It was with satisfaction that she saw him splutter on a mouthful of wine. He just about recovered enough to nod.
‘On a serious note, though, when you say “limited period of time”, what do you mean?’
‘A month—tops.’
‘But...how does that work? Is it a lunar month? So that on day twenty-seven you—what?—have one final moment of fun, then get dressed and say goodbye?’
‘Yes. The whole point of our time together is that it is enjoyable, and both of us can enjoy it without anyone getting hurt or having any regrets.’
‘So it really is a business deal?’
‘Yes. No... It’s a mutual agreement—an equal partnership, if you like. It means the relationship doesn’t have to be deep or meaningful or complicated or messy. And the most important thing is that no one gets hurt.’
‘But what if you actually like each other?’
‘We do like each other. I wouldn’t want to spend that long with someone I didn’t like or enjoy spending time with. And I’m not indiscriminate—I only tend to date a couple of times a year.’
‘I don’t get how you can so categorically rule out a long-term relationship?’
‘Because I really can’t see the point.’
‘Why not?’
‘Because it opens you up to a lifetime of worry and angst and the potential to hurt or be hurt.’
Sarah blinked. ‘But it also opens you up to the possibility of a lifetime of love and happiness.’
‘My way of life brings a lifetime of guaranteed happiness.’
‘What about love?’
‘Too much risk of mess and complications and misery. Seems to me that love can end up being one-sided, and then any benefits stop being mutual.’
‘OK, then. What about family? Don’t you want kids?’
‘Nope. The whole idea leaves me cold—refrigerated, in fact. The idea of that sort of responsibility—someone dependent on me—isn’t for me.’
‘But you’re missing out. I guess it’s not logical, but from the moment I held Jodie in my arms I knew she was the most important person in my universe.’
Her daughter had rescued her from herself, given her a reason to exist. But even without that Sarah knew she would have felt that same overwhelming love.
‘Call me selfish, but I’ll give the whole thing a miss. Being a husband, a father—it’s too much of a commitment. I’m OK with being by myself.’
But he wasn’t selfish—she wasn’t sure what made her so certain, but she was. Perhaps it was because he’d given her a chance...perhaps it was because she sensed his relationship rules were based around his own moral code of not wanting anyone to get hurt.
‘Maybe you’re just being realistic. In your world it is harder to remain faithful, and the divorce rate is higher—that’s partly why so many Hollywood romances break up.’
She realised immediately that had been the wrong thing to say. Anger thinned his mouth to a grim line and his cobalt eyes hardened.
‘Fidelity is not the issue,’ he said.
But along with the anger there was truth, and an underlying shadow of hurt.
Hurriedly she waved her hands. ‘I’m not accusing you of being unfaithful. Truly. I only meant that maybe you limit the time period because you’re worried you might be—or worried she might be... After all, temptation is all around you, and I guess the fact that you are a young, hot millionaire doesn’t hurt. Women must throw themselves at you. What I meant was kudos to you—you’ve recognised that a relationship would be hard so you aren’t risking it.’
The grim line remained thin, and there was a definite suggestion of gritted teeth as he spoke. ‘I did not say a relationship would be hard for me. I said I am choosing not to have one. And it is not because I doubt my ability to be faithful—I simply cannot see the point of commitment. Taking the risk of being hurt or inflicting hurt when there is no benefit to the risk.’ He took a deep breath and suddenly his lips relaxed into a smile. ‘But it’s good to know you think I’
m young and hot.’