Ironically, she now couldn’t stand pepperoni.
It was like all my Christmases had come at once.
I wasn’t telling her that, though.
She sighed, sitting on a stool. “Oh, I’m too tired to argue with you. Eight baby hedgehogs and one human one are too exhausting for words.”
“Barbie gave birth, then.” Leo opened the Doritos and stuck his hand in. “Stupid name for a hedgehog.”
“Thank you,” Ava muttered. “I don’t even like them, and now I have ten.”
“It could be worse. You could be Halley,” I offered.
“Is she throwing up into her hair every day?” she shot back.
“Unless she’s part of your experiment,” Leo started, “No. But she does have Boris Jr. living on a cat tower in her utility room, remember?”
Ah. Of course. Boris had, once again, knocked up Betty, and earlier this year, one of the babies had almost died. Halley had taken the runt of the litter in and nursed him through until he was healthy enough to go back to Betty, but he’d refused.
Then he’d humped Preston’s shoe.
Thus the name Boris Jr. It now refused to live outside and had his very own cat tower, where he fought for dominance with the actual cat they’d adopted a few months ago.
They were thisclose to opening their own Facebook profile.
I kind of wanted them to.
“Mmph.” Ava snatched the chips away from her brother. “Get the fuck off my Doritos.”
Leo shot me a look.
I nodded, eyes wide. “Listen to her, man. They’re stashed everywhere.”
She froze. “Actually, no. I ate them all. I need more.”
“Weren’t you throwing up two hours ago?”
“Weren’t you just telling me how much you love me, and you’re going to get me Doritos whenever I want since this is your fault?”
“Technically, you’re fifty percent responsible.”
“Technically, Leo is the one who made us live together, and we agreed that everything that happened was his fault.”
She wasn’t wrong there.
Leo motioned toward the door. “Yeah. I, er, I’ve got a date, so…”
Ava grinned, orange Dorito coating her lips. “That’s what I thought.”
“Love you, sis.” Leo blew an awkward kiss in her direction, and she responded by shoving her middle finger in his direction. He laughed and left as quickly as he’d arrived.
I waited for a second before I said, “So… I should get you more Doritos now.”
She looked up at me, her bright eyes shining wide, and shook her head.
“Candy? Chocolate? Ice-cream? Pickles?” I paused. “Don’t pregnant people like pickles dipped in random shit?”
Her bottom lip stuck out. “Can I have a cuddle?”
My heart squeezed tightly. I didn’t even answer her. I just crossed the room and wrapped my arms around her, pulling her into me.
“I’ll cuddle you for however long you want, whenever you want. Even if your hair smells a bit like vomit and you’re covered in Dorito dust.” I kissed the top of her head.
She shook silently.
“Are you crying?”
“No.” She was laughing. She was fucking laughing. “This is just…weird. Don’t you think?”
“The fact you threw up in your hair and didn’t shower? More gross than weird.”
“Oh, my God. You dick.”
“My dick got us into this situation, sunshine. It ain’t getting us out of it.”
She squeezed my waist hard. “No. Like, everything. We just bought a house and we’re having a baby. Reagan and Halley are both engaged, and Halley’s getting married in three weeks.”
“Reagan is eloping if you believe what she says.”
“Only because Bethel keeps crashing Halley’s fittings, and she’s shitting herself.” She paused. “I’m going to be too fat for a bridesmaid dress soon.”
“Okay, listen to me.” I pulled back and leaned down, framing her face with my hands. “Reagan and Noah are getting married in eighteen months. The baby will be here, and you will be beautiful. You will be beautiful every single day between now and then, you hear me? Even when you’re nine months pregnant or you think you’re horrible or your hair has someone else’s vomit in it instead of your own, I will not think you are anything less than absolutely beautiful.”
Her eyes filled with tears. “Keep talking. I like that.”
I smiled, perching on the stool next to her so I was on her level. “I love you, Ava. I’ve loved you for so long, and I will love you in another twenty years. Okay? And in twenty years, when we have a soccer team and fifty hedgehogs living in the corner of our garage, I’ll love you even more than I do right now. All right?”
“All right,” she sobbed. “I’ll hold you to that.”
I laughed, pulling her into my body once more. “You’re so silly.”