13
Chapter 13
Paisley’s POV
I feltlike I was soaring on air as I walked back to my hotel room for a second time, this time with Jake holding my hand. It took us quite a while to get back because we had to stop every so often to make out—we just couldn't keep our hands off of each another. It was electric.
I had been thinking that the end of Claire’s Las Vegas residency would be a good thing because it would take me away from the confusing choice that I didn't want to make. But now, Jake had opened my eyes to yet another possibility. A harem. Me with all four guys. It was wild. Not unheard of, of course. Many people were changing the thought of what a traditional relationship was. I could be a part of that.
Sure, I might not have ever considered myself a part of that, but now I couldn't stop thinking about it. Why not do what made me happy? Even if it might confuse other people. I wasn't totally set on any decision just yet, but it was nice to consider options. It didn't have to be the end of the best time of my life.
"Tonight has been amazing," Jake insisted as we reached the lobby of my hotel. The place where the part of the night I'd spent with him began. How crazy. In such a short space of time, everything had changed. "Thank you so much."
"No, thank you." I brushed my finger down his cheek, honestly not quite sure if I was ready to let him go just yet. But we had work in the morning and really did need some sleep. "I had a wonderful time. It was just fantastic."
He brushed a stray strand of my hair out of my face. "Well, like I said when we were at the Eiffel Tower, I really do want to be with you, in whatever way you want us to be together…if you want it at all. I am also more than happy to give you the time and space you need to work this out. I know it's a lot. I know you need time."
I smiled gratefully at him. "You don't know how much that means to me."
I held on to his hands for a couple of moments, staring dreamily in to his eyes. There was so much that I wanted to say to Jake but I had to be careful not to say too much so I didn't give him hope on the off chance I would change my mind.
Although right now, as I was soaring higher than air, I couldn't imagine anything in the world bringing my fantasies to a halt. I lifted up onto my tiptoes to kiss him some more, just one last time to think of as I went to sleep. It was almost painful to break apart and to back off into the elevator. I didn't want this to end.
But now, it might not have to. I had to keep that in mind.
Once I was in the elevator, I leaned my head back on the wall and smiled to myself as I ascended through the building. Thank goodness I was alone. I didn't need anyone else to witness my blissfully happy moment. But this was heavenly for me. I never knew I could be so happy. Especially when I thought about how disastrous my love life had been before. But that was all so I could be here now. I was sure of it.
If I had ended up with any of those lowlifes, I wouldn't be as happy as I was right now. I wouldn't have the possibility of four men in my life.
All of a sudden, it hit me that all four guys might not want me in the same way. Just because I kind of liked the idea of a harem, didn't mean they would too. Sly was a strong and powerful character. An alpha male. Just because it was in his wolfy DNA didn't mean he would necessarily be all for it. Just because Jake agreed, didn't mean Ollie would. He could be hard to read, so that was going to be a real challenge. And then there was Vinnie. I liked him a lot, and I got the feeling that he liked me too, but nothing had ever happened between us. Not even a kiss. There was certainly no hint that he would want to be in my harem.
My heart was hammering. I might have been tired only moments ago and ready to sleep, but now I was wired and a little crazed. My head was spinning and I didn't know what to do. I wished there was someone I could talk to.
"Claire?" What the hell? What was my sister doing in my room? I blinked a few times to check that I wasn't dreaming, but there she was, spread out across my bed like she didn't have a much bigger room herself. "Are you okay?" I flopped down on the bed beside her. "What are you doing here?"
She flipped onto her front and grinned. "I came to get some advice from you, but you weren't here. Then I found your book of fashion designs, so I took a look through them. I hope you don't mind."
"Oh, you did?" Why did that make me so freaking nervous? "And?"
"And?" She pushed up in to a sitting position. "Paisley, you are so talented. Honestly, I'm blown away. You've never shown me these before."
Heat hit my cheeks. I'd always been so shy about my work in case people didn't get what I was doing, but it seemed like I didn't need to be. "Thank you."
"If I get some further opportunities from this residency, which Daisy thinks I definitely will, then I would love for you to design all my stage outfits."
My heart began to really race now. "Really? I don't want you to feel like you have to do that just because I’m your sister."
"I don't," she insisted quickly. "That isn't it at all. I know you wouldn't expect that, which is why you haven't shown me all of these designs already! But I want to. I really want to. I think you're super talented."
I threw my arms around her and hugged her tight. In that moment, appreciation surged through us both. We both realized just how much we meant to one another. I was so glad to have my sister. Truly.
"You have helped me so much," Claire muffled in to my shoulder. "I want to do the same for you. But not because I feel like I owe you anything. Because I want to." She eventually pulled back and looked at me. "You haven't told Mom and Dad much about your fashion dreams either, have you?"
"When I try, they think I'm just wasting time," I offered, a little sadly. "I don't think they see it as a real career. They don't say it aloud, but I don't think they assume I'll go anywhere with it. That makes it hard to talk about."
Claire rolled her eyes. "Yeah, they thought the same thing when I started singing. Now that I've actually made something of it, they're all up in my face about letting me know how supportive they are."
"I thought they'd always been supportive."
"Not at all." Claire shook her head. "But it's fine, really. And you'll be fine as well. You don't need their support to do well, because you have mine."
I wiped away the tears I didn't even know had started falling and laughed. Claire joined in and soon we were giggling away like crazed school girls. Honestly, my head was absolutely spinning, this was such a weird night.
"Oh, wait." I grabbed on to her arm, suddenly realizing something. "You didn't come here to talk to me about designs, though, did you? You came here for my advice. What do you need my advice about?"
