Chapter 19
MATT
There were no words said between us as I headed for home, she just sat there with her arms folded in her lap looking out the window at the scenery. She seemed so detached, so removed, like she was just going through the motions. I slammed the car into park and turned to her. “Do you even see what you’re looking at Kadyn?” she turned wide eyes to me, her face drawn and so fucking sad I wanted to hit something. It wasn’t supposed to be like this, she wasn’t supposed to be like this. She was too young, too beautiful and just too fucking perfect for this to be her life. I won’t let it be, if I had to drag her kicking and screaming into our life, the life I wanted to give her, share with her, then I will.
I got out of the car and walked around to her side, we were just a few minutes from the house but that was okay. I helped her out of the car and walked her through the trees and into the little meadow in the clearing. “Look around you Kadyn, what do you see? No don’t tense up he’s not here, he has nothing to do with this place it’s just you and me here now, tell me, what do you see?” She took her time looking around at the wild flowers that grew between the grass and trees. The sun was still in its waking up stages and the light on the leaves spoke of new beginnings.
“Do you see the wide open space, the wildflowers? Look at the sky; see how beautiful and clear it is? This would be a nice place for a picnic, I think we’ll do that soon.” I let her take in the beauty of her surroundings; I wouldn’t be surprised if this was the first time she’d allowed herself the luxury. I refuse to study similar cases to hers, I might be wrong in my thinking but I didn’t want the influence. All I know is what I want for her, I understand the danger but apart from that I wasn’t willing to give an inch. It’s just not in my make up to let someone else dictate my life and my choices. When I made the choice, when my heart settled on her she became a part of me, anything that hurt her hurts me, and there was no way I was going to let anything hurt her. That thought gave me an idea.
“Let’s go.” I was happy to see that she was almost reluctant to leave. When she forgot to be afraid she could enjoy the same things as the rest of us, so it was the fear that I had to conquer first and foremost. We made the rest of the trip with her hand in mine. My anger was beginning to fade as we pulled through the gate. I could hear the others in the back already as we walked through the house and headed in that direction. “Change of plans guys. Carrie and Nessa I need you guys, meet me in the gym in ten.”
I took her up to my room and dug through my drawers for an old t-shirt and sweats. “Here put these on.” she looked at them questioningly but went into the bathroom to put them on. She looked a mess in my too big clothes and it was so cute I had to kiss her. “Good morning my Kitten.” I held onto her after the kiss, gently rocking her back and forth.
“Good morning Matthew. Why am I wearing your clothes?”
“You’ll see come on.” I took her down to the second floor where the others were waiting in the gym. I’d asked them to join us so she wouldn’t feel alone or some shit, and because I was about to put her in some situations that might not be the most comfortable for someone who’d been through what she had and having other females around might make things easier. At least that was my thinking.
“Okay, today is the first day of your self defense classes ladies.” Nessa started grumbling about her nails and Carrie looked over at her husband and shrugged. I guess she thought he had something to do with it but he was just as surprised by the announcement as they were. He didn’t say anything though just got in line behind the girls followed by the douche. I’ve never taught a self-defense class in my life but I knew the power of feeling empowered, it was the first step in giving my woman that boost she needed, hopefully.
“Okay, first we’re gonna do some Tae Bo, loosen up those muscles and get your range of motion and hand to eye coordination working as it should.” It also teaches you how to punch and kick as well as strengthening the arms and legs which is what I was after.