“Oh, Drake, I don’t know what to say,” she said in a choked voice.
Tears welled in her eyes and he hastily thumbed at the moisture as it began to leak down her cheeks.
“I was so happy. You made me happy. And I wanted to make you happy. Everything was . . . perfect. And then . . .”
“Shhh, my angel,” he said, cradling her once more in his arms. “It will be perfect again. I promise. I don’t expect you to forgive or forget any time soon. All I ask is the opportunity to prove to you that I can be the man you deserve. Just say yes and we’ll take it one day at a time, and I’ll promise to try to make each day better than the last. I have no doubt we’ll hit a few roadblocks along the way, but I can promise you that what happened that night will never happen again. I’d give everything I own to be able to go back and make it never happen.”
She leaned her forehead against his, closing her eyes as she battled the tears streaking silently down her cheeks.
“I want this—you,” she whispered in an aching voice that throbbed with emotion. “But I’m scared, Drake. You have so much power over me. You have the power to make me so very happy, but you also have the power to destroy me like no other. I don’t think I’ll survive so much pain again. I’ve been dead for the last five days, and I hate how vulnerable you make me feel, that I depend on you for so much happiness. It scares me to death. Can you understand that? I can’t imagine you being helpless, at someone else’s mercy and dependent on them just to maintain your sanity and keep it together.”
“I do understand,” he murmured. “I understand far more than you realize because you hold me in the palms of your hands, and you have as much power over me as you say I have over you. And I have to tell you, it sucks. I hate feeling so helpless. I’ve never been dependent on another person in my life. I’m always in control and yet when I’m with you I feel anything but in control. I feel as though I’m walking through a minefield, and one wrong move and I destroy something very precious and beautiful. I damn near did just that. I certainly inflicted a lot of damage, and that makes me a complete bastard. Believe me, Angel. I will never forget. I will never forgive myself for what happened that night. It’s something I’ll have to live with for the rest of my life. I haven’t eaten, I haven’t slept, I’ve been a shell of a man for the last five days, and self-loathing has slowly eaten a hole in my soul until there’s barely anything left, if anything at all.”
“Drake, no,” she cried out. “Stop. Just stop! You can’t torture yourself this way. It does neither of us any good. If we’re going to make this work, then we have to put it behind us and move forward. If you stay bogged down in the past, it will destroy us both. If I can forgive, then you should be able to do the same.”
Drake sucked in his breath and his pulse accelerated wildly. He was shaking and desperately trying to hold himself together as her words penetrated his anger and grief. He grasped her shoulders and pushed his face toward hers until they were nose to nose.
“Do you mean that, Evangeline? Are you saying what I think you’re saying? Are you giving me another chance?”
His heart felt like it was about to burst out of his chest. It was beating far too fast and for a moment, he feared the strain would be too much and he’d have a heart attack. His entire body shook. Not one part of him was calm or still as his gaze bored into hers, seeking confirmation of the hope that had taken root and snaked insidiously through his veins.
She swallowed and he saw how difficult this was for her. How monumental a decision she’d reached. But then she slowly nodded.
“I need the words,” he said hoarsely. “I have to be sure. I need to hear you say it out loud.”
“Yes,” she said softly. “I’ll give you—us—another chance. I won’t lie. I’m scared out of my mind. But I’m willing to try.”
It was too much for Drake. He crushed her into his arms, holding on to her for dear life. He rocked back and forth, alternating murmuring against her hair and brushing kisses over the silken tresses.
A huge knot in his throat prevented him from articulating his thoughts and emotions, so he simply held her, touching her, caressing her, kissing her over and over as he silently gave thanks for this beautiful, sweet and generous woman in his arms.