Sebastian could only nod. Nana gave his hand a squeeze then walked away. He wished he would have met her during better circumstances. She seemed like a wonderful lady. Hopefully Raelynn pulled through and he could meet the rest of her family. She was always so busy that she barely got to see them herself, let alone introduce Sebastian to them.
When the time came for them to go see Raelynn, Jared put his arm around Sebastian's shoulders and led him upstairs with the family. The ICU floor was quiet except for the nurses moving around. There was a waiting room that they had to sit in while two people visited Raelynn at a time. Her parents went first. They both came back crying fifteen minutes later. Both sets of grandparents went, then her sister Elise and her husband Tim went. Finally Sebastian and Bianna got their turn.
Bianna clung to Sebastian's arm as they walked down the hall to Raelynn's room. Sebastian laced his fingers in hers. He needed the support as bad as she did. Sebastian was shaking, but so was Bianna, so he didn't feel as bad about it. They stopped just outside the open door that lead to Raelynn's room. The doors were large sliding glass ones that were left open. The only thing cutting off their view of her was the curtain that was pulled across the door for some privacy.
Bianna moved around the curtain first, pulling Sebastian in behind her. The sight of Raelynn laying in that bed would forever be burned into Sebastian's mind. She had tubes and wires everywhere. She was hooked up to a ventilator, so there was a tube coming out of her mouth. A large bandage was wrapped around her head and had a drainage tube sticking out from one side of it. Monitors beeped and clicked. Sebastian could see the bandage sticking out the top of her hospital gown. They had to open up her chest to repair the damage the bullet caused. The thought made Sebastian sick to his stomach.
" Jesus," Sebastian breathed and pressed back against the wall just beyond the curtain.
Bianna turned towards him, but black spots dotted his vision and he couldn't see her clearly. " Sebastian? Are you alright?" she asked, concerned.
Sebastian shook his head furiously and pressed a hand to his chest. His heart was going to pound out of his chest and he couldn't pull in enough air. " I can't...I can't breathe," he gasped.
Bianna grabbed his shoulders. " You're having a panic attack, sit down," she said softly, helping to guide him down the wall until he was sitting on his ass. " Pull your knees up and drop your head between them."
Sebastian did as he was told.
" Good. Now breathe, nice deep breaths. That's right. Good," she soothed, rubbing his back.
" I'm sorry, Bianna," Sebastian muttered from between his knees once he could breathe again.
" It's okay, Sebastian. This just tells me how much you care about my sister," Bianna murmured gently. " Are you better?"
" Yeah, thank you," Sebastian said, lifting his head.
Bianna gave him a tender smile then stood and walked over to the bed. Sebastian slowly got to his feet and made his way over to the opposite side of the bed. Sebastian took Raelynn's hand in both of his and lifted it to kiss her knuckles. Tears welled and started pouring down his face. He couldn't believe that this was actually happening. It was only last night that they were making love in her bed. And now she was fighting for her life. This had to be a nightmare that he would wake up from soon.
Bianna spoke softly to her sister from the other side of the bed while Sebastian silently cried and clutched Raelynn's hand. Bianna then looked over at Sebastian, tears streaming down her face.
" I'll give you a minute alone with her," Bianna whispered then headed for the door.
Sebastian stared down at Raelynn. How could this be happening? Was fate really this cruel? Would she really take away the one woman that could possibly be love of Sebastian’s life? All his anguish came to bubbling up to the surface and boiled over. A ragged sob escaped him. Sebastian bent over and dropped his forehead to the back of her hand that he'd been holding.
" Please, don't leave me Rae," he pleaded quietly. " I couldn't handle loosing you. I need you."
Sebastian had no idea how long he had been there. Tears continued to leak from his eyes and he had no idea if they would ever stop. He was still bent over, his head still resting on her thigh, his face turned so that he could look up at her. He didn't even know when the next time he'd be able to see her was. It killed him to not be considered her family. If he were her husband he wouldn't have this problem.