Page 27 of My Heart

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My hand wobbles way too much as I reach for it, my fingers brushing against Triston’s, reminding me of last night when his hands played my body like an instrument, when his tongue followed shortly after…

“Alexis?”

The sob in her voice breaks my heart. She’s trying to push through her tears, something I remember Lisa always doing, never wanting to cause a fuss like her pain was never as important as others. And with the revelation Triston and I just shared, I find myself wanting to sob with her instead of holding it all back.

“It’s silly,” she says. “We weren’t even dating really. I went in for a kiss… I wanted to try, even if he thought I was being too forward. But he darted back so quickly. He almost hit his head on the wall.”

“Oh, Alexis.”

“You’re coming with Dad, right? To pick me up?”

I squeeze down on the phone, glancing at Triston by my side. He stands with his hands in his pockets, his stance wide. There’s unmistakable misery and anger in the twist of his lips, in the way his intense eyes sear into me. Misery for the pain he could potentially cause his daughter because of our budding…relationship and anger for the way his daughter is hurting because of some boy who doesn’t deserve her.

“Yes,” I say. “I’m coming.”

She chokes down on a sob. “Thank you. Good. I don’t want to be alone tonight. I mean, if you’re not busy…”

“I’m not. I’m here for you.”

Like I was there for her when I kissed her dad. When we confessed our deep-rooted need to be together forever. When we shared our glittering dreams of the future.

“See you soon,” she says.

“See you,” I reply, and then hand the phone back to Triston.

He pockets it and we stare at each other, the moment feeling deflated, the magic is gone.

“I guess we should get going,” I murmur.

He nods. “Yeah, I think so.”

We turn and start to walk out of the park. He doesn’t take my hand this time. He doesn’t place his hand on the small of my back either.

It’s like the idea of intimacy has faded into nothingness.

And the worst part is I don’t know whether to be relieved or hurt.

That place deep inside tells me to rage, to scream at Triston to touch me, to show me he cares. But the old Tamia – the person I was before Triston completely reshaped me – warns that Alexis is more important.

The new owner of Lisa’s heart is more important. A part of my friend is there with her and I would never hurt either of them intentionally.

“I guess we should’ve talked about that,” I say, as Triston opens the car door for me.

He nods as he walks around to his side, dropping into his seat. “Yeah, probably.”

“What are we doing to do?” I ask.

He starts the car, groaning as the engine purrs to life. “I don’t know, Tamia. Honestly. I have no clue. It’s not like we can keep this a secret forever.”

“But telling her tonight, when she’s so upset… is that a good idea?”

I can see he knows the real reason behind my words. I can see he senses my fear, the terror gripping me when I contemplate Alexis’s reaction.

He visibly accepts it. Then it hits me.

He doesn’t just accept it.

He feels it too.

“You’re right,” he says. “We can’t tell her tonight.”

There’s never going to be a perfect time to tell Alexis.

But neither of us can face it, not tonight at least, not so soon after we finally learned how we really feel about each other.

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

Triston

“I know it’s silly,” Alexis says.

I glance at the rearview mirror, staring at Tamia sitting next to my daughter. They both climbed into the backseats without discussing it, keen to be close. Tamia has spent the majority of the trip comforting Alexis.

And I’m left feeling the same way I did when Alexis was young, before her heart problems, when I’d play chauffeur and drive her and her friends all over the city. It’s not a pleasant thought, one I don’t like at all, as though Tamia is just another of Alexis’s friends.

But no.

She’s not just another friend. Tamia is becoming her best friend. Alexis has spent far more time with Tamia than any of her other friends. And, more importantly, she behaves differently around her, more relaxed, at ease, as though their shared connection through Lisa’s heart makes everything easier.

Am I really going to ruin that?

It’s not just my choice to make. Tamia agreed she wanted to wait until tomorrow, at least. But I’m not sure I’ll be ready then.

I’m not sure I ever will be.

A father’s duty is to keep his daughter safe and as happy as possible.

Another man would make the right choice, the noble choice. He’d put aside his feelings for Tamia and decide to forget the life-changing moment in the park never happened.


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