But life on Mortuus can’t possibly be much better.
The Rades, the strange monsters that inhabit the lands, the extreme weather and that’s just the start of it. According to Hadrian and Avrell, they haven’t even begun to explore the rest of the planet outside their Facility. Who knows what other dangers could be lurking behind every corner? No, I’ll leave the babymaking up to Theron. I don’t know what I’ll do once I’m finally reunited with my mother—I haven’t really thought past then, but starting a family won’t be a high priority.
Maybe now that I’ve found her, my priority will be to find myself.
“I’m sure she’ll be a lucky woman,” I say when I realize he’s still waiting for my response.
“Of course she will be,” he answers and I roll my eyes because it’s such a Theron thing to say.
I’m too tired by this point to worry about the twisting in my gut at his answer, so I say, “We should get some sleep.” Sleep would help begin to put all of this behind me.
“You don’t want a mate?” he asks, as though he didn’t hear what I just said.
“The only thing I’ve focused on since my mother left was finding her. I’ve never had the opportunity to think about it. So no, I guess for now, I don’t.”
“Then why would you mate with me? Is this an Earth II custom? The humans at the Facility never mentioned it.”
“Do we really have to have this conversation now? I thought we already covered all this and I’m tired. Can’t we just chalk it up to being a mistake and move on?”
Who knew the proverbial ladies’ man would be so into DTR. Maybe “defining the relationship” is a mort thing. They are probably biologically programmed to lock a woman down. Which explains the goddamn paralytic sperm. They should really come with a warning label.
“I’d like to understand so I don’t make the same mistake in future encounters with human females. Aria has told us of the Kevin’s of your world. Men who would seek to take advantage of their females, hurt them, use them. I may enjoy teasing, but I would never, ever want a woman to see me as a Kevin.”
“For starters, I guess I should explain that I wanted you to pull out, which means I didn’t want you to um, come inside me. Since it was only supposed to be one time, I didn’t want to risk making a baby.”
“You wanted me to spill my seed outside of you?” He looks confused and I have to wonder what kind of sex education these guys receive. I mean, for their race it must be different, but I guess maybe they haven’t been with the humans long enough to learn everything.
I lift a shoulder and avert my eyes. My cheeks burn hotter than the sun. C’mon, Willow, you’re a grown woman. You should be able to have this conversation. “Yes. Since we don’t have access to birth control, it’s the only method of protection I could think of in the moment.”
“Birth control?”
“A way to ensure you don’t make a baby. On Earth II, we have several methods. Condoms, like a covering that you put on your”—I gesture with my hands—“that is a sort of barrier. There’s medication you can take that will affect your hormones to stop a woman’s body from releasing an egg for fertilization. All kinds of things.”
“Humans are strange,” he says. “All life is precious.”
“I don’t disagree with you, but it’s also a monumental responsibility. One women don’t take lightly. If I were to ever have a child, I would want to create that life with intention, not by accident, with the right person, at the right time. I barely even know you, Theron, and we have barely been able to stay in the same room with one another without arguing.”
“Then why mate with me if you despise me so?”
I guess I can’t accuse him of not being direct. “Sometimes you don’t have to like someone to be attracted to them.”
“So you’re attracted to me?” That trademark arrogant grin of his returns.
“Don’t push it,” I say, but I’m smiling. “Are there any more questions, or can we get some sleep now?”
“Do you regret it? Truly?” he asks.
My thoughts return to how he’d felt, how he’d made me feel. Wanted, needed, cherished. At least before I realized what a terrible miscommunication we’d had. No one had ever made me feel that way before, like I was the only person in their field of vision. Growing up alone after they took my mother away, I was one of many orphaned children. A number in the system. Being around Theron, sleeping with him, was like having a bright spotlight shining in my direction.
“No, I don’t regret it,” I say, and then get to my feet. “I’m going to bed now. I’ll see you in the morning.”