She was surprised and just a little scared which she should be. All the way home I didn’t say a word to her, I was too fucking pissed. If I opened my mouth I was sure I would do more damage than good. At the house I slammed out of the car and walked around to get her. She was shaking like a leaf.
I don’t know what she expected me to do to her, but as soon as the door was closed, she started to run. I caught her around her neck and brought her back.
Calm the fuck down Ashton .You can’t strangle the mother of your child for being stupid. I wanted to shake some sense into her but I couldn’t do that either. She must’ve seen the intent on my face because she finally opened her mouth to speak.
“You can’t punish me. You’ll hurt the baby.”
“Oh there’re plenty of ways to punish your ass that wouldn’t hurt my kid. You want to tell me what the fuck you were doing?”
“I just went for a walk. What’s the big deal?”
“Nikki do not fuck with me! Look at me. I am not your father I will not put up with your bullshit do you understand? How did you get into town?”
“I just said I walked.”
“You…” I pulled my phone from my pocket and called the doctor she’d just walked more than a good hour into town and I wasn’t sure if that was safe for the kid or not. A quick consult with the doc confirmed my fears, though walking and light exercise was good for pregnancy walking of that magnitude wasn’t recommended that early in her condition. I was so pissed when I hung up the phone I was afraid to go near her.
“You’re a selfish little bitch, I don’t even want to look at you right now. Were you trying to kill the baby? Is that it? You want to have an abortion?”
“What no?”
“Yeah well that’s what it seems like to me why else would you decide to make the trek into town?”
“I didn’t know it was dangerous Jeremy I swear.”
“Save it, I don’t have time for little girls and their fucking games.”
“I told you I didn’t want you to go.”
“Are you fucking crazy? You don’t tell me what I can or cannot do. If that’s what you’re looking for, here’s what we’ll do, you can stay here until the baby’s born, leave the kid here and get the fuck out because that shit’s not gonna happen.”
Of course the tears started but I wasn’t interested, she’d picked the wrong fucker to pull that shit on. I’m not sure what the fuck went on in her home. What kind of relationship her parents played out in front of her but she had the wrong fucking idea if she thought her little ass was going to run me. That stunt she pulled with the walking into town that’s the kind of shit that would make me lose it. First off, there isn’t really anything between my place and town. Anyone could’ve come along and picked her up and no one would be the wiser because the little hard headed shit had snuck off without saying a word. I got the chills just thinking about it. I’d read in one of the many books that some women had miscarried from walking too far of a distance in their first trimester I’m not sure if she’d read the same thing but I wasn’t making any excuses for her. She needed to grow the fuck up. I left her sitting on the couch and headed out back for my exercise course, I figured it was best for all involved if I put some distance between us, it also gave me the chance to put shit in perspective. Maybe this was too much for her, I’ve been playing the heavy with her ever since she got here maybe she was just out for a good time and this whole baby thing was too much for her. If she’d headed into town to teach me a lesson she was going to be on the losing end because I don’t play games and I especially wouldn’t be fucking around with my kid’s life so I had to do some thinking on what we were dealing with here.
Fucking aside I liked Nikki in fact if I was being honest I think I might be in love with the little shit already something that I had never envisioned for myself but I’m a hard mother fucker I know me, she mess around and fuck up I could seriously hurt her. Maybe she wasn’t ready for what I needed, maybe I had to find another solution other than marriage.
“Fuck that my kid’s gonna have my name no matter what.” And he sure the fuck was going to be raised by me. I worked out my anger pushing my body hard as I came to terms with shit in my head. The reality is that I’m dealing with a young girl who was probably scared out of her fucking mind to be faced with motherhood, she had dreams that she probably now believed were no longer possible, she also had the fear of how her family was going to react to our news. Apart from all that I’m pretty sure she was accustomed to getting her way that’s how she ended up here, she probably saw me as just another old guy that she could get over on she wasn’t going to have much luck with that.
By the time I was finished, an hour had gone by. She was still lying on the couch curled up with the stupid teddy bear I’d got for the baby. I ignored her and went to take a shower. I wasn’t as angry any more but I wasn’t quite ready to forgive her either, I wasn’t even going to entertain her bullshit excuse that she did it because I went to break things off with the women. I’d explained that shit to her and that was enough if we were going to go anywhere she had to learn from now what kind of man I am I’ll be damned if I let any woman rule me what the fuck was she thinking?
I went to the kitchen to get a beer and she came in behind me.
“I’m sorry Jeremy...”
“Not good enough what you did was stupid and dangerous…”
She came around the table and wrapped her arms around me from behind.
“Please don’t leave me I didn’t mean anything by it.”
I held firm not giving an inch.
“Let’s get one thing straight Nikki, you do anything to hurt my kid there’s going to be problems, you get pissed and do stupid shit that’s just fucked. You didn’t think, you can’t make those kind of plays anymore it’s not just about you, grow the fuck up.” I left her there and went to my office. She knew better than to follow me right now at least and hopefully she’d learn to stop fucking up.
I took out her ring from my desk and looked at it, did I want to give this girl this ring? You shoulda thought of that before you fucked her asshole or at the very least worn a rubber.
Chapter 7
I spent the next few hours in deep thought. Things had moved way too fast and I held the blame for that shoulda known better. It was too late for that now though there was a kid involved, an innocent; it’s my job to protect the innocent. To be fair Nikki was an innocent as well but her hard headed approach was going to clash with me at every turn and I can’t see me putting myself through that shit for the rest of my life and that’s what marriage is, the rest of your fucking life.