Unwilling to probe as to why that should be the case, she gave him a quick, careful smile. ‘Anyway, I just wanted to say sorry.’
He frowned. ‘There’s no need to apologise.’ Pushing away from the door, he walked over and sat down beside her. ‘Yesterday was always going to be a hard day,’ he said quietly.
Something in his tone made her breathing slow and, looking across at him, she felt a swell of guilt rise up inside her like the wash from a boat.
For her, Archie’s birthday celebrations had been tinged with sadness because Della was missing. But for the first time it occurred to her that there was someone else who should have been at the party but hadn’t.
Lao Dan.
Her stomach knotted. Up until now she had only thought about him briefly, and mainly in relation to that fact that Archie no longer had a father.
But Charlie had lost a father too.
‘Yes, it was.’ She hesitated, and then, reaching out, touched him lightly on the arm. ‘It must have been hard for you and your sisters, not having your dad there, and I didn’t think about that.’
He shook his head. ‘It’s not the same, Dora. My father was an old man. He had lived a good life—the life he wanted. It made sense, him dying—not like Della.’
She bit her lip. ‘But you must miss him so much.’
How could he not? Charlie was running his father’s business; there must be reminders everywhere, every day, just like there was for her with Della.
For a moment he didn’t answer, and then his hand found hers.
‘He always liked getting the family together. It was important to him. But I’m not sure that having a party was such a good idea for you.’
He looked tense, unhappy, and she felt something inside her pinch.
‘But it was.’ Her fingers tightened around his. ‘Archie loved every minute of it. And I know I got upset, but I really did enjoy it—especially meeting your sisters. They were so kind to me, and so friendly.’
She felt the muscles in her face stiffen. At the time she had been relieved and grateful that everyone had so readily accepted the news of their engagement. Now, though, she felt ashamed and guilty.
His sisters couldn’t possibly want their brother to marry a cocktail waitress he had known for less than a fortnight. But they had acted as if they were perfectly happy with the news. Not just out of politeness, but out of love. They loved their brother, and they thought that she and Charlie were in love.
Only how would they feel about her if they knew the truth?
‘What is it?’ he asked.
Looking up at him, she pulled a face. ‘They think we’re in love. It feels wrong. Lying to them. I know that’s what we’re going to have to do, but it’s hard—and I think it’s going to be harder for you. I don’t have anyone. But you’re going to have to pretend to your whole family that we’re in love.’ She hesitated. ‘And then there’s your mother...’
Nuria. Lao Dan’s widow.
She knew he had told his mother they were engaged, but she had no idea how she had reacted to the news that her son was marrying the sister of her husband’s mistress.
Her throat tightened. She could make a pretty educated guess.
He didn’t reply, just stared past her.
Trying to fill the silence, she began speaking in a rush. ‘I just know that if Della was here I couldn’t lie to her. I wouldn’t be able to—I wouldn’t want to. And I don’t want you to have—’
‘It’s fine, Dora.’
Curving his arm around her waist, he pulled her onto his lap, and she had a sudden fierce flashback to that first, feverish time they had made love in the library.
‘Everything’s going to be fine.’ His dark eyes held hers. ‘You just need to focus on what is true. That, together, we’ve found a way to make this work for Archie.’
That was easy for him to say. He could make anything work. He was the CEO of a hotel casino empire. His entire life ran like one those expensive Swiss watches with all the cogs and dials. She doubted he had ever messed up anything.
Whereas she had never finished anything she’d started.