But I have a plan, and I’ll show her what I have in mind.
I have no other choice at this point. The only other choice is to give her up, and that’s not something I’m willing to do. I fought death and lived to tell about it and might face it again, but I’m beyond the point of caring. I love this woman with everything I have. Everything.
And if they fault me for that, they aren’t who I think they are.
I lift my cell phone and make a call. Romeo answers on the second ring.
“Jesus, brother,” he says. “Like getting a call from death’s door.”
I can’t help but snort. “Death’s door says we need to talk. Tomorrow morning, war room.”
“Got it.”
Rosa’s brows rise in surprise. “Did you just tell Romeo what to do?”
I shrug, then wince. Damn, forgot how much that hurt. “What if I did?”
“Getting bold, Santo,” she says with a sad smile.
“I almost died, babe,” I say softly. “I don’t fucking care anymore. Now help a guy outta bed, will you?”
“You supposed to get out of bed?” she asks warily.
“If I’m gonna do what I have to, it’s the only way.”
She still looks nervous, but takes my hand nonetheless. I brace myself on her shoulders and push myself to standing. Pain radiates from damn near everywhere, but I push through it. I grit my teeth and breathe more rapidly, rising above the pain. Welcoming it. I imagine I’m being hammered in fire, refined and perfected through the pain of it all.
I wasn’t raised to be a fucking wimp, and I won’t start now.
“Go,” I tell Rosa. “I’m gonna shower. Get myself out of bed. Don’t give anyone a reason to suspect why you’re here so much, and join us in the Great Hall tomorrow morning, got it?”
“Santo…” her voice trails off and she shakes her head. “Santo, I…”
“Rosa.” I pull her to me and grip her waist for support. It takes all the energy I have. “I’ve never needed you to trust me so much in my life. It’s crucial.”
“But Santo, you heard what I said—”
“I heard what you said, and I did what I had to, yeah. I’ll do what I have to, yet. But for now, I need you to go, and I need you to do what I said.”
She squirms uncomfortably, as if nervous to let me go. I fix her with a stern glare.
“And if you don’t, when I’m better enough to swing my arm, your ass feels my palm, woman.”
She bites her lip and heeds the warning. “Alright, alright,” she says. “Going.” But before she leaves, she lifts her head to mine and kisses my cheek. “God, a girl doesn’t know how bad she misses bossy until he’s back.”
“And a girl doesn’t know how bad she needs to be dominated until she’s splayed out beneath her man, ass bright red and welted, under his total command.”
“Oooh,” she breathes with wide eyes. “If you need me, call me.”
“I will.”
I give her a chaste kiss on the lips and send her on her way. I’m not gonna call her, not tonight. I have to do what I’ve planned.
The next morning is a bright, sunny morning that gives me hope. I don’t believe in omens, and I don’t believe in good luck. I believe people either work their asses off to get what they want, or they don’t. And I also believe I have the choice to be the person that does.
The calls I make are painful. It’s a matter of signing away a part of who I am to become the person I’m meant to be. Rosa will cry when she learns the truth, but I have to do it.
I have to.
The deals go faster than I expect, thanks to the Montavios and a few other connections I have. When the clock strikes eight, I rise and ignore the flare of pain along my side and belly. I toss a few more painkillers back and swig them down. Marialena hooked me up with the good stuff, the little brat.
I’m thankful.
I head downstairs and hear stifled gasps of surprise from the local guards.
I ain’t supposed to be out of bed yet, but I’ve got shit to do.
Everyone’s in the Great Hall, and I mean everyone. Sergio and Ricco and Timeo, chatting with Mama and Nonna. Romeo and Vittoria, Orlando and Angelina, Marialena and Mario with Natalia and Rosa. I feel her eyes come to me, but I don’t look back. I need her to stay strong.
Nonna hugs me and Mama plies me with food, fresh-squeezed orange juice, and coffee, but I don’t eat much of anything. My nerves are on fire, adrenaline coursing through me.
“We’re going shopping today,” Sassy tells me with a grin.
“The hell you are,” Dario says, fixing her with a look that tells me he means business. “You talk to Romeo about that first?”