The day of the prom while we were sure that he was watching the house we had a limo come to pick me up and everything. Mom had built a security fence around our yard years earlier to help keep him out and give me some freedom though I still never went out there alone. Anyway the officer dressed like me in a prom dress, did her hair like mine and kept her face hidden enough as she went out to the car. While she was doing that mom and I were sneaking out the back to this little road that ran behind our property where the cop had left her car hidden.
Mom drove me to the bus station and I took a bus out of town, I was never so afraid in my life. I couldn’t fly because they would need ID and he could always trace that but the bus wasn’t so strict and I was able to get a ticket. It would’ve been better if I could’ve driven myself but I was too afraid, what if he caught up with me on the road alone? The bare thought made me sick for days. In the end it was decided that I would take two buses in zigzagging directions using two different names and then dad met me. I was never so happy to see anyone as I was when I saw dad that third day.” Her body trembled when she was through with her tale of horror and I wanted to hurt the son of a bitch in the worst way.
I ran my hand gently over her hair and hugged her closer as I tried to think of ways to make her less fearful. I refuse to give him anymore of her. After today I wanted him to just be a bad memory but the only way I could do that was by eliminating the threat once and for all. Now that I had started my campaign to draw her out of her shell it was time to move on him. I knew now that we wouldn’t be able to move forward otherwise. My idea to focus on her now and deal with him after wasn’t going to work. I’ll have to do the two simultaneously.
“So you go to doc for your anxiety?”
“Yes, he says I’m getting better but I don’t see it. When I’m there with him doing the exercises he’s been teaching me I feel powerful and great but it doesn’t last, nothing ever does because I know better than anyone that he’s very persistent, that he’ll find a way, he always does.”
“Can you do me a favor Kadyn, can you at least try from now on to not think like that? Just take it one moment at a time, but can you try to remember the day we had today? There was no danger, nothing bad happened. Can you focus on that and maybe try to have more days like it? did you think about him at all today?”
She seemed to be giving it some thought before her face broke out in a smile and she turned wondering eyes to me. “No I didn’t. I was so caught up in what your mom or one of your sisters were saying there was no time to think about anything else. I can’t believe anyone actually spends that kind of money in one day on some clothes and your mom kept saying I needed to get this and that as if what I got wasn’t more than enough. You sure this is okay Matthew? I don’t want you to think you have to buy me things.” Half an hour alone with Carrie ought to cure her of that, that’s one female who knows her worth; she takes Josh’s gifts as her due, as she should and that boy sure knows how to spoil his wife, it’s almost embarrassing. I chose to ignore her question and focus on the other.
“You see, that’s a start we’ll have lots more days like this and soon you won’t think of him at all.” that was my hope at least. “Speaking of which, your job at the diner is that because you need money or is it just something to do?”
“Well it’s nice to have my own money but dad said he’d give me an allowance if I didn’t want to work. I guess it’s just something to pass the time since I’ve decided to take some time off before looking for a college, and since I’m not comfortable going elsewhere for a job the diner is it.” that settles that then.
I mulled over everything she told me piecing things together in my head, gauging where she was really at. She’d had it rough no doubt about that and my only concern now was how to proceed with us without causing her more harm. There’s no guidebook that I know of that tells you how to deal with your woman’s past stalking, at least I didn’t find one and I looked. It seems to me everything dealt with the stalking itself and how to not be a victim but that sounded too much like living the rest of her life with a constant reminder. I wanted to move her away from that I don’t want him having that much power in our lives.