Page 41 of Just Hold On

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Chapter 37

By the timeI got up to the chutes, a few riders had already gone. Some had been thrown, others had earned a few more points. Now, the next line of bulls was making their way in. The pungent stench of the animals was noticeable even over the haze from the crowd. I stood at the top of the chutes with a cluster of others, listening to the gates clank. Ty was beside me, holding my pretty pink helmet.

"That's him," he said, pointing to a big brown animal.

The bull kept thrashing his horns against the pipes, doing everything in his power to keep from moving forward. Gate attendants whooped and hollered behind him, but the beast would rather fight than cooperate. Then he'd move up one spot and try the whole thing all over again.

In the base of my belly, my guts were tense. Outside, I looked just as stoic as all the other riders. I sure wasn't about to let anyone see that this ride had me nervous. Instead, I focused on trying to understand the animal. How would he react when his rider was lighter? Would he even notice? Some of them slacked off, others thought it was an excuse to get stupid, but this bull had a reputation. This bull could be the one that put me in the hospital, but I wasn't going to go down hiding from it.

Then he surged forward, finally hitting the chute where he belonged. The gates slammed behind him, and Without Ado reared up, hoping to escape over the top. All around me, cowboys yelled and pushed, preventing the bull from damaging anything - including himself.

I just pulled off my hat and passed it over. "I like tulips," I said, taking my helmet.

Ty's head snapped over. "What?"

"Just in case," I explained, twisting my braid around the back of my head. "Red, yellow, whatever, but if I end up in the hospital from this, you won't have to guess."

He caught my wrist before I could slide the helmet on. "Then I'd better steal this while I can get it."

With one hand holding my braid up, the other caught in his, I was defenseless when my cowboy leaned in and pressed his mouth to mine. Instead, I giggled. A split second later, someone whooped from behind me, proving we'd been caught. Ty just leaned back, but there was a proud twinkle in his eye.

"And now they know." He tipped his head to my chute. "Ride safe, baby. I'll have your hat when you get off."

"Not fair," I grumbled, but we both knew I was teasing. That kiss had also made me forget that I was supposed to be nervous. Now, it was time for business. Leaning over the guy by the chute, I passed him my rope. "Left-handed, please."

The sound of my voice made the guy look up. He nodded once, then helped me work it under the bull's middle. When it was close, I strapped my helmet on and tossed a leg over, but kept my weight on the bars. There was plenty of time. Two riders in the chutes before me still had to go. That meant I had a chance to get this beast tied up right.

The first guy came off fast, so there went my lead time, but it didn't matter. I'd hold the whole thing up if I had to. Getting my rope right was more important than ever. When the guy by the gate started pulling, I reached over to warm the rosin, then worked the handle, trying hard to find the zone.

"Here," a familiar voice said, and my rope jerked. Looking up, I saw J.D. standing on the gate. The end of my rope was in his hands. "Ok, baby," he said. "New wrap today."

"I'm not changing things up, J.D."

He just pulled the rope a bit tighter. "Trust me, Cody. It's a variation of a suicide wrap, but it'll make it easier to get out. Perfected this last year."

"Don't care."

"Yeah, ya do. Just try it, and if you don't feel good about it, I'll pull for you to re-wrap."

There was something in his voice. It wasn't fear, but it sounded close. Insistent was the best I had. Adamant. When the man at the top of the rankings sounded like that, I decided he might know something I didn't.

"Fine. I'll try."

Then I grabbed the handle. My weight still wasn't on the bull, but he knew. Without Ado lunged, nearly knocking me onto his back with his antics - but I'd expected that. Nodding to show I was fine, I reached down for him again. This time, J.D. passed me the rope. It was nice and tight, just the way I wanted it. Like always, I laid it across my palm then wound it around the back, but when I put it back across, he leaned into the chute and pointed.

"Loop the tail back."

"That's three straps in my hand!" I looked up and shook my head. "Small hands, remember?"

"Yeah, and this is one time you wanna be able to get off more than stay on. Loop it back, but don't you dare tuck that end between your fingers."

I did, then finally understood what he was doing. "Like a slip knot?"

