I know I’ve lost my mind now. I’m jumping from one emotion to the next, one epiphany to the next, and I can’t turn it off. I hiss in a mocking tone, “Trust me, Jules. I’ve got you, Jules. Jules, please marry me, even though I will drug you every night, and I promise not to sell you until I grow tired of you!”
His grip on my wrists tightens to the point of pain and I wince. I can’t even move an inch. I watch as his jaws clench and his eyes narrow. I’ve hit a nerve. Good, because I’m going to hit more than that once I’m out from under him. I hate him. I hate every part of him. God, I’m such a fool.
“You just keep deceiving me, placing me in one pitfall after another. Now what? What’s the next snare, ambush, setup, or whatever you want to call it? Do I get sold now? Am I used goods? Are you bored with me yet?”
“Listen to me! Stop!” he bellows so loud it’s like a sonic boom piercing my eardrums, effectively shutting me down. I watch him closely as he closes his eyes tightly and takes a deep breath through his nose, trying to calm down. When his eyes open, they’re full of dogged determination. I can tell he’s trying not to speak through clenched teeth, but his jaw muscles are working overtime. Exasperation and desperation leaks out past his lips with every word. “I can’t tell you everything, but I will tell you this…”
“Tell me what, Travis? That you’ve warped my mind, twisted my perceptions every which way, so much so I don’t know what’s true or false, right or wrong, up or down?”
“Fucking hell, Julianna! Enough!” My ranting dies in my throat. I’ve never heard that loud of a decibel emanate from the depths of his lungs before, and his glare is murderous. I swallow hard; effectively shut down once again.
His nostrils flare, his chest heaves, and he is oh-so-pissed off now. He’s beginning to scare the crap out of me, but he’s not the one who has the right to be pissed. Nevertheless, he’s intimidating me terribly, and this time, he does speak through clenched teeth. He bares his canines like a rabid dog, and in a strong, sonorous voice, he speaks with conviction. “I have never needed anyone. Never! That is, until you came along. I fucking need you!” His words are accentuated by squeezing against my wrists at the same time he tries to reassure me with each of his words.
He’s stunned me stupid, and silence ensues for a moment as I watch his eyes transform into a soft plead. “My walls come tumbling down when I’m around you, Jules. You leave me exposed like a fucking minnow in a shark tank. God, baby, you’ve got to follow your heart on this, not your head. I need you to think about all we’ve shared over the past few weeks.”
He gestures with his eyes, flicking them back and forth over mine. “This…this wasn’t a game or a façade; I swear.” His voice changes from angry to a softer tone. He sounds as if he’s swallowed a mouthful of marbles, and his emerald eyes become misty, something I’ve never seen happen to this strong man ever before. “I promise you…I was exposing the real me; I gave you all of me. I held nothing back.” He shakes his head while hanging his head in defeat, closing his eyes for a moment. “I know whatever I say at this point you won’t believe it, but I’m not lying to you about this…about us. You’ve got to give us time to work this out, Jules. Let me prove myself to you.”
He chokes on his last words, his voice gritty as sandpaper. “From the first moment I saw you, I felt a connection. We belong together, baby. I’m begging you. Don’t…don’t shut this down.”
My heart stupidly clenches for the man as his eyes mist over. “But I have a life, Travis. Well, I had a life…” I trail off on a choked sob. I’m so confused; I don’t know what to believe anymore. These men have ripped my life apart. Do I even have a life to go back to at this point? In the brief silent moment that transpires between us, we silently stare each other down with untold emotions.
I startle at the sound of someone clapping their hands behind Travis, and I feel Travis tense, obviously not expecting the presence either. The sound stills my heart, and I can’t see who it is because of Travis’ large frame blocking my view. He holds stock still, as if he’s in a trance, while our eyes stay locked on each other’s’. He stays frozen in his position on the bed, thereby continuing to keep me pinned down, and the look on his face tells me this isn’t going to be good.