CHAPTER ONE
* Valerie *
Pausing with my hand on my apartment door, I reminded myself yet again that the world is a calm, safe place, and going outside was normal. People did it every day. Leaving my tranquil apartment was a good thing for me.
Taking a deep breath before I finally turned the handle, I left to go to the coffee shop. Millions of people did this each morning, but I hope it wasn’t as difficult for them.
There is something deeply comforting about a good coffee shop. It doesn’t even matter whether it’s fancy or old fashioned or modern. Once I’d been to a cafe a few times, it began to feel like mine. I tended to be a bit jumpy in new places, preferring the familiar whenever possible.
Working from home tended to make people squirrelly after a while, so I tried to start most mornings by working for a few hours in a coffee shop. It forced me to get some fresh air and daylight, and actually talk to real humans without emailing or texting. My anxiety was a bit extra sketchy until I had interacted with a person or place a couple of times. Then I could usually chill out, depending on the circumstances.
When I walked to one of my usual destinations this morning, I was horrified to see the “closed” sign on the door. For a second I wondered hopefully if they were just on vacation. Sure enough, there was a handwritten sign underneath saying thanks for many pleasant years, but due to rent increases, they had to close permanently.
It was happening far too often all across the city. Landlords would suddenly jack up a small business owner’s rent by twenty percent or more, and they’d be forced to vacate. Soon there would be nothing left but big-name chains.
Usually, I would stick my nose in my phone and search for the nearest replacement. Yet with the sun beaming down on my face, and the buds just starting to peek out from the trees, I tried to be brave. I thought perhaps just this once I should take a chance. I could let the city decide. Turning right, I walked slowly, looking around.
I tried to look in shop windows, and ground myself in the morning energy of this somewhat sleepy neighborhood. Before I tackled my busy day ahead, updating two client websites while desperately trying to find some new business as well, this little breather would be good for me.
I didn’t go out walking much. My acquaintances were quiet people too. We usually texted, and I didn’t see them in person very often. My clients were the same way. For the thousandth time, I promised myself that I’d try to get over my jittery fear of new people someday, and create some human connections in my life besides the friendly cashier at the grocery store, and the few people I chatted to at book readings.
Three blocks away was a coffee shop that I’d seen online but hadn’t been to yet. It was an independent chain of just three stores, started by someone local. It was one of those places that made sure that their suppliers were fairly paid, with ethical beans. Certainly worth a try.
As I walked in, I was dazzled by how utterly charming but comfortable everything was. Plush chairs at gorgeous wooden tables. Huge panels of stained glass hung in the center of the biggest windows to diffuse the light. White walls with huge bright paintings. The smell of great coffee danced through the air.
The table in the farthest corner was empty, and I immediately dropped my laptop bag and coat there to claim it, even though the shop was only half full.
After stowing my things, I dug in my purse to get my wallet, then turned and nearly walked into a man’s chest. I instantly started to panic, but looking up, he was smiling sweetly. “Hi, welcome to the Dark Mug.”
Something inside me became quiet as I stared at him. Still. Calm.
His broad shoulders and thick arms looked like they belonged on a wrestler, not a man who worked in a coffee shop. His dark hair and dark eyes were softened by the most adorable smile, surrounded by a slight scruff of beard.
His face was so perfect my eyes couldn’t stop studying him. I’d never seen such a gorgeous man in person, and was surprised by the warmth of his expression as he smiled at me.
My gut reaction was to cringe and run away. I knew that every cell in my body was programmed to overreact to anything scary, but I tried to tell myself that nearly bumping into someone is a minor incident. My nervousness was tempered by my instinct to not appear rude.
“Hi,” I said, hearing the soft warble in my voice even from that single syllable.