I had covered for her earlier, pretending I’d been missing Carter as I watched the two¸ but now, my eyes narrowed. Maybe it was her. She was missing her boyfriend. Then I thought, fuck it for the second time that night and prepared to go in.
“You’re still seeing him?” I began.
She leveled her eyes on me. “What?”
“You know what I’m talking about.” I raised my chin and squared my shoulders. This was going to be talked about, whether she wanted to or not. “You’re still seeing him?”
“Was I supposed to break up with him?”
I ignored that. “You haven’t told Theresa?” I knew she hadn’t.
Her eyes narrowed. “Where is this going?”
“You’re not a nasty bitch.”
Her head reared back slightly.
“But you’re acting like one right now,” I added, holding steady.
Her mouth fell open, just a little bit. “Excuse me?”
“What’s your problem? And don’t lie to me. You might be living with Theresa, but I know you better, and I know you’re not like this. What’s going on?”
“Who do you think you are—”
I cut her off, shooting forward so I was halfway across the table and almost in her face. “Your friend. Your family. That’s who I am.”
“And you? What about you?” she countered.
I sat back, frowning. “What about me?”
“We’re all in this mess because of your guy. He’s in the mafia—”
“No, he’s not.” He was.
She rolled her eyes. “Stop, Emma. He still is. You’re the only one trying to fool yourself into believing he’s out. Theresa’s so scared that something will happen to you because of him.”
“I went to him. I did. Because of Mallory. Because of what I had done. Me. He didn’t pull me into this life. Remember that.”
“But you’re still in, because of him, and where is he? You two hardly go a night without seeing each other, and Theresa told me he hasn’t been around since they got here five days ago. Where is he, Emma?”
I couldn’t answer that. All I could do was shake my head. “This wasn’t a problem before.”
“No,” she sighed, losing some of her fight. “That’s the thing. You’re not leaving him. No matter what, we all know that’s the bottom line. You’re tied to that life, and that means we’re tied to it, too.”
“Noah is friends with Carter, too—”
“But he would pull away. For Theresa, he would pull away. It’s one of the reasons she’s scared to move in with him, because of his connection to Carter.”
I stopped. Amanda’s response was so quick. She was so certain, and there was truth in that statement. I saw it on her face. She wasn’t looking away. They’ve talked about it. I sat back, blinking a few times. It made sense. Theresa had confided in me about Noah. Amanda confided about her new boyfriend. I shouldn’t have been surprised that they’d confided in each other about me.
“Theresa didn’t tell me that,” I murmured.
Amanda shrugged. “There are other reasons, I’m sure, but I know that’s one of them.”
“Noah said that?”
She nodded. “He said that to her one time, and she told me. He’s already pulled away from Carter. Haven’t you noticed?”