"Exactly, but no knot. Shit goes bad out there, scream and pull. The bullfighters are listening and ready. I already told Isaac you're preparing. This bad boy has a reputation, and I, for one, am tired of hearing the sound of bones breaking." Then he slapped the top of my helmet. "Good ride, cowboy."

"Girl," I yelled as he hopped down.

In the background, I could hear the announcer calling my name. The chute before me was empty. That meant I was next in line, and all that was holding up this show was me. Holding on to my handle, I eased my legs down beside the bull and onto his back. Once more, he thrashed, but this was a half-hearted effort. I was almost in place when he decided to double down.

Without Ado heaved, trying to catch his legs over the top of the chute and climb out. He didn't care that he had a rider on his back. He didn't stop when he hit the metal gate. Three times in a row, the massive animal just lunged, and I hung on, thankful for the heavy padding over the bar in front of my face.

And the whole time, my grip hadn't slipped. When the beast had all four feet on the ground, I scooted closer, expecting him to have another tantrum. Without Ado tensed. Just as I felt his muscles bunch, I nodded.

The gate swung open. The bull saw it, but was too stubborn to give in. He lunged, but it was straight forward, slamming him into the short side of the chute before he simply turned. I held, squeezing my legs tight. It felt like trying to ride a tornado. Every inch of the beast writhed. Nothing felt stable. Every buck slammed me back, and I wasn't sure I could do this. In my whole life, I'd never had a bull this powerful - this unpredictable. Before Without Ado even finished his false bucks, I knew. Twice, I felt my back pockets press into the bull's back, and I knew I was out of position.

I was going down. When the beast leapt into the air the first time, I was sure of it. Over the crowd, I could hear someone yelling my name, but it didn't matter. I was riding. My complete attention had to be on this, right here, right now. I felt the impact through my spine as the bull landed, but he was right back up, all four feet off the ground. He bent to the left for his spin, but in mid-air, he changed his mind.

Somehow, he twisted, flexing his body like a snake, and decided to go right. That should have been a good thing for me, but I couldn't keep up. I wasn't strong enough to hang on. Not this time. My legs slipped. My arm jerked straight, and rosin creaked as the rope started to give. Another jarring impact into the ground, and I was done for. When he jumped right back up, my leg completely left the side and my center turned to chaos.

I didn't think about it, didn't weigh the consequences. I just pulled the tail of my rope, setting myself free. For that split second, there was nothing. The roar of the crowd faded to silence. The lights above looked like stars, standing out against the pitch black of the ceiling. I was weightless, right up until my body slammed into the dirt, but that was what I'd expected. It took half a second to find the arena wall, and I was scrambling.

Red streaked past, identifying Jorge rushing in to turn the bull back. I was running the other way. My brand-new chaps flapped around my ankles, those rhinestones sparkling under the lights. The heels of my pretty green boots sank deep, and the grill before my eyes gave everything a distant feeling, but I saw the bars and jumped, grabbing at the rail to pull myself halfway up before looking back.

Without Ado was still bucking, still making his way around the arena, and he was pissed. When Tanner tried to tap his head, the animal charged. He ducked, but Isaac was too close. The bull kicked out, popping the bullfighter in yellow across the shoulder. The man hit the dirt hard, but they'd already turned Without Ado back for the chutes and Isaac was peeling himself off the ground. He was fine. I'd made it out alive. There was only one problem. The clock on the far wall was stopped at 5.3.

"And that's a no score for our rookie, Cody Jennings," the announcer said. "But don't think bad of this little lady. That bull has eighty-three rides on him, and..." He dragged that out, giving the guys on the floor enough time to convince the bull to actually exit the arena. "No one has managed to stay on him yet. This little girl might be real pretty in her pink, but it looks like no one's a match for Without Ado. Maybe next time, she'll be the one to finally ride this bad boy. Let's hear it for Cody, showing us that cowgirls really are tough!"

Somehow, that made me feel better. Knowing that no one else had ridden him either made the lack of points so much easier to accept. At least if I was going to fail, it was on an animal who'd made a name for taking out men better than me. I was going to count this as a win.

