I moaned for him. I screamed. And for the second time that night, I came with him deep between my legs, this time on his cock. I came so hard I nearly fell, but he kept me pinned there as my vision blurred and dimmed and my head was a white-hot furnace of bliss.
That must’ve knocked him over the edge. He thrust deep and something warm filled me. He came inside and growled, biting my shoulder hard enough to leave a bruise.
When he was done, I turned and kissed him. He held me there, kissing me back. I stared into his eyes, biting my lip, trying not to cry.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, frowning. “Did I—?”
“No, it’s not that.” I shook my head, burying my face into his chest. “I was a virgin.”
He didn’t move. He stiffened like I’d slapped him in the face. But slowly, he calmed down, and kissed me.
“Come on.” He led me down the hall by the hand. He dragged me into his bathroom, turned on the shower, and took me in with him.
He washed the blood from his cock. He washed it from between my legs, and he kissed me so tenderly I nearly started crying again. When he finished, he toweled me off, let me borrow some of his comfortable sweats, and put me into his bed.
“I’m taking your pills,” he said as he wrapped his arms around me.
I nodded and rolled over to bury my face in his chest.
This was a mistake. It was a horrible mistake.
But I couldn’t stop it. Not now, not after that.
I curled closer and let sleep take me.
Chapter 14
Carmine
The Lowdown was cleaned up and repaired by the time Cap and Mal got back from their honeymoon.
“The place looks almost normal,” Cap said, sipping a martini at the bar. Jules poured me a whiskey and slid it over with a nod. I smiled back and raised it to her.
“You two are getting along,” Mal said, frowning at me.
“Trying to, anyway,” I said and sipped the drink. Jules went off to help some other customers. “It’s not ideal for either of us, but you know how it is.”
Cap’s eyebrows raised. “Uh, do we?”
“I don’t think we do,” Mal said.
“Assholes.” I glared at them. “You’re both too tan. And too happy.”
Mal laughed and put an arm around Cap’s shoulder. She leaned her head against his shoulder and nuzzled his neck.
“We had a lovely time, thanks for asking,” Cal said and kissed his neck.
“I’m going to puke. Right here on the bar. Jules will have to clean it up. Do you want to do that to her?”
“She won’t mind,” Mal said.
“She’ll mind. I promise she’ll mind.” I sighed and shook my head. “I’m happy for you two, I really am. But I hate this lovebird bullshit.”
“You mean, like the way you look at Jules?” Cap grinned at me and winked.
I rubbed my face. “I wanted to say I missed you two, but no, I really didn’t.”
“Liar,” Cap said. “We’re delightful.”
Mal grunted. “She’s delightful. I’m Mal.”
I laughed and toasted him. I drank deep, watching Jules move. She was limping more than normal and I felt a bitter worry in my stomach.
After that night of knee-shaking sex, the night I’d taken her virginity, I’d stolen the pills from her room. I’d taken them and hidden them in my room. Ever since, she’d have to ask if she wanted one, and for the most part I gave her whatever she wanted.
But I worried I was depriving her too much. Pain was real, and pain could fuck with a person on a deep level. She needed doctors and probably some expensive and complicated corrective surgery, but she was too damn stubborn.
For now, it was the pills.
Which were pretty common prescription painkillers and not hard to get hold of. So she’d never run low now that I was involved at least. And I could monitor her intake.
All in all, a good system. But not perfect.
“You look worried,” Cap said when Mal got up to use the bathroom. “What’s going on?”
“Work stuff,” I said, shaking my head.
Cap frowned at me. “You’re lying. I know all about the work stuff. It’s Jules.”
“I can’t talk about it.”
“Not even with me?”
“I’m sorry, Cap. I love you. You know I do. But I can’t talk about it. It’s not my secret to share.”
Cap nodded slowly. “You care about her, huh?”
“I don’t know what I feel about her.”
“You should figure that out.” Cap leaned in closer. “What’s the word on my father?”
“I sent Cezary a message. Killed his cousin. So I suspect they’ll make the next move.”
“We’re waiting then?”
“I have men out looking for your father. But for now, we’re waiting.”
She sighed and tugged at her hair. “If that’s what you think’s best. I know Mal wants to hit the streets again.”
“That boy can’t keep himself from violence.”