I honestly couldn't imagine what advice Claire could need from me. She'd always been the sister who had it all together while I always felt like I was trailing behind, just trying to catch up as everything fell apart around me. But maybe my view wasn't exactly the right one. Perhaps Claire had her own view point.
She pulled up her cell phone and showed me a picture of a guy I vaguely recognized but couldn't figure out where from. Nor did I have any idea what any of this meant. It was just a picture of a man.
"What do you think?" By the time I glanced back up at my sister, she had adorably pink-stained cheeks. She was almost embarrassed by something. "About him. Do you think he's good looking? Do you like him?"
"I… do. Why?" I raised my brows in shock. "Do you like him?"
"Yes. We've been talking for a while and even been on a couple of dates. I think I might really like him, Paisley. He's interesting and sweet. Plus, as an actor, so he understands the entertainment industry well."
That's where I know him from! Movies. I might not have been able to figure out which one right then, but I definitely knew him from somewhere.
"Wow, Claire, that's amazing. You really like him, huh? How has this all happened and I haven't known a thing about it."
"I think you might have been a little distracted yourself, Paisley." She cocked a knowing eyebrow at me. "I'm not going to keep asking which one of them you like because you're being all quiet about it for some reason, keeping him a secret, but I know there's something going on with one of the guys."
I parted my lips a little, almost spilling the beans but not quite managing it. Yet again. This was definitely something I wanted to talk to Claire about, but I needed to make up my mind first. I didn't want to cause an uproar when I wasn't settled on a decision yet. Nothing might even happen, so best to keep my mouth shut.
"Like I said to you before, there's nothing going on." I offered her a one-shouldered shrug. "There can't be anything going on because once Vegas is over, that's it."
"Does it have to be?" Claire asked. "I don't think it does. I mean, the only reason I met Theo is because we're both here at the same time. Me doing my residency and him filming his latest movie. It isn't going to be easy for us after this, but I also don't want to give up. I want to see where things could go."
"Huh." I nudged Claire playfully in the side. "When did you get to be so wise?"
"Oh, I've always been wise, I just didn't realize it until now."
We fell back on the bed, laughing together. Just as Jake had done, Claire had opened up my mind to endless possibilities. The future didn't have a line for me to go down after this anyway. I wasn't totally sure what I was going to do, I was mostly just focused on the idea that I needed to get my fashion career off the ground. But now, there were all sorts of paths opened up to me, and I could choose.
I could carry on with what I had planned before. I could maybe try to get in touch with Bennie to see if he could help me with my fashion career, even if I hated his guts and didn't want to talk to him ever again. Or I could use Claire as my model and try to get my name out there that way. Maybe I could even just do it all on my own. Start from the bottom rung and work my way up.
Or maybe I could consider one of the guys, think about what a future might be like with them. With Sly, it would be heady and passionate, every day would be crazier than the last one. There would be fights, but the making up would be hot as hell. I'd certainly be protected, and every day would be an adventure.
With Jake, I would never stop laughing. We would seek out the fun in every single day together. He brought out the fun side in me as well, which not many people could do. I would miss that if I didn't pick Jake.
Ollie, sweet, sultry Ollie. He didn't need to say much for me to know how he was feeling. He was such a great listener, and the way he touched my body was crazy. No one had ever made me feel like he did.
Then again, if I didn't ever get to kiss Vinnie, I would lose my mind. His sense of humor was wonderful, and his empathetic nature was amazing.
Oh God, this was just so hard. I could not imagine just the one of them. I couldn't picture life without all of them. Which only left me the option of a harem.
I turned on to my side to see Claire so asleep she was practically snoring. Not that I was planning on asking her anyway, because I still wasn't quite ready to hear her advice, but I couldn't ask her now. I was going to have to work it out on my own. I suppose that was probably for the best anyway.
So, I took a moment to think, to really think, about what it would be like if I entered into a harem with them. I would get all aspects of all guys. All the qualities I so desperately wanted would be there. But there would be complications too, right? Just because the woman Jake and I saw at the fountains and her harem made it look simple and kind of amazing, didn’t mean it would be that way for me. Logistically, it could be crazy.
“Don’t forget they are wolf shifters,” I whispered to myself, as if I needed the reminder. "That's something to consider as well."
Every full moon, I would have to be very aware of that. Not that it would be a problem, but it was a factor to take into consideration. I knew some about shifters, and the guys had told me a lot as well, but clearly there was still a lot to learn. Like what Jake had explained to me about the harem tonight. I still had a lot that I needed to figure out.
Although, was that different from any relationship? That was a big part of the whole "getting to know one another" stage of dating.
Actually, that wasn't what worried me at all. All I could really think of was what it would be like if we were all together. Together, together at the same time. I knew that was how a lot of harems worked, and that was a little intimidating.
All that attention, all that chemistry, all at one time. Would I be able to handle it? Would they all be able to handle me? Oh God, it was a lot to think about.
I knew I wasn't going to get any sleep, not now. And it wasn't just because of Claire's snoring, it was because of all the possibilities floating through my brain instead. I couldn't turn off my thoughts no matter how hard I tried. Sly, Ollie, Vinnie, Jake…they consumed me. Even more than my fashion designing had always consumed me. I needed a distraction. Or maybe I needed to spend time really thinking it through, even if the thoughts were driving me insane.
I slipped off the bed and paced around the room for a little while, before a bright idea came to me. Perhaps I could really do something to make this time useful, to calm down my racing thoughts. I dove into my suitcase and grabbed the material I wanted to use to create the dress for Claire. After all, the residency wasn’t going to last too much longer and I needed it to be ready for the very last show.
It was a good idea. Focus on what needed to be done first for my career, and then work out what I was going to do with the guys. Hopefully I would have some light bulb moment where everything would become clear.
Now wouldn't that be perfect?