“No…I…I don’t know okay, I just know this is moving too fast, I need time to think.”
“No.”
“What do you mean no?” she was breathing fire again fuck; can my life never be easy?
“I mean that there’s nothing to think about, I don’t need anymore time. I’ve thought this shit to death in the last few weeks and between last night and this morning the thinking stopped. You think I’ve been following your ass around town for the past few weeks because I’m bored?” She went pale as a sheet and pulled away from me. “You’ve been following me?” Her voice was a choked whisper as she looked around like a trapped rabbit.
“What the hell is wrong now?” I reached for her but she evaded my arms and turning, fell to her knees and threw up in the sand. I stood over her feeling helpless and uncertain before kneeling next to her and holding her hair back. This was bad, whatever this is, it was really bad. What the hell had I said that could make her have this kind of reaction? She might think it was too soon, but for me, if we were going to move forward in anyway, we were going to have to deal with this shit.
After she was through being sick, I picked her up and headed for the restrooms her state of undress forgotten for now. I made sure no one was in the lady’s room before pushing the door in with my foot and taking her inside. She’d gone limp and quiet in my arms and my gut was doing that sick churning thing again. That was something else that was coming to an end today, I couldn’t take much more of that feeling. There was definitely something going on with her and before my thoughts drove me insane she was going to tell me or I’ll set Josh on her ass. That fucker would know who her kindergarten teacher was by the time he was through digging.
I cleaned her up and wiped her face before lifting her and taking her back outside into the fresh air. She hadn’t said a word the whole time I was tending to her, just laid limply against me. As if all the life had gone out of her. “What was that about Kadyn? And no more of your fucked up excuses. First you froze up on me that day in town and now this. Start talking and if I don’t like the answers I promise I will go to your father.” I probably shouldn’t be threatening her so soon after she’d been sick but what the fuck! This shit had danger written all over it.
I sat on one of the benches on the boardwalk with her seated safely on my lap. My head was already coming up with its own conclusions but I wanted her to tell me that I was wrong, that what I was thinking was foolishness. She didn’t answer me and I squeezed her gently to get her attention. I wasn’t playing, if she didn’t tell me what I wanted to know I would go straight to her father and ask. With my mind made up about us I truly believe I now have every right, whether she accepts it or not. She was here, that had to mean something. Obviously that’s what Carrie had been up to last night, but she had to know I would be here and she wasn’t wearing that fucking suit for Joshua or Andrew, she better fucking not have been.
She turned her face into my neck and breathed in deep. Her body was still tense but at least she wasn’t fighting to get away. “I can’t talk about it Matt, I just can’t, not yet please. And I’d appreciate it if you waited for me to tell you myself. I don’t want my dad to worry.” Her voice had gone soft and pleading.
I took a deep breath and prayed for patience. I can’t force her if the shit was going to make her this ill but soon, one way or another I was going to have my answers.
“I’ll give you some time to get comfortable with me, that means we’ll be spending a lot more time together from now on. By then maybe you’ll feel safe enough to tell me. But tell me this one thing and I’ll leave it alone for now. Did someone hurt you?” I gritted my teeth as I awaited her answer, please tell me no. It felt like forever before she finally answered me.
“Not in the way you mean no, but…” her body shook hard enough to rattle her teeth and my gut tightened. “It’s okay, leave it for now.” I soothed her, running my hand over her hair and shushing her. “Look at me.” I turned her face myself and looked down at her, studying her.