“But there’s a man.”
“Doesn’t matter, he’s done with me. I just don’t think I can be done with him. I don’t think I ever will be. I feel ruined.”
“You’re not.”
“I couldn’t convince him…I just couldn’t convince him that was the truth.”
“His loss.”
“No, mine. I’ll never in my life find another guy like him. I don’t want to.”
“Oh, baby girl,” she whispers, pulling me into her arms. “I know how you love, Laney. And believe it or not, you’re so transparent when you do. There is no way in the world he’s clueless to that and no way in the world you would fall for any guy who couldn’t see your true heart. He knows. But you know the dumbest thing a woman can do, is wait for any man to come to his senses. If he’s worth a damn, and he knows you’re worth it, he’ll come for you. And you don’t have to make it easy on him.”
“No worries about that, I’ll be a continent away. And the scary part is I’m not even sure I want to go anymore. I’ve been dreaming about it for so long, but every time I think of my future now, it’s here.”
“Because of him?”
“I’d hoped. Is that so wrong?”
“No, baby. It’s just that you have a lot of ‘what ifs’ to sort. This is one of them.”
“What do I do?”
“You go, you explore your heart and mind. If he ever comes calling, then you know your place with him. Until then, you find your own place in the thick of things.”
I nod into her robe, inhaling her scent.
“Okay,” I say, letting out a breath. “Okay.”
“Come on, coffee’s ready. Let’s have it on the porch, and you can tell me all about your trip.”
Sniffing, I pull back and wipe my face. She nods in reassurance, her eyes crinkling at the sides. “She would be so proud of you.”
“Thank you.”
“I miss her.”
“Me too.”
I pour our coffee and begin to stir in the milk when I hear thunder in the distance.
“Sounds like rain,” I mumble, dumping in a spoon of sugar.
“Forecast read sunny today and tomorrow. Then again, you couldn’t pay me to be a Texas weatherman. Those poor souls are doomed from day one.”
We file onto the porch as the screen door slaps behind us. I’m going to miss that slap. I sip my coffee and study the scenery before me and imagine myself doing the same in a small café in Rome, which is my first stop. A slither of excitement races through me, and I consider that a good sign.
“Damn,” my mother remarks of the faraway noise. “That’s…what in the hell is that?”
Our eyes meet in confusion as we hit the edge of the steps peering down the driveway. The repetitive boom in the distance is growing closer. It’s then I hear the pattern of the thunder.
“Momma, I don’t think that’s thunder,” I whisper, just as a distant whistle blows and realization hits. “Oh my God.”
My coffee cup bounces off the porch and into a bush as I strain to see the source of the noise.
It’s only when I see the first line of Rangers march down the driveway that I screech, and turn to haul ass back inside. My retreat is cut short when the front door closes and locks. Another rapid succession of a whistle has me screaming and pounding on the door.
“Let me in! Momma! Let me in!”