As we wait, the husbands all return for lunch, too.
I get to meet Alice’s husband, and even though Faye doesn’t have one, she’s so happy to talk to everyone else’s. She is at ease and doesn’t seem uncomfortable. I introduce Ronnie to all of them, and then the two of us join everyone for lunch. Enzo watches me as I interact with Ronnie, and his eyes scan over him, no doubt trying to gauge what sort of person he is. I give him a small smile, which he returns, but that’s as far as our interaction goes.
“Want to go for a stroll?” Ronnie asks after lunch. “Feels like it has been ages since we’ve caught up?”
“I do,” I say, missing my best friend. “Let me just see if Faye can keep an eye on Hudson.”
“I got him.”
Enzo’s voice comes from behind us, and I turn around to see him standing with Hudson by his side. “We’re goin’ to feed the horses.”
“Oh,” I say, heart racing at the sudden appearance. “Oh, well that will be nice. Shit, Ronnie, this is Enzo. Enzo, this is Ronnie. Hudson’s dad.”
The two men shake hands.
“Got to thank you for what you did for us,” Ronnie tells Enzo.
He doesn’t say anymore because Hudson is there, but Enzo gives him an appreciative nod, knowing exactly what he’s referring to. Them saving our asses from Joel. I’ve told Ronnie a few things about Enzo, but nothing too in depth, just that we’ve been having fun. Ronnie and I share everything, it has always been the same.
“I’ll see you when we’re done with our walk,” I say to Hudson. “Listen to Enzo, okay?”
Hudson nods and the two of them disappear. Ronnie and I go down to the lake to take a walk. I’m so full from lunch, I’m doing more a waddle than a walk.
“That man is into you in a big way,” Ronnie says, finally bringing up the giant elephant that has been in the room all day.
“It’s complicated,” I murmur.
“Why?” he asks, pausing so he can turn to face me.
“Firstly, because I have a son, and you. Secondly, because I don’t live here. Thirdly, I don’t know him that well. When this retreat ends...”
“Why can’t you explore that? He seems like a good man; he saved your ass.”
I purse my lips. “How am I supposed to explore it? Even if I did, and it went well...then what?”
Ronnie grins. “You know I go where you go, June.”
I roll my eyes. “I can’t move for every relationship and expect you to follow.”
“You haven’t had a relationship since Joel, so I’m not worried about that. Besides, I met those guys from the club today in town. They are looking for another mechanic. I could get a job here tomorrow.”
I blink. “You’d move, just because I wanted to explore a relationship?”
“Not right away. I’d want to know it was something worth moving for, but yeah, I’d move for you.”
My eyes burn with unshed tears. Ronnie looks down at me, placing his hands on my shoulders. I don’t know what I did right in this world to deserve him, but I do know that I’m so very grateful.
“You’d honestly change your life for me, why?” I croak.
“Because I’ve watched you change your life for everyone else. I watched what you went through with Joel, I watched what you did to protect Hudson. The entire world has been about everyone else and now you’ve found someone that could just make you really fucking happy. I know you’ll put it aside if you can’t find a way to make it work, even if it hurts, because that’s the kind of person you are. I can’t watch you live that life.”
I bite my tongue to try and stop the crying. “I’m not certain what I did right in this world to deserve you, Ronnie, but I’m so thankful.”
“You gave me Hudson, that’s what you did right. It’s me who owes you, not the other way around.”
I throw myself into his arms, tears flowing forth and running down my cheeks, because I can’t hold them back a single moment longer.
Ronnie hangs onto me, just as tight.
I’m so lucky.
God, if he only knew just how much I love him.
I’m blessed.
19
I lay beside Enzo that night, our bodies entwined together after a long, passionate sex session that had my knees shaking. There is something about Enzo that just brings out the best in me, and after talking to Ronnie, I know I have to mention what’s going to happen when I leave. I can’t let another second go by without knowing what is going to go down.
“Can I talk to you about something?” I ask, tipping my head back so I can see his face.
He looks down at me, his eyes sleepy. “Yeah, what is it?”
I hesitate. I don’t know how to start this conversation, but I do my best.