But as he tried to keep quiet, the shouting gained more volume, as if Dane had located his hideout.
Lightning turned the world outside white, and the call for Jag to reveal himself transformed into a high-pitched shriek when thunder echoed through the junkyard.
“Fuck! Jag!” Dane cried as soon as the noise was over.
Jag might’ve been sore about the way things had ended between them, but his love wasn’t real, and he didn’t want Dane to wander around the junkyard in such dangerous conditions.
Despite sadness spreading through his heart like a virus, he forced himself to move and imitated the blackbird call he’d taught Dane so they could communicate from afar. Right now, he felt like the most miserable bird, with both wings so broken it would never again be able to fly.
He put his pain into the calls, but when footsteps splashed in mud just beyond the walls of his hideout, his fatigued body refused to participate in his pathetic begging for Dane’s attention, and he ended up coughing. When the sky outside lit up again, Dane lifted the plastic cover and peeked inside.
“There you are,” he uttered, crawling under the wooden table with raindrops clinging to his glasses.
Jag tried to say something, but seeing Dane in person made him sob, and he covered his face in shame. Dane grabbed his wrists and peeled them away, flashing Jag a damp scowl.
“What the hell? You need to rest! In a warm bed. What if you get the wound infected?” he asked, shoving back the yellow hood that protected his hair from the rain.
Jag shook his head, swallowing the throbbing ball in his throat. “I don’t know what you came for. Just leave me to die. I’m weak and wounded, and useless, and it’s only natural that I don’t survive.”
Dane crooked his head. “I would have slapped you if you weren’t injured! What the actual fuck! Are you saying I should have died too because I hadn’t been able to protect myself from Rob?”
Jag hummed at the flaw in his own logic. “But… we’re different. You’re sweet, and tender, and smart, and I’m supposed to be a predator. That’s all I’m good at. If I can’t do that, what’s the point?”
Dane shifted and leaned in so close Jag could feel his breath. “You’re so fucking dense sometimes. You’re also sweet, and smart, and tender, and you deserve to be looked after until you feel better. That’s what group—what pack members do for each other!”
Jag glanced at him, not sure what to make of this change of heart. “You didn’t want to be part of my pack. You will leave as soon as it’s safe.” And yet his heart already called out to Dane with all the needy questions. You think I’m sweet? You think I’m smart?
Dane’s face twisted into a dark grimace, and he raised his hands, folding his fingers into claws. “All I wanted was for you to consider my opinion. I wanted to see my family, but you just didn’t care! It was either your way or the highway. That is not how relationships work,” Dane barked before leaning back, all breathless.
It was time to come clean, because Jag had nothing left to lose if he couldn’t have Dane. “Because I knew you’d never come back. I don’t know how to live out there, in the cities, and I wanted you to only see me here, where I’m worth something. I’m nothing like the men you’re used to. I don’t have a fancy house or a car. I can’t even drive. Hell, I can’t even read.” Something he’d found out the hard way was a cause for mockery. “I’m of no use to you, and you know it.”
Dane stilled, watching him with a soft light in his eyes. His Adam’s apple rolled up and down, and he cleared his throat before reaching for Jag’s hand and squeezing it. While damp, they were so, so warm.
“That’s not true. I was afraid and missed my family, but being with you was an adventure.”
Jag shook his head and sniffed. “I never wanted to frighten you. I just… I just thought I needed to be stern so you respected my authority.”
Dane exhaled, looking away in exasperation. “Love isn’t about authority. Jag… if someone doesn’t have the freedom to choose, how can we even talk about love to begin with? Isn’t it worth more if I decide to be with you on my own, not because you force me into it?”
Jag whined and curled his knees up to his chin, unable to fight the tears pooling in his eyes. “Why would anyone choose me?”
Dane’s touch radiated heat all over Jag’s body when he leaned in again, stroking Jag’s side with such gentleness it could only rival the touch of Jag’s mother a long, long time ago, when he hadn’t been yet considered a man.