No wonder she found it so difficult to trust. Her father had laid the foundations and he had unthinkingly reinforced her reasons to feel that way.
‘I don’t know how you survive something like that,’ he said quietly. Except Teddie hadn’t just survived. She’d faced insurmountable obstacles and triumphed.
She shrugged. ‘It got worse before it got better. My mum lost it—big-time. I kept having to stay home to take care of her so my school got involved, and then I had to go and live with foster parents. Only, we weren’t a good fit and I kept running away, so basically I ended up in care.’
Teddie swallowed. She couldn’t look at him, not wanting to see the diffidence or, worse, the pity in his eyes.
‘It wasn’t all bad, though. That’s where I met Elliot,’ she said defiantly.
‘Teddie...’
She tried to block the softness in his voice, but then she felt his hand on hers.
‘Don’t be nice to me.’
She pushed him away. If he touched her she would be lost, but he was taking her hand again, wrapping his fingers around hers, and she was leaning into him, closing her eyes against the tears.
‘I don’t want your pity.’
‘Pity? I don’t pity you.’
He lifted her chin and, looking into his fierce, narrowed gaze, she knew that he was telling the truth.
‘I’m in awe of you.’
She bit her lip, stunned by his words. Four years ago she’d thought that hearing the truth would give him a bulletproof reason to walk away, and yet he was here, holding her close, his heartbeat beating in time to hers.
‘I should have told you the truth before. But I thought you’d get bored with me before then.’
He shook his head, clearly baffled. ‘Bored! Yeah, you’re right—I can understand why you thought that might happen.’ When she didn’t respond, he frowned. ‘Seriously?’ he said softly. ‘Don’t you know how smitten I was?’
Her heart gave a thump; her eyes slid away from his. ‘It was all so quick...and I guess you weren’t really my type.’
His eyes looked directly into hers. ‘You had a type?’
‘Yes—no. I just meant the other men I dated weren’t like you.’
Her cheeks felt hot. How could she explain his beauty, his aloofness, the compelling polished charm of a man born to achieve?
‘They were scruffy guys I met in bars. You didn’t even look at the bill before you paid it.’
The faint flush of colour on her cheeks as much as her words did something to soothe her remark about him not being her type, but he was still trying to understand why she thought he would have got bored with her.
There was a drawn-out silence. Teddie could feel the curiosity behind his gaze, but it was hard to shape her thoughts, much less articulate them out loud.
‘It wasn’t about you really—it was me. Even before we got married I felt like an imposter. And then when I moved into the apartment I panicked. It felt like when I was child, with my dad. I just couldn’t seem to hold you—you were so focused on work.’
‘Too focused.’
He breathed out unsteadily, knowing now how difficult it would have been for her to admit how vulnerable she was—how difficult it must still be.
‘You’re an incredible person, Teddie, and your father was a fool not to see that. You deserved better than him.’
He brushed his lips against her forehead, the gentleness of his touch making her melt inside.
‘You deserved better than me.’
Reaching up, she rested the back of her hand against the rough stubble of his cheek and his arm tightened around her.