’d woken up at three in the morning needing to empty the bladder the baby was pressed against. It wasn’t only annoying to have my sleep disturbed, but also an entire ordeal to get out of bed.
I’d taken to having a mountain of pillows with me as well as a comforter and an added blanket for when I was cold. I had one pillow to place my feet on to help with my swollen ankles, one for between my legs, and another one underneath my bump. Then there was the one I held to my chest, and finally, the two under my neck. The pillows took up more space than I did, but there was a method to my madness—a comfort method.
Sitting up with little effort was no longer in the cards, so I rolled to the side and disposed of two pillows on the floor, then heaved up into a half-sitting half-lying position. It took me longer to actually get out of the bed than it would to pee. By the time I was standing, I’d used up all of my energy and wanted nothing more than to get back into bed, but a few kicks from the baby had me moving out of my room.
I waddled past Curtis’ bedroom to the bathroom and sighed as I held on to the towel rail attached to the wall beside the toilet. At one stage, I debated taking a nap here, because at least that way I wouldn’t have to get back into bed and then out of it when I would inevitably wake up in another couple of hours. But it was the pins and needles in my feet that finally had me moving off the toilet.
I washed my hands and forwent looking in the mirror. It was bad enough when I wasn’t half-asleep, never mind in the middle of the night. Apparently, it was normal to have a little swelling on your face, and I didn’t actually mind it. It was the swelling elsewhere I hated. Mainly my feet.
Pulling open the bathroom door, I switched the light off and then started to walk back to my bedroom, but murmuring voices had me halting. I tilted my head to the side, trying to place where they were coming from, and stared at Curtis’ bedroom door. He hadn’t been at work tonight, which meant he was home. Or at least, I thought he was. I hadn’t heard him go out before I went to sleep, but maybe he had company over. Sandy from the diner did say they spent “alone” time together. So maybe it was her?
Frowning, I shuffled closer to his door and pressed my ear against it. It didn’t sound like the voice of a woman, but two men whispering back at forth—or at least, trying to whisper. I knocked gently on his door and whispered, “Curtis?” I didn’t know what I was expecting. Maybe he’d just fallen asleep with his TV on. After all, he did have the master bedroom. Curtis had insisted I take it when we’d first gotten here, but I’d declined, preferring to have a smaller space. Less space felt safer.
The longer I listened, the more I realized it didn’t sound like it was coming from his room, but through it. So I knocked a second time, and when I didn’t get an answer, I pushed the door open. His bedside light was on, but Curtis’ bed was empty, the comforter pulled aside. And more importantly, the voices were now louder. I squinted to try and see through the dim light. The TV was off, and the sliding door, which led out onto a small balcony, was ajar.
I hadn’t thought about the sliding door to his room…and it was only then that I realized there were more entry points to the cabin than I’d first realized. When we’d first come here, I hadn’t even thought about it at all because I’d been thinking about the past. A past which I was sure wouldn’t have followed me, not after I’d taken all the necessary steps to disappear. But now I was so much more aware of it all. Maybe it was because I was starting to understand the temporary situation we were in was slowly becoming permanent with my due date fast approaching.
I understood that it didn’t matter how far I went, I would always be Belle Easton. I would still be the daughter of a DEA agent, and I would always have a child whose father had died. I didn’t have the protection here that I had at home, and it was like a smack in the face that had my legs wobbling as I stumbled to the side.
I stood there, my feet glued to the spot as I tried to listen to what was being said. A shadow moved from outside, followed by a second one, and my eyes widened. Someone was out there with him. But why were they out there in the first place? Part of me wanted to retreat, but the part of me that was inquisitive wanted to move closer and try to make out what they were saying. I could only imagine what Ford or my dad would have done if they’d have been here. There was no way they’d have shied away. They’d have moved forward and found out who it was and what they were doing here.