“I have no idea,” I say. “Maybe I have been in love with her forever.” I start to pace. “But it came crashing to me when she finally moved to Dallas.” I glance at him to see if he looks at me with disgust, but he doesn’t. “I don’t know. It’s like one day I’m sitting there and all these things are going through my head. I don’t want to even be in my house anymore. I feel like my skin is going to crawl off me and then she calls and it’s just in front of my face. I’m not happy because she’s so far away from me. I’m not happy because she’s starting her life, and I’m afraid she’s going to find someone who she is going to grow old with and …” I stop pacing and look at him. “And the thought of her being with someone else shattered everything in me.” I put my hands on my hips.
“Dylan,” he says, looking at me, and I know he’s trying to tell me how crazy this idea is.
“Dad, everything that I think of has Alex attached to it. Every single memory I have is of her in it, and when I think of a wife or mother for my kids, there is only one person who I see by my side.” I swallow. “If I can’t have her, I don’t want anyone else.” I put my hand to my chest. “Just the thought of her not being with me … I can’t breathe.”
“If you really, truly love her, then follow your heart,” he says, looking down, folding his hands together. “But, and this is a huge but, be fucking sure.” He shakes his head. “It’s not just you and her.” He lets out a huge deep breath. “It’s the whole family that is going to be involved in this, so you have to be one hundred percent certain.”
“Do you think I would do this without being one hundred percent certain, Dad?” I ask. “This has been eating at me.” The tears come to me. “What do you think they will say?”
“I have no idea.” He gets up, coming to me and taking me in his arms. “But we will find out together.”
Chapter 17
Alex
The sound of a baby crying fills the cabin as the air pressure starts to change. I look out the window at the darkness outside. I left in the dark, I arrive in the dark. Closing my eyes again until I hear the captain’s voice come on. “Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Dallas/Fort Worth Airport.” My eyes flicker open. “The local time is eight twenty p.m.” I look out the window as he tells us all to remain seated until the seat belt sign goes off.
I get up when I hear the ping, grabbing my carry-on and walking out of the aircraft. My whole body feels numb and I’m even afraid to look at myself in the mirror. I walk down the carpeted walkway following the signs to baggage claim.
Keeping my head down as the hustle and bustle of the airport just floats around me, I keep my sunglasses on so no one will see my puffy, red, bloodshot eyes. I spot the carousel number on the screen and make my way over, standing right beside it. Walking to it like I’m a robot. My body is numb as I go through the steps to get out of the airport. This whole day has been one motion after another, yet the pain in my chest grows stronger and stronger.
The burning in my eyes each time I blink hurts more and more. That and the fact that I’ve been up for over thirty-six hours.
When I ran away from Dylan on the beach, I rushed into Michael’s villa. The tears came nonstop and all I could do was pray he wouldn’t follow me. Jillian and Julia were both lying on the couch watching television when I barged in. Jillian looked over, unsure as to what was happening, while Julia immediately took one look at me and sat up. “I told him” were the only words I said before I had to put my hand to my mouth. To stop the sob that had been creeping up the whole time I told him everything. It took Julia one second before she took over, that is when everything flew into motion. She ordered Jillian to take me into her room and then she rushed out of the villa and she returned five minutes later with all my stuff packed.
Jillian watched me sit in the middle of the bed not saying anything because I was on my phone the whole time. I had booked myself onto the next flight out of there. She also had no idea what was going on nor did she get a chance to ask me any questions because Michael came in and we had to keep him out of Julia’s room. “Tell him I’m sick.”