“Does Mum know about all this?”
I laughed. “Of course she knows. I had nothing when I met her, just a suitcase of clothes and a soon to be repossessed apartment.”
“I don’t get it,” she said. “So, she loved you but you didn’t love her?”
I tipped my head. “How likely does that scenario sound? Neither of us loved each other. It was a deal we both wanted at the time.”
She frowned, weighing it up. “I don’t understand. Why get married, then?”
“I got a new start. She got a husband.”
She shook her head at that, taking it hard.
“But why?! I’ve wanted her to get a husband my whole life, Kyle. I wanted it more than anything, but it didn’t matter shit to her then. I figured maybe one day I’d have a proper family, and maybe then she’d love me. Maybe then I’d be good enough, but I never even saw her with a man until you, even though I wished for it. Then she rocks on up one day with a meet Daddy!” She paused, shaking her head. “I thought I was so fucking stupid, for even thinking she’d give me a daddy one day. For even wanting a daddy one day.”
“Not stupid,” I said. “Normal. Everyone needs love, Aimee.”
“Yeah, they do, I just never had any.”
I wondered how it would affect her, knowing what a loser I really am. My eyes met hers, searching, and she saw it. She read my mind.
“You really think I give a shit about the fact you met my mum with nothing but a suitcase? I’ve always had money, Kyle. It doesn’t mean anything to me. What I need is someone who’ll hold me through my nightmares and ask how my day went. Who’ll expect me to behave like a civil human being and put me in my place when I don’t. Who’ll look at me like I’m the hottest, sexiest piece of ass he’s ever seen, and ravage me like a monster, that’s what means shit to me. If you think your little I’m broke confession is enough to put me off then you’re a fool, Kyle. A stupid fool.”
“You can do better than me,” I smiled. “A lot better. Look at you, sweetheart, you’ve got your whole life ahead of you.”
“I didn’t have a life before you! Nothing that meant anything. I was a dropout too, remember? On the edge of college expulsion without a single clue what I’d do with the rest of my life.”
I took her hand across the table, squeezing her fingers tight in mine. “You’re sure this is what you want? You’re sure you want me and us and a life together?”
“Deadly sure,” she said. “Another stupid word and I’ll put you over my knee, Daddy.”
She had me, finally, coaxing a smile despite my better senses. “This sure is love for me, baby girl,” I said. “It’s yours if you want it.”
“I want it.” She squeezed my fingers right back, brushing angel curls from her eyes. “Now, tell me about my mother... why the fuck did she suddenly want a husband on a beach one day?”
Oh shit.
Some truths were yet to be told.
My wife Louise was furious when I gave her the rundown of the past few weeks, but not for the reasons anyone would have expected. She didn’t give a shit about me boning her daughter, or about me confessing my financial insufficiency. As usual, Louise Rowley cared only for herself, and her guarded little reputation.
“Let’s get this straight, Kyle!” she snapped. “I leave you alone for three weeks. Three poxy weeks to keep up appearances, and in that time you manage to fuck my daughter, spill your guts about your unfortunate predicament and tell her our marriage is a sham. That’s good going, congratulations.”
“You could see it that way,” I said. “Alternatively, you could examine the facts. Aimee is back in college. She smiles these days, and she does her assignments without question. She doesn’t drink, doesn’t screw randoms whenever you’re not looking, and has embraced an all-round happier demeanour.”
“Well, fucking bravo,” she snipped. “Wonderful. Let’s have a celebration, shall we? Champagne and cake, anyone?” She pulled a face, like she wanted to crush me under her boot. “All she’s ever wanted is a big, hunky dad on the scene. I got one for her, finally, and she takes his dick at the first opportunity. Good job I didn’t really love you, isn’t it? The little madam would have wormed her way in regardless.”
“She’s not stupid,” I said. “She knew you didn’t love me.”
“Lucky guess.”
“Not a lucky guess. She does know you, Louise, she’s lived with you for twenty years. Well, on paper anyway.” I sighed, running my hands through my hair. “Why don’t you just tell her about Helen? She’ll understand. This isn’t the middle-ages, they don’t burn lesbians at the stake.”