Chapter Seventeen
RAVEN
I’mhappy when Konstantin calls, but unhappy when he says he will be away on a business trip. The next two days pass in a suffocating blur of waiting. By the time Friday rolls around I am in a state of jittery nerves. I wake up early and start making breakfast for all of us. Janna is sitting at the kitchen table, her cheek leaning on the palm of her hand, telling me about a boy in her playschool who keeps using a badword.
Ever since she found out I would be going away and she would not be coming, she keeps curling herself around me and acting clingy, but Cindy has arranged for her to go see some horses later this afternoon, so even though she is still a bit anxious to be parted from me, she is in a fairly upbeatmood.
“What was the word?” Iask.
“Am I allowed to sayit?”
I put a plate of buttered toast strips in front of her. “Just thisonce.”
“Poop.”
I put her soft-boiled egg into an eggcup and set it before her. “Hmmm … That’s not very nice ofhim.”
“That’s what Isaid.”
I sit in front of her. “Well, here’s what I think. I think it doesn’t matter what anybody else does. If you think a word is bad just don’t useit.”
“Mummy?”
“Yes.”
“Where is Konstantin taking you?” she asks, nibbling at her strip of toast.
“I don’t know. It’s meant to be a surprise.”
She stops nibbling and looks at me with round curious eyes. “But what if he takes you somewhere you don’tlike?”
“Well, usually, when someone gives you a surprise they make sure that it’s something you’re going tolike.”
She looks concerned. “Is it somewhere very faraway?”
“No, darling. Remember, I’m not taking my passport which means I won’t even be leaving the country.” I smile reassuringly. “I’ll be at the end of the phone. You can call me anytime youwant.”
She nods and dips her finger into the runny yellow of her egg. I hold back from telling her off because I don’t want this morning to be anything but happy and fun forher.
“Before you know it, I’ll be back. Today you’ll go to see the horses, tonight you’ll be staying with Nan and Grandad, and tomorrow you’ll spend the whole day at Thorpe Park with Aunty Cindy. You can go on the rides and have candy floss. Would you likethat?”
She nods again.
“And I’ll be back the nextday.”
“I’m trying to be brave, but it’s really hard,” she blurts out suddenly.
My heart contracts painfully. I can’t bear to see Janna unhappy. It makes me think I am letting Octavia down. “I don’t have to go, little munchkin,” I say immediately.
Before she can answer, Cindy’s door flies open, and she walks out with chunks of her hair covering her face and her hands outstretched in front of her as if she is a zombie. “Fe Fi Fo Fum I smell the blood of an English girl,” she roars in a guttural voice.
Immediately, Janna hops off her chair and shoots across the room. She jumps behind the sofa squealing with fear and delight. Cindy chases her, tackles her to the ground, and starts blowing raspberries on her stomach. She giggles until she is breathless.
It makes me smile to see that Janna has already forgotten to be unhappy because I am going away. I know Cindy will keep her occupied doing fun things while I amgone.
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