Now that she was out of the woods I could admit to myself the depth to which she’d scared me.
When she’d collapsed in my bedroom that night I think I died a little, there’s nothing like the jarring of your soul to put things in perspective.
Now I have to mend the broken pieces and get things back on track. Starting now.
“Carrie, I know you’re pissed off at Matt and Nessa, but there’s something you have to understand, that’s our family, that’s the way we’ve always been together. What you don’t know, is that for the first time ever, they fought me, they didn’t agree with the way I handled things and they let me know it. They never once said anything against you, because they knew all along how I felt about you. If you need time to get over your hurt I understand, but understand that you’re now a part of this family, that bond extends to you. For us, that’s the way family is supposed to be, now ask yourself what the alternative would’ve been, they side with you or anyone else against one of their own, where’s the loyalty in that?”
“But I had no one, you guys are the only people I really associated with here and you all turned away from me at the same time, in front of the whole school.”
“Baby, you gave me the impression that you were tougher than this, do you think if I’d known things would turn out this way that I would’ve let it go this far? If I’d known what I know now a lot of things would’ve been done differently and you would’ve never gotten on that plane. I’m not apologizing for what happened in the woods, you pissed me off throwing that guy in my fucking face and you know it, but I will apologize for not taking better care of you, for not seeing before it was almost too late, just how vulnerable you really are. That’ll never happen again, I already told your father, now I’m telling you, I’m taking responsibility for you, for our relationship, no more fucking games, we’re together, that’s it, no more one-upmanship, you have some serious issues we need to take care of and I have to learn how to live my life in a way where you are my first priority and I don’t lose my mind when you do some shit I don’t like. We’re young, I’m sure we’ll figure it out, but the bullshit stops here. We’re together, in case you don’t know what that means, it means you’re mine and I’m yours, exclusively. You don’t keep shit from me, I don’t keep shit from you, if something’s bothering you come to me that’s it. I know about your mother, about her neglect among other things, you don’t deal with her unless you want to on your terms, I’d prefer you didn’t see her at all but that’s your mother and people change their minds about this shit all the time, as a matter of fact something happened yesterday while you were asleep.
Your father found out some things that happened while you were living with her.....”
“Joshua.......”
“Ssh, it’s okay, he handled it, he’s actually trying to figure out how to bring charges against her since you were a child then and you’re still a minor in Arizona, we’ll see, that’s up to you anyway, if you want to drop it, that’s what we’ll do, just know that we know a little more about your life with her. There’re some other things I need to take care of and then we’ll move on from this. I’m not going to change lamb, and I don’t think you really want me to but I will be more careful with you, that I can promise you. Now, is there anything you want to say?”
She fidgeted a bit as she looked at me, probably amazed that I was talking so much.
“How do you find out so much about me?.......I mean sometimes you seem to know things that there’s no way you should know, do you still have your investigator following me?”
“He hasn’t been for a while, not since you went away actually.”
“So who followed me from the diner that night you caught me and Matt talking?”
“That was me, as pissed as I was I still didn’t want you on the streets that late at night alone, you’ve seen the flyers I’m sure and if not your father would’ve told you about the attacks.”
“He did but it didn’t look like your Rover.”
“I was driving the Bugatti.”
“Oh, okay, so you still haven’t told me......how do you know these things?”
“That’s my secret to keep, just know I’ve always got your best interest at heart, I need to know everything that’s going on with you, it’s just who I am, we’ll call it one of my quirks.