Blinking rapidly, I tried to control the racing of my heart by breathing deeply. Purposefully. “Well,” I said and took one more deep breath. “The right thing to do would be to confess. So, if you want to tell the dean of the English department what I did to you, so there are no secrets or lies, I...I’ll understand. I can go with you right now, if you’d like.”
“I don’t—” He dodged in front of me to block my way to the door as if he feared I’d dart past him to go talk to Frenetti without his approval. “I mean, whoa. Hey.” He gave a nervous laugh and lifted his hands. It reminded of me of an animal whisperer trying to calm a scared, cornered creature. “There’s no reason to do that. No one saw us. No one knows. And you certainly don’t need to get yourself fired because of this.” He squinted his eyes. “And you would, wouldn’t you?”
I nodded. “Yes.” My voice cracked when I tried to add, “I’d be...”
“Fired,” he repeated with a decisive nod.
When I managed a single stiff nod in return, his shoulders fell. “That’s what I was afraid of.” He sucked his bottom lip in between his teeth in a brooding gesture. It really was too bad he looked so yummy doing it. I just wanted to— Gah! I had to stop thinking that way.
“So, what do you think?” I found the courage to ask, since I really did like thinking in this collaborative “we” term.
He looked up, his eyes startled. “About what?”
I swallowed, flushing. “About what we should do.”
“Oh.” He exhaled softly. “Uh...” His gaze slid over me, heating as if he remembered how my skin had felt under his hands. The look he sent me said exactly what he wanted to do. The fervor that passed through me as his stare traveled down my form made my nipples bead up, tight and tingly.
“Are you insane?” I gasped, suddenly very breathless.
“Yeah.” He blew out a hard breath as he took a step back. “I think maybe I am. Just a little.” Then his gaze raked over me again. “Or maybe a lot. Jesus, I can see how hard your nipples are through that blouse.”
Slapping my arms around my chest to cover the girls, I glared at him, hissing, “We are not starting some illicit affair, Mr. Gamble.”
“We’re not,” he repeated, but he made it more like a question than a repetitive statement.
I flushed. “No! Oh, my God. It...it would be unethical, dangerous, sleazy, and...and...and besides. We’re completely not compatible.”
“What?” The last comment made him blink back to reality and scowl at me. “You think not? And here, I can’t help but remember how very well we fit together.”
“Will you stop that?” Heat suffused me from head to toe, knowing exactly what he meant.
He cocked his head to the side, looking confused. “Stop what?”
“Stop...stop the flirting and references to what happened. We’re forgetting it. Remember?”
But he only grinned. “If I’m supposed to forget, then how can I remember?”
“Oh my God, you’re impossible.”
“If you’d let me, I’d finish what we started right here. Right now. You’re not drunk any longer, and that was the only thing holding me back.” An ornery grin curved up the right side of his mouth. “Didn’t you tell me how you dreamed about me taking you on this very desk?”
Color leached from my face. “I did not.” But Christ, had I? What had I told him?
“Oh, but you did. In very colorful detail.” He looked too happy to report my horrendous behavior, and I wanted to smack him and then kiss him and then probably tackle him onto my desk so he could take me in colorful detail.
“We shouldn’t be talking about this.” I spun away, facing a wall of bookshelves. Holy God, there was nowhere to go. I’d have to shimmy around him if I wanted to escape through the only doorway. There was the window, but we were on the third floor.
Maybe I should try it anyway.
“So then...I guess that means we’re not going to do anything about it, huh?”
“You need to leave, Mr. Gamble. This conversation is...it’s wrong.”
“I don’t see how it’s any more wrong than you agreeing to go out with a guy who’s already engaged to be married.”
“What?” I twisted my torso to face him.
He cocked a challenging eyebrow. “Dr. Chaplain. Are you telling me you don’t know he already has a fiancée?”