"Arm," someone said from across the rail, pulling my attention off the clock.

I turned back to the crowd, and found Renato standing there, offering me a hand to get the rest of the way over. Without hesitation, I accepted, then pulled off my helmet. He slapped me on the back and nodded.

"You did good," he said, then held out a hand to the stairs that led back to the chutes. "After you, ma'am."

"Don't give me that ma'am crap," I teased, but went.

What I didn't expect was the circus at the bottom. Ty was there, trading my helmet for my hat. So were the cameras. I quickly covered the mess of my hair, then tried to make my way past. That was when I realized they actually wanted to talk to me. I recognized ESPN, the PBR's dedicated reporter, and another that I couldn't identify with the lights in my eyes. All I could do was smile sweetly.

"Does this set you back?" someone asked. "Being bucked off by your first bull of the event. How does that help you prove that female riders can compete?"

I chuckled. "Well, the point is to walk out of the arena on my own two feet." I pointed down, proving I was doing so. "I did that, and didn't even scuff my lime green boots or lose any rhinestones from my chaps. Now, considering that Without Ado has a reputation for being unrideable? Well, I'm happy to be here and not sitting in an ambulance. Sounds like the boys are having just as much trouble."

"But," another reporter asked, "do you think your fans will care about those details?"

To answer, I looked right at the camera. "First, I'd like to say hi to all my fans. I'm still walkin', Daddy, so you can stop fretting. Second, I really don't care. I'm not here to make anyone happy except myself, and right now, I'm feeling pretty good." Then I nodded at them and pushed through the middle, making no excuses.

Ty just fell in at my side. "You did good."

"I know." Then I smiled to show I wasn't being a jerk, just honestly thrilled. "But you'd better stay on for eight seconds, Ty, or I'm spending the night with my father. And I need to thank J.D. for helping me get strapped in."

"Oh yeah? He might start making a habit of it." Ty grinned to show that wouldn't really bother him. "Or I will, depending on which of us isn't trying to get on our own bull."

I reached up to reset my hat just like he always did. "Careful, cowboy. I might start thinking you're trying to pawn me off already."

"Oh, no. Cody, I'm just saying that I'm making a real good effort at not being a jealous idiot." He hurried to catch up, falling in at my side and bending close to my ear. "Tell me, did he give you a kiss before he left your house on Thursday?"

"And if he did?" I asked.

Ty smiled. "He did, huh?"

"Yeah," I admitted.

"You like it?" he asked.

I just shrugged, but Ty grabbed my arm, pulling me to a stop so I had to look at him. "Cody, it's ok. I'm trying to say that you don't need to hide this from me. I'm ok with it."

I just tossed up my arms. "Why, Ty? Why don't you care at all unless this doesn't mean a thing?"

He shoved a hand across his mouth and a deep sigh fell out. "Because seeing you happy means more than anything else. Because for once in your life, you deserve to turn the tables. I dunno, Cody. Because when I heard that guy call you a slut, I swore to myself that if you want to act like I have for the past few years that I won't hold it against you? That maybe, just maybe, you deserve to have someone prove to you that it doesn't matter who you want to sleep with. All that's important is who you want to talk to, and that you don't have to pick in a week."

I felt like the air mysteriously vanished from my lungs, and my mind was swirling. "What?" I managed to get out.

"I'm saying that I'm not going to make you choose. I'm just asking that you don't try to hide it from me, ok? Don't sneak around to be with him. Be proud of it. Kiss him, kiss me, or kiss anyone else you want to. Or fuck. Or whatever else you want. Cody, stop trying to play by the boys' rules. Make us play by yours. I'm all in, baby."

"Yeah," I breathed. "I need to think about that, Ty, and you need to get ready to ride."

He nodded and stepped back. "Go see him. I got an easy bull. Go ask J.D. if he's on board, and then decide what you wanna do about this."

I couldn't say a thing, but that was exactly which way I turned my feet. Maybe getting a no score wasn't going to ruin my day, because this? What Ty was offering me? It sounded like every woman's dream come true.

I just hoped there wasn't a catch.


Tags: Kitty Cox Romance